"Her hair is a WEAVE!"

[Crystalicequeen123]

Ugh....why do black women say this??

Okay here's what happened...

Me, my mom, and a friend of mine stopped at the gas station on our way somewhere today, and I got out to go buy something. While inside, I noticed that this black woman had beautiful long healthy-looking hair. I'm talking at least bra-strap length, shiny, thick from-root-to-tip hair! I was admiring her hair, and after some quick investigation (hehe... ) I deduced that this was indeed her REAL hair. I've gotten pretty good at being able to tell these days.

Well, when I got back to the car my mom saw the woman inside of the gas station store walking around, and here's how the conversation went:

Mom: "Oh look at her weave" (chuckle)
Me: "Actually, I believe that was her hair"
Mom: "Oh yeah right...her hair is a weave and you know it!"
Me: "Umm...no, I actually saw her up close and I'm pretty sure that's her hair."
Mom: "Not with hair that long and shiny"
Me: (shaking my head in disbelief @ her comments)

THEN the woman walks out of the store, and my friend (who's a licenced beautician by the way) quips up and says:

Friend: "Yep...that's all her hair...I can tell"
Me: "SEE! I told you!! Sandra (my friend) would know because she's a licensed beautician! Believe it or not, there are SOME black women who have long hair like that"
Friend: "Yeah, but she was light-skinned though"
Me: *silence*

Okay, this whole interaction that took place in the car just made me so furious!! If only my mom, my friend, and black women in general could take a look at some of the pictures of beautiful heads of hair here on this board, they would be shocked!! I'm talking about even DARKER-skinned women (imagine that!) having long, thick, gorgeous natural hair!!

Ugh...I just dont' understand why we as a people in general seem to believe the hype that black women can't grow hair long, and if they DO have long hair, they have to be "light-skinned".

Not only that but as if that wasn't bad enough, my uncle came over to visit the other day, and my aunt was telling a story about a black co-worker of hers that has "long hair down to her waist", that she always keeps in a pony-tail. I'm telling you, before my aunt could even finish telling her story, my uncle interrupts saying: "She's black?? With waist-length hair??" Looking all perplexed and surprised. Then my aunt says: "Well, I think she has some hispanic in her..."

I'm just sitting there thinking..."why??"

What happened today has just STRENGTHENED my resolve even more to grow my hair as long as I can get it! I'll show them!

Thanks for listening to me vent... I had to blow off some steam...

 

[sexyeyes3616]

.............

 

[sexyeyes3616]

nevermind....

 

[Solitude]

Hmm....I understand your frustration, but I think people really can't tell sometimes because so many weaves look natural. When I was younger and my hair was a couple of inches past SL, even my own friends believed that I wore tracks in the back!

It's sad, but I believe that it's going to be a long, long time before people's attitudes change, if they ever do. I personally don't see things changing as long as you have every single black celebrity wearing weaves and PRETENDING like it is their natural hair; people kind of assume that other black women do the same thing.

 

[MichelleMyBelle]

Oh no, not another light skinned long hair thread. All shades of black women have long and short hair. Some people are just stubborn and want to believe and perpetuate stereotypes (not meaning you OP). Just let it go!

 

[drasgrl]

Probably because a lot of black women have weaves. When I go out I swear I see tons more weaves than I see real hair and really it's starting to piss me off. Nobody it seems wears their real hair. What's wrong with that? Sorry I don't mean to offend people with weaves but I'm getting sick of seeing only weaves everywhere I go.

 

[locabouthair]

thats just how some people think. my mom is light skinned with hair that hasnt grow past her neck.

its that mentality thats holding us back. like henry ford said, "whether you think you can or you can't, you're right".

I would just ignore them and keep working on my hair goals.

 

[locabouthair]

Hmm....I understand your frustration, but I think people really can't tell sometimes because so many weaves look natural. When I was younger and my hair was a couple of inches past SL, even my own friends believed that I wore tracks in the back!

It's sad, but I believe that it's going to be a long, long time before people's attitudes change, if they ever do. I personally don't see things changing as long as you have every single black celebrity wearing weaves and PRETENDING like it is their natural hair; people kind of assume that other black women do the same thing.

yes we do have a LONG way to go, if things ever change.

I know some people think i might be stupid for trying to grow my hair, cuz I'm dark skinned after all but I dont care, I'm gonna keep doing me.

 

[Neith]

I agree with you...

People are dumb/ignorant. I've had to school quite a few people in real life.

At the same time as of late these types of threads have been done to DEATH. lol... hopefully you don't get too much flak for it.

 

[BlackHairDiva]

Sounds like me and my mom last night!!!

