Starting Over with My Natural Hair :-/

[Poohbear]

On Saturday, February 25, 2012, I am going to a salon to get a Deva cut. I found a stylist in my area who has been trained to do this type of cut where they cut the individual curls or coils on dry hair. I have a ton of splits, ALL TYPES of splits, more than on that picture of splits that has been shown online, and my hair has breakage here and there whenever I touch it.

As some of you may know, my hair has stayed around armpit length since 2009. I did reach bottom of shoulder blade (BSB) length at the end of last year, but I still feel like it's APL. But anyway, I believe I know why I have not been reaching my hair length goals of mid-back length or waist length now... flat ironing and the use of silicones.

My hair is extremely tightly coiled and even though I can get a very smooth look and keep my natural hair straight for several weeks, I believe the flat iron was smashing my coils together and the friction of moving the flat iron down my hair shaft would cause splits. I have flat ironed my hair alot thinking it was helping my hair ends when it was really just covering up the problem. I'm unsure about the use of the blowdryer but I am now avoiding the blowdryer as well.

I also think silicones play a role as well because before going natural, I never used alot of products nor products with silicones in them. Even in the beginning of my natural journey after doing the big chop in 2005, I didn't use cone products. My main product was S-Curl. Anyway, I know Aussie Moist Conditioner became one of my favorite products over the years. I loved the smell and how it made my hair feel so much that I would even leave it in my hair without washing it out. And you see, I did not shampoo my hair often, so over time, I believe the silicones built up and dried out my hair as they sat on my hair for weeks at a time without being washed out.

So now, I have been HEAT FREE since September 2011. Airdrying has been frustrating at times, but I've been sticking with it and getting through it. I stopped using products silicone ingredients about 1-2 weeks ago. I did a final wash with a sulfate shampoo (Suave Clarifying Shampoo) to get the cones out of my hair. I will now be following the Curly Girl method and cannot wait to get this Deva cut/trim so I can start back growing out my hair.

I do not think my length retention has anything to do with the hair styles I wear. However, I will be reducing the usage of combs/brushes and will be using my fingers to detangle and style. I believe combing tightly coily dry hair has caused split ends for me as well. I am just sick of looking at these splits and broken hairs.

So the hair products that I will be using (not altogether) are as follows:

To wash: Suave Tropical Coconut Conditioner or Mane N Tail Conditioner

To deep condition: Lustrasilk Shea Butter Cholesterol

To moisturize/style: Shea Moisture Curl Enhancing Smoothie, Curl & Style Milk, or Curl & Shine Mist, or African Royale BRX Spray

Just wanted to share with my ladies here on LHCF. Thank you for your support, encouragement, and advice over the years of being a member here.

 

[L.Brown1114]

aaaaawwwww i havnt been on here in a minute but dont let these small set backs discourage you!! LHCF got yo back!

 

[sikora]

What length will you be starting over from? Have you ever tried seamless combs? That made a huge difference for me with regards to splits.

Sent from my iPhone using LHCF

 

[CaliiSwagg]

You should be proud of yourself for all of the progress you have made thus far!! I wish you the best of luck on your continued hair journey.
I am certain your hair will flourish from making the appropriate changes to your regimen and starting a clean slate.

 

[reeko43]

Wow. I hope that your change in regimen and hair cut will bring you the results you desire. Please let us know what you think about the cut. I have been wanting to get one but don't know of anyone in my area.

Hang in there!

 

[Poohbear]

What length will you be starting over from? Have you ever tried seamless combs? That made a huge difference for me with regards to splits.

Sent from my iPhone using LHCF

sikora - I'm not sure what length I will be starting from, but I will see this Saturday after she cuts my hair. I want to get rid of as many splits as possible. I was unable to get rid of them from doing my own "search and destroy" method. There are some splits that go up two inches from the ends - holes, bubbles, chains, shreds, slits, knots, just all types of ugly splits!

I've never tried seamless combs. I have checked them out in the past when they were mentioned in threads on LHCF, but I never bought any. I thought they were too expensive for me. Since doing research on the Curly Girl method, I started having a whole different outlook on the "need" to detangle my hair with a comb when it comes to my particular hair texture. In other words, I am going to start embracing my texture more and letting it do what it wants more rather than trying to force it to do something else. Hope that makes sense.

 

[Poohbear]

Wow. I hope that your change in regimen and hair cut will bring you the results you desire. Please let us know what you think about the cut. I have been wanting to get one but don't know of anyone in my area.

Hang in there!

reeko43 - I went to this site to find the curly stylist http://www.mydevacurl.com/curly_stylist_finder

Three choices came up for my city and I called one of the ladies and just asked her a ton of questions and told her about my hair and she made me feel comfortable enough to trust her to cut my hair. I haven't been to a salon in forever. I've always been a "do-it-yourself" carer for my hair.

 

[greenandchic]

sikora - I'm not sure what length I will be starting from, but I will see this Saturday after she cuts my hair. I want to get rid of as many splits as possible. I was unable to get rid of them from doing my own "search and destroy" method. There are some splits that go up two inches from the ends - holes, bubbles, chains, shreds, slits, knots, just all types of ugly splits!

