HELP!!!!! Very Frustrated with natural hair

[determineddiva]

Ok i need some serious help. I have been wearing sew ins for at least the past 5-6 months . Im seeing some growth but my hair is very thin. It almost feels thinner than when i had a relaxer. My edges and almost temple are very thin down to the scalp. Im getting so worried that maybe going natural isnt for me? Im so frustrated!!!! I have not had a relaxer for 1 .5 yr and as far as thicker nope , once i flat iron my hair it is really thin. i have used mega tek , BJCO, nioxin you name it . Any suggestions would help. I have nioxin system for thin hair, i have miss jessies products, used suave,shea butter etc. tired of buying products. I exercise regularly, eat healthy , drink lots of water, take multivitamins. Im at my wits end with my hair. Im thinking about going back to relaxer, but scared. Please some advice


Thanks in Advance

 

[Solitude]

It's not your natural hair causing the problem. It's the braids from the sew-ins thinning your edges. Most likely, a relaxer will only thin your hair/edges out more, especially if you continue to wear the sew-ins.

 

[kblc06]

How are you taking care of your hair while under the weave? Do you give your hair a rest in between sew-ins? Also have you consulted a dermatologist, because there might be something wrong internally if you're experiencing excessive shedding

 

[Shananyganz]

^^^^^ I think those would be helpful things to know. In addition, do you wear a net with your sew-in? Do you use extension hair to reinforce your braid? How tightly is the base braided? Are they full/partial sew-ins? Length of time you keep your install? Are you fully natural or just transitioning?

I know personally, that I have to take breaks in between my protective styles (sew-ins and braids) to allow my edges and nape to rest. In addition, when I have sew-ins. I leave my nape and edges out, so I am free to moisturize and baby them. While in braids, I am careful not to braid too tightly and the moment they loosen up/grow out, I rebraid to avoid the braid hair "hanging" from my strands. I have seen a difference in the thickness and overall health of those areas.

A relaxer at this point might not solve what you are going through. Based on the information provided, it is hard to ascertain what the "issue" may be. Have you considered that maybe you have naturally thin hair? Sometimes there is that misconception that natural hair means overall thicker hair and for some, that is just not the case.

I think it would be best to ponder some of the questions presented in the response posts thus far to entertain possible causes for the thinning edge and temple area, then troubleshoot from there.

~S~

 

[determineddiva]

How are you taking care of your hair while under the weave? Do you give your hair a rest in between sew-ins? Also have you consulted a dermatologist, because there might be something wrong internally if you're experiencing excessive shedding

When wearing sew-ins i keep my edges and nape out. I try to keep my hair moisturized and i wash hair if keeping sew-in for more than two weeks. I usually let my hair rest for a week before putting back in sew-in. Because i work out 5-6 days a week sew in is "what i thought" would be my best option. I know micros would not work for my edges. I may make an appointment with dermatologist . I have always had long medium thickness hair ( not real thick).
Thanks for replying.

 

[Filmatic]

When wearing sew-ins i keep my edges and nape out. I try to keep my hair moisturized and i wash hair if keeping sew-in for more than two weeks. I usually let my hair rest for a week before putting back in sew-in. Because i work out 5-6 days a week sew in is "what i thought" would be my best option. I know micros would not work for my edges. I may make an appointment with dermatologist . I have always had long medium thickness hair ( not real thick).
Thanks for replying.

Are you straightening the hair that is out? If so that may be a culprit also. Maybe you should take a break from weave period to get down to the problem. A week may not be a long enough break for your hair.

 

[BlackMasterPiece]

It's not your natural hair causing the problem. It's the braids from the sew-ins thinning your edges. Most likely, a relaxer will only thin your hair/edges out more, especially if you continue to wear the sew-ins.

BINGO. From the sounds of things the sew-ins are doing your hair no favors and doing a number on your edges.

I would take the sew-in down and really start to learn to care for my natural hair. There are great styles for ladies that work out often. I think you need to learn ways to care for your natural hair without a sew-in.....they're not for everyone.

 

[determineddiva]

Are you straightening the hair that is out? If so that may be a culprit also. Maybe you should take a break from weave period to get down to the problem. A week may not be a long enough break for your hair.

No I dont straighten the hair that is left out. Yeah I may have to leave my hair out longer.

Thanks

 

[determineddiva]

BINGO. From the sounds of things the sew-ins are doing your hair no favors and doing a number on your edges.

I would take the sew-in down and really start to learn to care for my natural hair. There are great styles for ladies that work out often. I think you need to learn ways to care for your natural hair without a sew-in.....they're not for everyone.