I showed a clip on youtube of this woman who had incredible hair. She was showing her ayuverdic regiment. She showed her hair being flat iron and her hair was long. Mom concluded that she was mixed. I could tell by looking at her wasen't mixed and her hair looked like mine. I knew her hair looked impeccable cause she has an execellent hair regiment. Mom said no she is mixed! I was so not happy. Deep Inside I felt like showing that clip was just asking for a bunch of problems. I'm more relunctant of showing any hair clips or hair info.

I did wrote my mom a hair regiment. Did about 20 copies. Guess what, Mom never used one of the product I bought her. When I asked her why, she said it would take too much time.

Then, when my brother comes around she mumbles that I hide things from her and that I have regiments. . That is why I'm reluctant to tell her stuff nowadays.

Ugh....why do black women say this??

Okay here's what happened...

Me, my mom, and a friend of mine stopped at the gas station on our way somewhere today, and I got out to go buy something. While inside, I noticed that this black woman had beautiful long healthy-looking hair. I'm talking at least bra-strap length, shiny, thick from-root-to-tip hair! I was admiring her hair, and after some quick investigation (hehe... ) I deduced that this was indeed her REAL hair. I've gotten pretty good at being able to tell these days.

Well, when I got back to the car my mom saw the woman inside of the gas station store walking around, and here's how the conversation went:

Mom: "Oh look at her weave" (chuckle)
Me: "Actually, I believe that was her hair"
Mom: "Oh yeah right...her hair is a weave and you know it!"
Me: "Umm...no, I actually saw her up close and I'm pretty sure that's her hair."
Mom: "Not with hair that long and shiny"
Me: (shaking my head in disbelief @ her comments)

THEN the woman walks out of the store, and my friend (who's a licenced beautician by the way) quips up and says:

Friend: "Yep...that's all her hair...I can tell"
Me: "SEE! I told you!! Sandra (my friend) would know because she's a licensed beautician! Believe it or not, there are SOME black women who have long hair like that"
Friend: "Yeah, but she was light-skinned though"
Me: *silence*

Okay, this whole interaction that took place in the car just made me so furious!! If only my mom, my friend, and black women in general could take a look at some of the pictures of beautiful heads of hair here on this board, they would be shocked!! I'm talking about even DARKER-skinned women (imagine that!) having long, thick, gorgeous natural hair!!

Ugh...I just dont' understand why we as a people in general seem to believe the hype that black women can't grow hair long, and if they DO have long hair, they have to be "light-skinned".

Not only that but as if that wasn't bad enough, my uncle came over to visit the other day, and my aunt was telling a story about a black co-worker of hers that has "long hair down to her waist", that she always keeps in a pony-tail. I'm telling you, before my aunt could even finish telling her story, my uncle interrupts saying: "She's black?? With waist-length hair??" Looking all perplexed and surprised. Then my aunt says: "Well, I think she has some hispanic in her..."

I'm just sitting there thinking..."why??"

What happened today has just STRENGTHENED my resolve even more to grow my hair as long as I can get it! I'll show them!

Thanks for listening to me vent... I had to blow off some steam...

 

[sexyeyes3616]

Sounds like me and my mom last night!!!

I showed a clip on youtube of this woman who had incredible hair. She was showing her ayuverdic regiment. She showed her hair being flat iron and her hair was long. Mom concluded that she was mixed. I could tell by looking at her wasen't mixed and her hair looked like mine. I knew her hair looked impeccable cause she has an execellent hair regiment. Mom said no she is mixed! I was so not happy. Deep Inside I felt like showing that clip was just asking for a bunch of problems. I'm more relunctant of showing any hair clips or hair info.

I did wrote my mom a hair regiment. Did about 20 copies. Guess what, Mom never used one of the product I bought her. When I asked her why, she said it would take too much time.

Then, when my brother comes around she mumbles that I hide things from her and that I have regiments. . That is why I'm reluctant to tell her stuff nowadays.

My mom thinks like this as well.

 

[chicacanella]

thats just how some people think. my mom is light skinned with hair that hasnt grow past her neck.

its that mentality thats holding us back. like henry ford said, "whether you think you can or you can't, you're right".

I would just ignore them and keep working on my hair goals.

I like this quote. Crystal, I don't even bother with people like this.

yes we do have a LONG way to go, if things ever change.

I know some people think i might be stupid for trying to grow my hair, cuz I'm dark skinned after all but I dont care, I'm gonna keep doing me.

this is weird to me because most of the people on my mom's side are dark and have the longest hair or the so called *good hair."