I've never tried seamless combs. I have checked them out in the past when they were mentioned in threads on LHCF, but I never bought any. I thought they were too expensive for me. Since doing research on the Curly Girl method, I started having a whole different outlook on the "need" to detangle my hair with a comb when it comes to my particular hair texture. In other words, I am going to start embracing my texture more and letting it do what it wants more rather than trying to force it to do something else. Hope that makes sense.

Detangling is not "forcing" your hair to do something else, its just getting the tangles out to prevent knots and eventually breakage, etc. One of my biggest recent mistakes is not fully detangling my hair and ending up with a couple of locks and major tangles.

 

[jayjaycurlz]

Poohbear - what is this 'Curly Girl' method you speak of?

 

[Poohbear]

Detangling is not "forcing" your hair to do something else, its just getting the tangles out to prevent knots and eventually breakage, etc. One of my biggest recent mistakes is not fully detangling my hair and ending up with a couple of locks and major tangles.

I didn't mean it like that. Not sure how else to explain it. But detangling with combs/brushes can also cause knots and breakage on certain hair types, especially mine which has happened. It disturbs the natural hair pattern.

 

[Poohbear]

Poohbear - what is this 'Curly Girl' method you speak of?

jayjaycurlz - check out this article about it: http://m.wikihow.com/Follow-the-Curly-Girl-Method-for-Curly-Hair

Lorraine Massey has a book about it. You can also check out the MyDevaCurl site and YouTube has a lot of videos about it. Here's one in particular even though her hair texture is looser than mine http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=wvzJsTZ1bJQ#t=322s

Hope that helps.

 

[yuhlovevybz]

Good luck with re-starting your journey! I've had to do this awhile ago and I think I had the same issues; I had mid-shaft splits and end of shaft splits and top of shaft splits...everthing possible. What helped most was not combing as much, not using mineral oils or greases, lately I haven't seen any more outrageous splits. I've actually never had a HUGE problem with cones, but the cones I use there is only one in the product and I use sulfates so that they do get washed out.

Do you think your hair might be getting weak from too much moisture? I see you wash with conditioners but no shampoos. I like the suave conditioner but it's very conditioning (if that makes sense). Too much moisture could be bad. But that conditioner is really good if you like to detangle under the shower. Idk about other people but I find detangling pointless if you wash your hair or stretch your hair often, because really how tangled can it get? And the tangles slide outwith water. That's just my experience. Combs wrecked my hair (they were seamed but still) so I think you might find improvement just by getting rid of the cones and the combing, but a haircut wouln't hurt either.

Which mane and tail conditioner are you using? The olive oil complex is the absolute bestttt, I could never go back after that. Your choice of products seems a lot like mine. My hair and wallet love the simple things. It sucks to spend tons of money ordering products just to find they don't work

 

[manter26]

Good luck to you! And I think it's important to spread the word that heat is not the panacea many think it is. I see so often "my hair LOVES heat" but things can turn out different in the long run.

Come back with pics of the cut!

 

[drmuffin]

Aww you're cutting your hair the day I big chopped. I've been an admirer of your hair since I've been on here and I actually can't wait to see what your hair looks like after the cut! Good luck!!

 

[Poohbear]

Do you think your hair might be getting weak from too much moisture? I see you wash with conditioners but no shampoos. I like the suave conditioner but it's very conditioning (if that makes sense). Too much moisture could be bad. But that conditioner is really good if you like to detangle under the shower. Idk about other people but I find detangling pointless if you wash your hair or stretch your hair often, because really how tangled can it get? And the tangles slide outwith water. That's just my experience. Combs wrecked my hair (they were seamed but still) so I think you might find improvement just by getting rid of the cones and the combing, but a haircut wouln't hurt either.

Which mane and tail conditioner are you using? The olive oil complex is the absolute bestttt, I could never go back after that. Your choice of products seems a lot like mine. My hair and wallet love the simple things. It sucks to spend tons of money ordering products just to find they don't work

yuhlovevybz

No, because washing with conditioners is part of my NEW routine now. I have used shampoo all my life. There was one time during my natural hair journey where I was getting too much moisture where my hair felt mushy from S-Curl but that was back in 2006. So I stopped moisturizing my hair as much. I believe my hair has been getting weak recently from dryness.

And I am starting to feel the same way as you about detangling...it's somewhat pointless if you do not plan on straightening your hair or anything. It's just more manipulation when your hair is going to shrink up anyway. I also have fine-stranded hair so doing all that detangling can put too much stress on my hair.

I'm also cheap and simple when it comes to products. The Shea Moisture products were a Christmas gift so I didn't buy those. Here's a pic of the Mane N Tail Conditioner I use:

 

[Shay72]

Poohbear
I hear you. My hair is a tightly coiled 4a with some 3C and 4B. I am primarily 4a though. So combing or brushing through my coils seemed counterintuitive to me. So I stopped. I've since switched to the Curly Girl Method which includes finger detangling daily. That works for me & my hair.

I had to kick the cones to the curb too. My coils were weighed down badly. I did a detox with Terresssentials and switched to Curly Girl and I've been loving it every since.

