Please be Honest With Me: Stretching Relaxers..

[LocksOfLuV]

I am a weekly washer/deep conditioning girl, who does no combing except to detangle, twice a day moisturizing, and bunning/baggying every day except for the week of my relaxer when I flat iron it to check my progress. I am so by the book.

I was relaxing every 12-14 weeks, and the growth is good as well as the thickness, but I would notice between week 9-10 of the stretch my newgrowth and my texlaxed hair would fight. My hair matts something serious (NO MATTER WHAT CONDITIONER I USE OR HOW I DETANGLE) so that when I finally relax my hair would be so matted (especially from combing the relaxer through my newgrowth) that it would literally take me hours and mass breakage to get it detangled. Last relaxer I had about 2-3 golf size balls of hair.

So I am thinking, should I reduce my stretch time to every 8 weeks, BUT only use heat every other relaxer (every 16 weeks)? Be honest with me, I can take it , do you think that this will have negative reactions to my hair? Is that reason enough to cut down a stretch?

 

[pink_n_green_iz_me]

I've figured out some people absolutely can not stretch. I'm one of them, I can't go longer than 8 weeks without a relaxer, if I do I will have tons of shedding and breakage. I would suggest less heat. Hopefully I've answered your question, if not I'm sure the other ladies on LHCF will be happy to assist you.

 

[Allandra]

Is it the heat or the stretching that makes your hair shed / break?

I know stretching is not for everyone. I used to be able to stretch for 16 weeks. However, my most recent relaxer touch up was at 11 weeks. I had alot of new growth. In 2007, I will no longer be stretching. I'm going to judge by the amount of new growth that I have vs. the number of weeks that has gone by since my last relaxer touch up. I need to see how this works out for me.

 

[calliope]

Hi LocksofLuv,
I'm only about 10 weeks post, but I was having the same line of demarcation battle myself about 3 weeks ago. To be honest, the only product that has helped to combat the matting and tangling and little knot balls on my ends is S Curl. I know that not everyone likes it because it can be kinda wet, but I combat that by only applying it to my roots as I part my hair. I was actually using scissors to cut out my knots when I decided to give my undiluted SCurl (had been using diluted on the ends only) a try and I haven't had a knot or matting since- hope you can find something you like too

 

[Angelicus]

I am able to strech because I wash and condition my hair in sections (at least 5). I use the crown and glory method to wash my hair.

 

[atlien11]

Honestly, i think if you are causing more damage by stretching...dont do it. Just my HONEST opinion.

 

[MochaSilk]

I've figured out some people absolutely can not stretch. I'm one of them, I can't go longer than 8 weeks without a relaxer, if I do I will have tons of shedding and breakage. I would suggest less heat. Hopefully I've answered your question, if not I'm sure the other ladies on LHCF will be happy to assist you.

I fully agree. My mom's one as well. She was going to stretch with me, but her new growth was going loco when 7 weeks rolled around. We'll attempt 8 weeks for her next touch-up. Waiting would've done more harm than good.

I'm at 8 weeks now, and it's still manageable for me. We'll see 2-3 weeks from now.

 

[envybeauty]

Stretching is not the only way to achieve length. When I was in school, another sista had the most beautiful mid-back length hair I had ever seen! Admittedly, one day in church, I was mesmorized by her hair such that I remember nothing else about the service other than her hair as I stared at it for hours. Shiny, bouncy, etc.

I was shocked when she said she relaxed it every 6 to 8 weeks herself. Others on this board relax every 8 weeks or so, like Macherieamour. Her hair is georgeous and she has great length.

I don't understand this great need to stretch when (some) women get great results without epic tales of stretching their ng for months on end.

Do what works for you!

 

[LocksOfLuV]

Is it the heat or the stretching that makes your hair shed / break?

I know stretching is not for everyone. I used to be able to stretch for 16 weeks. However, my most recent relaxer touch up was at 11 weeks. I had alot of new growth. In 2007, I will no longer be stretching. I'm going to judge by the amount of new growth that I have vs. the number of weeks that has gone by since my last relaxer touch up. I need to see how this works out for me.

I now only use heat everytime i relax so I know it's not the heat. I know it's stretching but I keep convincing myself that it is 'good for my hair'. The matting is a real trouble while detangling in the relaxing process. If I cut down my stretch until 8 weeks, I will only use heat every 2 relaxers (16 weeks).

 

[LocksOfLuV]

Stretching is not the only way to achieve length. When I was in school, another sista had the most beautiful mid-back length hair I had ever seen! Admittedly, one day in church, I was mesmorized by her hair such that I remember nothing else about the service other than her hair as I stared at it for hours. Shiny, bouncy, etc.

I was shocked when she said she relaxed it every 6 to 8 weeks herself. Others on this board relax every 8 weeks or so, like Macherieamour. Her hair is georgeous and she has great length.