 

[SimpleKomplexity]

Dang....it's like a million posts like this....

but hey....ignorance is bliss. Some people get stuck in their own lil world about why THEIR hair isn't long, and why others look the way they do to make that person feel better. You live, learn and laugh

 

[Evolving78]

Sounds like me and my mom last night!!!

I showed a clip on youtube of this woman who had incredible hair. She was showing her ayuverdic regiment. She showed her hair being flat iron and her hair was long. Mom concluded that she was mixed. I could tell by looking at her wasen't mixed and her hair looked like mine. I knew her hair looked impeccable cause she has an execellent hair regiment. Mom said no she is mixed! I was so not happy. Deep Inside I felt like showing that clip was just asking for a bunch of problems. I'm more relunctant of showing any hair clips or hair info.

I did wrote my mom a hair regiment. Did about 20 copies. Guess what, Mom never used one of the product I bought her. When I asked her why, she said it would take too much time.

Then, when my brother comes around she mumbles that I hide things from her and that I have regiments. . That is why I'm reluctant to tell her stuff nowadays.

girl, that would upset me, but the proof is in the pudding! you need to show your mother by example. give yourself a year and i bet she will be all in your face wanting to know how you did it.

 

[thaidreams]

I understand your frustration, but the only way these stereo types are going to change is by educating people like we do here on this forum. It will not happen over night, but things can change. Keep growing your hair and do like so many others out there and prove those stereo types wrong!

 

[caribeandiva]

You can't change people. Ignore unimformed people and keep it moving. Otherwise you will be like this everytime: .

 

[drjo91]

Its ignorance. Something that will take some time to change. Although, the truth is that a lot of WOMEN do wear a lot of weaves!! So people think that just because one wears a weave that EVERYBODY does it.

 

[Kurlee]

some people will never be able to let go of the "slave mentality"

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

I didn't know this topic had been beaten to death on this board. Ooops..

Well, I was just venting anyway. I didn't mean for a heated/serious debate to ensue or anything. I just get so tired and frustrated over the ignorance sometimes. And it's not so much the fact that they think that "black hair" can't grow. Because even I had that stereotype in my mind before I became more educated about hair growth, read hair books, and joined the LHCF.

It's the fact that people seem to believe this stereotype, AND that they don't seem to want to open up to the possibility that perhaps (perhaps!) black women CAN grow long hair! That's what burns me up the most. That people believe one thing, but aren't even open to another way of thinking.

*sigh* Oh well...like you all mention, you can't change people's thoughts or belief systems. I should just ignore their ignorance and keep it moving!

Thanks for letting me vent.

 

[Barbara]

Don't say anything. I didn't years ago. Just let them see the results.

 

[glamazon386]

The more things change the more they stay the same and at some point IDK why we even bring ourselves to care.....

 

[bermudabeauty]

No offense OP but you did the same thing. When you stated that you "took some quick observation". Looks like you were trying to see if it was a weave yourself. Instead of merely admiring the hair, real or not, and kept it moving. Most of us are guilty of it. We just do the "weave check" as second nature. Truth is we never really know if someone's hair is there's or not, they can have added pieces in the back or whatever. Only the wearer of the hair will ever know, we can only speculate. What we do know here at LHCF ,that no matter the skin color, hair texture we can all achieve great lengths. You go ahead and prove the haters and disbelievers wrong and grow your ish out! LOL

 

[username12]

I feel you, OP. I hear this ALOT from the black community, especially from the small hick country town my parents are from. That's why 95% of the black women's hair in my parent's town is so chewed up, they don't want to listen. At least we, as a community, are making some progres, but there are still too many of "us" who think like your mom.

 

[Prose Princess]

Ugh....why do black women say this??

Okay here's what happened...

Me, my mom, and a friend of mine stopped at the gas station on our way somewhere today, and I got out to go buy something. While inside, I noticed that this black woman had beautiful long healthy-looking hair. I'm talking at least bra-strap length, shiny, thick from-root-to-tip hair! I was admiring her hair, and after some quick investigation (hehe... ) I deduced that this was indeed her REAL hair. I've gotten pretty good at being able to tell these days.