 

[NYDee]

Poohbear, don't Mane N Tail Conditioner contain cones?

 

[Whimsy]

Good luck Poohbear. I can't wait to see the cut. Let us know how it goes with the stylist.
I hope your new regimen works well for you. I honestly think cutting out the heat will make the most difference of all.

 

[Poohbear]

Poohbear, don't Mane N Tail Conditioner contain cones?

NYDee

Not the one I have. Here's the ingredients on the bottle I have:

Water, Stearamidopropyl Dimethylamine Lactate, Distearyldimonium Chloride, Stearyl Alcohol, Emulsifying Wax NF, Cetyl Alcohol, Coconut Oil, Glycerin, Sodium Chloride, Vegetable Oil, Fragrance, Hydrolyzed Protein, Lanolin, Phenoxyethanol, Methylparaben, Propylparaben, F D & C Yellow #5.

 

[MzSwift]

Thank you so much for posting this. You were one of the heat using naturals whose progress I was watching. Because of your honesty I've decided to postpone my use of frequent heat until I reach longer lengths. And ITA, finger detangling seems to be the best option for my tightly coiled hair. I've primarily used my fingers since 2009. My hair is at its worst after using a pick or comb and after blow drying with an attachment.

I hope this fresh start is just what you need. Good luck on your new journey!

 

[FoxxyLocs]

Good luck Poohbear! I think we have a similar hair type. Idk if you've ever tried Elucence moisture balance shampoo, but that's the only shampoo (along with Chagrin valley poo bars, but I know not everyone likes those) that didn't dry my hair out. I found that I couldn't cut shampoo completely out of my routine, so that may be something to try if you find yourself in the same boat.

ETA: About detangling - I'm only detangling once a month now. I've been doing this since Nov./Dec. and it's working out really well for me. I haven't had any issues with matting, and I'm spending a lot less time on my hair now.

 

[ravenhairedcharm]

Thanks for sharing your experience with us. Late last year, I thought that I was going to start blow drying my hair every month in order to "keep it manageable". I stopped after doing it only 2 times (both times I installed braids myself as a protective style, so it made it easier to part my hair and whatnot). Nothing bad happened after that, but I realized I would just rather not incorporate heat into my regimen and plus my hair got a little longer, so doing my hair isn't even that hard anymore. I'm pretty sure if I continued, I would have to do more frequent trims and I would notice excessive splits and the like. You can only protect your hair from heat so much.

Like some of you have already mentioned, I let my hair clump together in coils, because it seems so counterintuitive to comb through coils! That may work for straight hair since the strands act as individual and separate entities, but not coily hair. I've stopped combing my hair, and I only need to detangle with my fingers once a week. The stream of the shower does a great job at seperating my coils and not my individual strands that are suppose to be together. Does that make any sense? lol

Anyway, good luck on your journey! I'm sure you'll bounce back to full healthy hair sooner than you know it.

 

[BostonMaria]

Just wanted to say good luck.

Sent from my iPhone using LHCF

 

[HairPleezeGrow]

Best of luck to you. I know this may seem like a dumb question but how can you tell if your products have silicones in them? Do they say silicone in the ingredients or is there another name for cones

 

[~~HoneyComb~~]

Wish you the best on your new hair journey.

I can't wait to see the results of your Devacut.

I ordered the book over a month ago and have been doing the CG method for about 6 weeks now. In the beginning my hair didn't look so great and that is the time that most folks want to give up because they think it's not working. You have to give yourself time on this method, about 6-8 weeks before you truly notice a difference.

Each week I notice more and more improvement with my hair. It's more shiny, my curls are more clumped together because I no longer use a brush, but my fingers or a wide tooth comb.

I use Suave Coconut Conditioner or Tresemme (no silicones), when I want to use a little more cleanser on my scalp I use a sulfate free shampoo Nature's Gate, and for styling I use hair gels without parabens/silicones.

Hang in there!!

 

[Je Ne Sais Quoi]

Join me in the no heat challenge. my hair is THRIVING!!!

I'm sorry about your set back and i wish you a full and speedy hair growing recovery.

 

[Poohbear]

Best of luck to you. I know this may seem like a dumb question but how can you tell if your products have silicones in them? Do they say silicone in the ingredients or is there another name for cones

HairPleezeGrow - If the ingredient ends with -cone, -conol, -col, or -xane, then it is a silicone.

 

[Poohbear]

Join me in the no heat challenge. my hair is THRIVING!!!

I'm sorry about your set back and i wish you a full and speedy hair growing recovery.

Je Ne Sais Quoi - I already have. I've even made a couple of posts in your no heat challenge thread as well.

 

[Foxglove]

I'll be watching. I'm ~APL but the longer my hair gets the harder retention is for me it seems. I've done a year of braids/twists on and off and I'm planning on avoiding heat for a year (except occasional light blowdrying)

 

[futurelonglocks]

Poohbear I've been doing the CG method along with finger detangling once/twice a week. This has been working great for me as I am 4a/4b with tightly coiled hair (back and crown area). Many blessings on your new hair routine as I'm sure its gonna work for you