Hello,

Thanks for the advice. Do you have any suggestions? Like I stated before working out 5-6 days a week and working in corporate setting I dont know what to do with my hair. Even flat ironing it once a week and wrapping it doesnt look that great. Im open to suggestions

Thanks

 

[L.Brown1114]

you have to listen to your hair, my hair HATES being braided and thrives on wash n go's. i cant really do sew ins so i opt for lace wigs and half wigs. just try giving your hair a break and letting your edges grow back with some growth aids and wigs. i know some people say they dont like wearing them but thats cuz they cant find the right one! if u need any suggestions i can help you out im the wig queen

 

[determineddiva]

^^^^^ I think those would be helpful things to know. In addition, do you wear a net with your sew-in? Do you use extension hair to reinforce your braid? How tightly is the base braided? Are they full/partial sew-ins? Length of time you keep your install? Are you fully natural or just transitioning?

I know personally, that I have to take breaks in between my protective styles (sew-ins and braids) to allow my edges and nape to rest. In addition, when I have sew-ins. I leave my nape and edges out, so I am free to moisturize and baby them. While in braids, I am careful not to braid too tightly and the moment they loosen up/grow out, I rebraid to avoid the braid hair "hanging" from my strands. I have seen a difference in the thickness and overall health of those areas.

A relaxer at this point might not solve what you are going through. Based on the information provided, it is hard to ascertain what the "issue" may be. Have you considered that maybe you have naturally thin hair? Sometimes there is that misconception that natural hair means overall thicker hair and for some, that is just not the case.

I think it would be best to ponder some of the questions presented in the response posts thus far to entertain possible causes for the thinning edge and temple area, then troubleshoot from there.


~S~

Hello,

No I dont wear a net with my sew-in, no extension hair to reinforce the braids.. Will this help? Braids are not tight because Im very tinder headed. I have been wearing full head sew in the past two times i have gotten one. I usually leave in no longer than 3weeks, mostly 2 weeks at a time.

I only have about 1inch left to be fully natural. I will think about all the things presented to me. Open to any suggestions

Thanks

 

[MyAngelEyez~C~U]

It's not your natural hair causing the problem. It's the braids from the sew-ins thinning your edges. Most likely, a relaxer will only thin your hair/edges out more, especially if you continue to wear the sew-ins.

yep, what she said

 

[BlackMasterPiece]

Hello,

Thanks for the advice. Do you have any suggestions? Like I stated before working out 5-6 days a week and working in corporate setting I dont know what to do with my hair. Even flat ironing it once a week and wrapping it doesnt look that great. Im open to suggestions

Thanks

I'm not sure of you're fully natural or still have relaxed ends but if you're fully natural I highly recommend mini twists. I've had mine in over two weeks and I've co-washed or washed almost every day. Pixie braids are the same way...both have great lasting power and hold up wonderfully to daily washes/co-washes.

 

[Iluvsmuhgrass]

I don't want to confuse you because I know that you're frustrated already and this thread has a good bit of information to absorb. So I'm going to post what I think, then tell you what helps me. I am not a natural hair guru at all. I am just learning what works for my hair.


1. I agree with the other ladies here. I think it's the weaves and braids that are hurting you... along with the washing. You could have buildup that's making your hair angry. I know some people here will disagree with me, but when I wear a weave I don't wash my hair with it. I make sure my hair is well moisturized then braided but not too tight. Once the install is completed, I cleanse my scalp with witch hazel on cotton balls every 2-5 days. I use a light oil with a few drops of tea tree oil or braid spray on my hair and scalp. Why? Because my hair likes to be left alone. I'll do a light wash on the ends of the weave hair if need be but I leave mine alone. When I tried to wash the entire thing (my grass included) I had a mess on my hands.

2. For me moisture is key. I do co-washes and wng's. My hair co-washes like nobody's business. My hair also likes a light protein. It can be difficult to balance it out but have patience.

3. You might be using too much stuff on your hair. I went from bandwagon to bandwagon always looking for the next best thing and that's not always what's best for your hair (or your pocketbook lol.) You may have to use a product for a while and alter HOW you use it to discover the best effects. (For instance, I tried all this crap and my hair ended up loving rosewater/glycerin and condish/rosewater/glycerin mixes. I jumped on the NO GLYCERIN OMG bandwagon and my hair rebelled. Here I was still trying to follow that when I just thought.... ok forget this. I'm using what I know and all was right with the world lol.) Figure out what your hair likes and stick with it.