I don't understand this great need to stretch when (some) women get great results without epic tales of stretching their ng for months on end.

Do what works for you!

Very great points, I think I am gonna cut the stretch shorter. Thank ladies!

 

[LocksOfLuV]

Hi LocksofLuv,
I'm only about 10 weeks post, but I was having the same line of demarcation battle myself about 3 weeks ago. To be honest, the only product that has helped to combat the matting and tangling and little knot balls on my ends is S Curl. I know that not everyone likes it because it can be kinda wet, but I combat that by only applying it to my roots as I part my hair. I was actually using scissors to cut out my knots when I decided to give my undiluted SCurl (had been using diluted on the ends only) a try and I haven't had a knot or matting since- hope you can find something you like too

Me and Scurl are enemies, makes my hair too sticky, but my baggied ends love it.

 

[LocksOfLuV]

Honestly, i think if you are causing more damage by stretching...dont do it. Just my HONEST opinion.

Yes ma'am message taken.

 

[january noir]

This post is right on time! I am scheduled to see my stylist tomorrow. I am at 10 weeks post and I think it's time for my touch up. I was going to try and go for 12 weeks. I have been doing 2x washes per week, 1 cowash and the other a poo with deep conditioner and it has been manageable....UNTIL TODAY! LAWD is my hair nappy! I ran to the CVS to get some S-Curl. I hope it will help. I will get my relaxer tomorrow but will incorporate S-Curl for future stretches to see how it works.

 

[Allandra]

I now only use heat everytime i relax so I know it's not the heat. I know it's stretching but I keep convincing myself that it is 'good for my hair'. The matting is a real trouble while detangling in the relaxing process. If I cut down my stretch until 8 weeks, I will only use heat every 2 relaxers (16 weeks).

Why don't you base it on the amount of new growth you have? This is what I'm going to do (starting in 2007). I know I can no longer go 16 weeks like I used to do. I feel comfortable going by the amount of new growth I have (since this is what I did in the past and it worked for me). Hmph. Don't ask me why I stopped, because I haven't a clue.

 

[imani97]

I love this post. I viewed myself as a failure because I relaxed today before scheduled, 14 weeks. I was trying to shoot for 18. I was just looking so bad and the Dominicans couldn't even do anything w/ my hair. I've figured out that the most important practice for me will be not relaxing my hair 100% straight.

 

[LocksOfLuV]

Why don't you base it on the amount of new growth you have? This is what I'm going to do (starting in 2007). I know I can no longer go 16 weeks like I used to do. I feel comfortable going by the amount of new growth I have (since this is what I did in the past and it worked for me). Hmph. Don't ask me why I stopped, because I haven't a clue.

Your're right. I just feel like sometimes I have to have everything in a set schedule , I know, but I will def. try that method.

January, I am glad that this thread helps you too.

 

[LocksOfLuV]

I love this post. I viewed myself as a failure because I relaxed today before scheduled, 14 weeks. I was trying to shoot for 18. I was just looking so bad and the Dominicans couldn't even do anything w/ my hair. I've figured out that the most important practice for me will be not relaxing my hair 100% straight.

I can so indentify witht hat feeling, like you let your hair down. I kept telling myself to 'suck it up and stop whinning' but i can't do that. It will make it unecessarily hard on myself. But 14 weeks was a GREAT stretch. You should pat yourself on the back.

How did the relaxer come out? Was the stretch beneficial for your hair?

 

[Allandra]

Your're right. I just feel like sometimes I have to have everything in a set schedule , I know, but I will def. try that method.

January, I am glad that this thread helps you too.

I'm so anal, I always feel like things in my life have to be on a set schedule. I'm glad I'm not alone.

 

[dany06]

I understand what you are going through. My cousin Jasmine, age 11, has thick tangley mid-back length hair. When it hits time for a relaxer like every 6 to 7 weeks, sometimes less, no one will be able to comb or even get a finger through her hair. Her hair starts to form almost locks at the crown and nape even shortly after detangling. So stretching is out of the picture for her.

Me, on the other hand, can go forever without having a relaxer. The longest I have gone is 17 weeks which was in late September. Im thinking about getting another relaxer sometime this Thanksgiving break. I relaxed because I didn't like the lack of shine in my hair. I had little to know shedding while stretching. But when I got my relaxer I had lots of shedding for about 2 weeks and my hair looked rather limp. Maybe next time I'll try texlaxing

All in all, dont kill yourself and your hair trying to reach some goal that seems detrimental. As with all advice on this forum, everything doesn't necessarily apply to you. You are a unique individual which means that one technique that may work for someone else might not work for you. So you just do what you feel is right.

 

[SpiritJunkie]

i am glad you started this thread. I'm on week 8 right now and I washed my hair last night and what a hot mess it was. tangles knots...and I'm aiming for 12 weeks.

I think i am going to nip this in the bud and relax next week which will be 9 weeks.

