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I can't use jojoba oil on my hair. Makes it feel as dry as the sahara desert and brittle, just as you said. My hair so far seems to like coconut oil, avocado oil, and sweet almond oil. My hair doesn't like grapeseed oil either, but that's another story .
I use Queen Helene Jojoba Oil and add it to my DC. I never use it cool or room temp though. I always heat it up. My hair loves it. Have you tried warming it?