Well, when I got back to the car my mom saw the woman inside of the gas station store walking around, and here's how the conversation went:

Mom: "Oh look at her weave" (chuckle)
Me: "Actually, I believe that was her hair"
Mom: "Oh yeah right...her hair is a weave and you know it!"
Me: "Umm...no, I actually saw her up close and I'm pretty sure that's her hair."
Mom: "Not with hair that long and shiny"
Me: (shaking my head in disbelief @ her comments)

THEN the woman walks out of the store, and my friend (who's a licenced beautician by the way) quips up and says:

Friend: "Yep...that's all her hair...I can tell"
Me: "SEE! I told you!! Sandra (my friend) would know because she's a licensed beautician! Believe it or not, there are SOME black women who have long hair like that"
Friend: "Yeah, but she was light-skinned though"
Me: *silence*

Okay, this whole interaction that took place in the car just made me so furious!! If only my mom, my friend, and black women in general could take a look at some of the pictures of beautiful heads of hair here on this board, they would be shocked!! I'm talking about even DARKER-skinned women (imagine that!) having long, thick, gorgeous natural hair!!

Ugh...I just dont' understand why we as a people in general seem to believe the hype that black women can't grow hair long, and if they DO have long hair, they have to be "light-skinned".

Not only that but as if that wasn't bad enough, my uncle came over to visit the other day, and my aunt was telling a story about a black co-worker of hers that has "long hair down to her waist", that she always keeps in a pony-tail. I'm telling you, before my aunt could even finish telling her story, my uncle interrupts saying: "She's black?? With waist-length hair??" Looking all perplexed and surprised. Then my aunt says: "Well, I think she has some hispanic in her..."

I'm just sitting there thinking..."why??"

What happened today has just STRENGTHENED my resolve even more to grow my hair as long as I can get it! I'll show them!

Thanks for listening to me vent... I had to blow off some steam...

Lol! I'm sorry but this was really funny to me. Like every frustrating thing about black hair stereotypes that we cover in this forum, you experienced within a few days of each other lol.

 

[coconow2007]

I think one thing we keep forgetting - white women have been wearing weaves forever and a day. No one seems to remember this - their's just blends better...

 

[SmartyPants]

My mom laughs at me when I tell her I am growing my hair waist length...

(S)he who laughs last!!!!

 

[shae101s]

Ugh....why do black women say this??

Okay here's what happened...

Me, my mom, and a friend of mine stopped at the gas station on our way somewhere today, and I got out to go buy something. While inside, I noticed that this black woman had beautiful long healthy-looking hair. I'm talking at least bra-strap length, shiny, thick from-root-to-tip hair! I was admiring her hair, and after some quick investigation (hehe... ) I deduced that this was indeed her REAL hair. I've gotten pretty good at being able to tell these days.

Well, when I got back to the car my mom saw the woman inside of the gas station store walking around, and here's how the conversation went:

Mom: "Oh look at her weave" (chuckle)
Me: "Actually, I believe that was her hair"
Mom: "Oh yeah right...her hair is a weave and you know it!"
Me: "Umm...no, I actually saw her up close and I'm pretty sure that's her hair."
Mom: "Not with hair that long and shiny"
Me: (shaking my head in disbelief @ her comments)

THEN the woman walks out of the store, and my friend (who's a licenced beautician by the way) quips up and says:

Friend: "Yep...that's all her hair...I can tell"
Me: "SEE! I told you!! Sandra (my friend) would know because she's a licensed beautician! Believe it or not, there are SOME black women who have long hair like that"
Friend: "Yeah, but she was light-skinned though"
Me: *silence*

Okay, this whole interaction that took place in the car just made me so furious!! If only my mom, my friend, and black women in general could take a look at some of the pictures of beautiful heads of hair here on this board, they would be shocked!! I'm talking about even DARKER-skinned women (imagine that!) having long, thick, gorgeous natural hair!!

Ugh...I just dont' understand why we as a people in general seem to believe the hype that black women can't grow hair long, and if they DO have long hair, they have to be "light-skinned".

Not only that but as if that wasn't bad enough, my uncle came over to visit the other day, and my aunt was telling a story about a black co-worker of hers that has "long hair down to her waist", that she always keeps in a pony-tail. I'm telling you, before my aunt could even finish telling her story, my uncle interrupts saying: "She's black?? With waist-length hair??" Looking all perplexed and surprised. Then my aunt says: "Well, I think she has some hispanic in her..."

I'm just sitting there thinking..."why??"

What happened today has just STRENGTHENED my resolve even more to grow my hair as long as I can get it! I'll show them!

Thanks for listening to me vent... I had to blow off some steam...