 

[SweetCaramel1]

if you're matting and knotting then forget about the stretch.

 

[sassygurl]

I have a problem with tangles when i get to about 11 weeks post. I have to use Porosity Control and Matrix Sleek Conditioner to be able to comb through my hair. HTH

 

[cocoberry10]

I am a weekly washer/deep conditioning girl, who does no combing except to detangle, twice a day moisturizing, and bunning/baggying every day except for the week of my relaxer when I flat iron it to check my progress. I am so by the book.

I was relaxing every 12-14 weeks, and the growth is good as well as the thickness, but I would notice between week 9-10 of the stretch my newgrowth and my texlaxed hair would fight. My hair matts something serious (NO MATTER WHAT CONDITIONER I USE OR HOW I DETANGLE) so that when I finally relax my hair would be so matted (especially from combing the relaxer through my newgrowth) that it would literally take me hours and mass breakage to get it detangled. Last relaxer I had about 2-3 golf size balls of hair.

So I am thinking, should I reduce my stretch time to every 8 weeks, BUT only use heat every other relaxer (every 16 weeks)? Be honest with me, I can take it , do you think that this will have negative reactions to my hair? Is that reason enough to cut down a stretch?

I agree with the other ladies posts. Not everyone can stretch. I just stretched 14 weeks (almost 15), and while I had a lot of new growth, I feel like I should have relaxed at least 2-4 weeks before. I had a little more breakage and matting than I thought was necessary.

I would say test it out. See if you can go for 10 weeks without major matting and then retouch. If that works, then you know you can stretch that long. If not, maybe the longest you can wait is 8 weeks, or 6 weeks. The point is to find what works for you. The purpose of stretching is to have enough new growth to prevent overlapping the relaxer over already processed hair.

I think this time, I'm going to retouch at 8-10 weeks myself, so I'll let you know.

 

[cocoberry10]

Almost forgot this! Also, if you are finding that the matting/knotting is causing breakage, and you don't want to stretch, BUT you don't feel like you have enough/a lot of new growth, you can...

1. Leave the relaxer on for a shorter amount of time--Even if it overlaps, it won't do as much damage.

2. Relax in sections (especially if you do your own relaxer), because you can really see your new growth and control how much relaxer you put on, and how long it stays on the new growth, etc.

 

[caribeandiva]

sweetie, if stretching your relaxers is doing more harm than good then cut back to 8 or 10 weeks. it shouldn't have any adverse reactions on your hair.

 

[star]

Hi LocksofLuv,
I'm only about 10 weeks post, but I was having the same line of demarcation battle myself about 3 weeks ago. To be honest, the only product that has helped to combat the matting and tangling and little knot balls on my ends is S Curl. I know that not everyone likes it because it can be kinda wet, but I combat that by only applying it to my roots as I part my hair. I was actually using scissors to cut out my knots when I decided to give my undiluted SCurl (had been using diluted on the ends only) a try and I haven't had a knot or matting since- hope you can find something you like too

Stretching really and trully works for me and I co-signing on S-Curl. I spray the roots and my hair unbeliveable tangle free I am at 22 weeks but I have had it in braids most of the time and cannot wait to get my relaxer in a few weeks. Know your hair for me relaxer too close gave me thin ends, hair was long but thin.

 

[shunta]

Honestly, i think if you are causing more damage by stretching...dont do it. Just my HONEST opinion.

This is exactly how I feel

 

[imani97]

I can so indentify witht hat feeling, like you let your hair down. I kept telling myself to 'suck it up and stop whinning' but i can't do that. It will make it unecessarily hard on myself. But 14 weeks was a GREAT stretch. You should pat yourself on the back.

How did the relaxer come out? Was the stretch beneficial for your hair?

It came out nicely. I'll be updating my album next week sometime. I'm finally touching BSL I believe so that was great. I am wondering if my edges are breaking in the front though b/c of stretching too long.

 

[cocoberry10]

It came out nicely. I'll be updating my album next week sometime. I'm finally touching BSL I believe so that was great. I am wondering if my edges are breaking in the front though b/c of stretching too long.

I'm having that same problem. The front is always more tangly, and the back is softer. The texture in the back is more 4a/3c, so I think that's why.

 

[preciousjewel76]

Before this forum, I was relaxing exactly every 6 weeks. I had maybe .25-.5 inch of new growth. My poor hair was getting overprocessed and I had no idea! I'm trying to give my hair a break now. I'm 7 weeks post, and I'm going to shoot for an 11 week stretch. I think I can make it because I'm careful to moisturize my NG, and it's pretty soft and manageable. I haven't had more shedding than usual, but I'm getting a little breakage. I don't think that's related to the stretching; I just haven't done a protein treatment in a long time. I think a mild protein treatment this weekend should ease the breakage.

Bottom line: don't stretch if your hair is suffering, it's not worth it.