I vent right along with you...It's really dumb that people think because you're dark skinned, or black you can't have LONG hair? Like are you kidding me? Why must we be "mixed" in order to have long hair? Or supposedly be using weaves? It's so hurtful and dumb...Before I relaxed my hair and cut it all off to go back natural. I remember about 7 years ago, my mom gave me what she thought was a relaxer, more like a texturizer, my hair was bra-clasp length, being Jamaican, everyone I knew and people I didn't know would all come up to me, pull my hair, and stare in amazement and say "it can't be her hair" because apparently it was not possible to have long hair and a dark skinned child? I am not mix and yes my hair now is short, but I sure a heck plan to grow to waist length and beyond!!! Screw society's twisted logics? smh! (sorry I just vented too).
p.s you know what's funny, ever since my relaxers (the recent one) and even with it being long, I still remember thinking how my hair can't grow long because I believed people's lie about black girls can't have long hair, so I'd let my hair stay at apl...??? wow?!!? NO more baby!! COming with a vengance...

 

[CurlyMoo]

Ugh....why do black women say this??

Okay here's what happened...

Me, my mom, and a friend of mine stopped at the gas station on our way somewhere today, and I got out to go buy something. While inside, I noticed that this black woman had beautiful long healthy-looking hair. I'm talking at least bra-strap length, shiny, thick from-root-to-tip hair! I was admiring her hair, and after some quick investigation (hehe... ) I deduced that this was indeed her REAL hair. I've gotten pretty good at being able to tell these days.

Well, when I got back to the car my mom saw the woman inside of the gas station store walking around, and here's how the conversation went:

Mom: "Oh look at her weave" (chuckle)
Me: "Actually, I believe that was her hair"
Mom: "Oh yeah right...her hair is a weave and you know it!"
Me: "Umm...no, I actually saw her up close and I'm pretty sure that's her hair."
Mom: "Not with hair that long and shiny"
Me: (shaking my head in disbelief @ her comments)

THEN the woman walks out of the store, and my friend (who's a licenced beautician by the way) quips up and says:

Friend: "Yep...that's all her hair...I can tell"
Me: "SEE! I told you!! Sandra (my friend) would know because she's a licensed beautician! Believe it or not, there are SOME black women who have long hair like that"
Friend: "Yeah, but she was light-skinned though"
Me: *silence*

Okay, this whole interaction that took place in the car just made me so furious!! If only my mom, my friend, and black women in general could take a look at some of the pictures of beautiful heads of hair here on this board, they would be shocked!! I'm talking about even DARKER-skinned women (imagine that!) having long, thick, gorgeous natural hair!!

Ugh...I just dont' understand why we as a people in general seem to believe the hype that black women can't grow hair long, and if they DO have long hair, they have to be "light-skinned".

Not only that but as if that wasn't bad enough, my uncle came over to visit the other day, and my aunt was telling a story about a black co-worker of hers that has "long hair down to her waist", that she always keeps in a pony-tail. I'm telling you, before my aunt could even finish telling her story, my uncle interrupts saying: "She's black?? With waist-length hair??" Looking all perplexed and surprised. Then my aunt says: "Well, I think she has some hispanic in her..."

I'm just sitting there thinking..."why??"

What happened today has just STRENGTHENED my resolve even more to grow my hair as long as I can get it! I'll show them!

Thanks for listening to me vent... I had to blow off some steam...

I understand your frustration, however you are fighting an uphill battle. The world is not going to change it's view of Black womens ability to grow long hair overnight. Not even in the next 5 years, thanks to Black women themselves who continue to wear weave over the choice of wearing their own hair. FYI, I don't care what women of other races are wearing because they are sane and smart enough to wear fake hair that is close to their natural texture. Whereas as Black women will wear the blonde straight weave with curly dark roots. And the fact that when Black women do wear the convincing weave they tend to be very upfront about what is going on with thier heads even when not asked. No one needs to know.

The only thing you can do is spread the word on how to grow healthier, longer & stronger hair. Then gradually people will get the message. But my advice would be to stop the weave check and just admire what you see, I know it's hard when you love long hair, growing your own hair long and read these treads often. But try to just focus on your hair and educating those close to you. Only when you grow your hair to those longer lengths can you begin to educate the public. Because there will be the weave checks (visual or physical) and questions.

P.S. I have done my venting about weave and peoples views and have been called names and totally disrespected like I kicked their cat or something. Yes on this very site, where people should know better. So, I say they can go screw themselves because they only look stupid. LOL

Good luck and RELAX!

 

[Tarae]

I wouldn't even entertain these conversations anymore. People will believe what they want about a black woman's hair, no matter how many fotkis, youtubes, and siggys you show them..

If they want to believe someone is rocking a weave because their hair is shiny, then I'd just smile and nod, then change the subject. I'm not trying to educate anyone about hair unless they want to learn (and most don't).

 

[carletta]

I hate to say it.......but........we as african-americans ( sistas) can be our on worst enemy !!!!!! so sad .