4. I don't think that natural hair is super hard to care for. We just have to understand it, have patience, and give it what it likes. I've learned so much from alot of the awesome natural ladies here, but I've also learned to tweak it so that it works for me. When I first watched a YT video of a young lady with a gorgeous wng she said that she didn't comb her hair. I just thought erplexed Are ya serious? How? lol Uh how bout no. And one day it just clicked.... so now, I don't really comb my hair either. My fingers are my primary comb. I'm a 4a/b with coils, cotton, and some weird wavy suff lol and when my hair is moist and happy, detangling is a breeze!!! I expected it to be alot harder than it is (due to a bad past experience when I had to do a mandatory BC due to chemical damage) but moisture keeps my hair from doing horrendous things.

5. Don't panic. I've learned that when you get frustrated you're more apt to be rough with your hair and that only makes the damage worse. Find something to do, leave your hair alone... and when you're calm, go back to it and treat it gently. You're going to have to nurse it back to good health.

HTH (I know I kind of rambled a bit.. sorry about that lol)

 

[cinnespice]

I have been natural for close to 2 years. I was wearing weaves back to back. I washed my hair and the weave. I oiled it and took care of it. And although my hair was growing, my edges were thining alot. I had to think of something and i didn't want to go back to braids. So i go over my fear of wigs. And it's the greatest thing ever. I can care for my natural hair underneath my wig and the edges are back. Sometimes you just need to give you hair a rest. Pluse it saves me money which is a good thing.
I will go back to weave for my b-day trip in oct. But until then i think it's wigs.

 

[determineddiva]

I have been natural for close to 2 years. I was wearing weaves back to back. I washed my hair and the weave. I oiled it and took care of it. And although my hair was growing, my edges were thining alot. I had to think of something and i didn't want to go back to braids. So i go over my fear of wigs. And it's the greatest thing ever. I can care for my natural hair underneath my wig and the edges are back. Sometimes you just need to give you hair a rest. Pluse it saves me money which is a good thing.
I will go back to weave for my b-day trip in oct. But until then i think it's wigs.

I have decided to do half wigs . That way i can take off nightly. Just have to make sure I secure them well , for working out...

 

[Mook's hair]

It's not your natural hair causing the problem. It's the braids from the sew-ins thinning your edges. Most likely, a relaxer will only thin your hair/edges out more, especially if you continue to wear the sew-ins.

Yup, I agree. Sew-ins are killer on natural hair IMO..

If you feel that natural hair is not for you and you were having an easier time being relaxed, then you should go ahead and consider making a change and doing what will be best for you in your ability to care for your hair.

 

[determineddiva]

you have to listen to your hair, my hair HATES being braided and thrives on wash n go's. i cant really do sew ins so i opt for lace wigs and half wigs. just try giving your hair a break and letting your edges grow back with some growth aids and wigs. i know some people say they dont like wearing them but thats cuz they cant find the right one! if u need any suggestions i can help you out im the wig queen

Can you please help me with picking a wig? Looking for one that looks natural and not super fake . Thanks in Advance.You can see my hair this is from DEC 2009 it has grown out . I have to take another pic to show you the real condition of my hair now

http://public.fotki.com/determineddiva/

 

[determineddiva]

I don't want to confuse you because I know that you're frustrated already and this thread has a good bit of information to absorb. So I'm going to post what I think, then tell you what helps me. I am not a natural hair guru at all. I am just learning what works for my hair.


1. I agree with the other ladies here. I think it's the weaves and braids that are hurting you... along with the washing. You could have buildup that's making your hair angry. I know some people here will disagree with me, but when I wear a weave I don't wash my hair with it. I make sure my hair is well moisturized then braided but not too tight. Once the install is completed, I cleanse my scalp with witch hazel on cotton balls every 2-5 days. I use a light oil with a few drops of tea tree oil or braid spray on my hair and scalp. Why? Because my hair likes to be left alone. I'll do a light wash on the ends of the weave hair if need be but I leave mine alone. When I tried to wash the entire thing (my grass included) I had a mess on my hands.

2. For me moisture is key. I do co-washes and wng's. My hair co-washes like nobody's business. My hair also likes a light protein. It can be difficult to balance it out but have patience.

3. You might be using too much stuff on your hair. I went from bandwagon to bandwagon always looking for the next best thing and that's not always what's best for your hair (or your pocketbook lol.) You may have to use a product for a while and alter HOW you use it to discover the best effects. (For instance, I tried all this crap and my hair ended up loving rosewater/glycerin and condish/rosewater/glycerin mixes. I jumped on the NO GLYCERIN OMG bandwagon and my hair rebelled. Here I was still trying to follow that when I just thought.... ok forget this. I'm using what I know and all was right with the world lol.) Figure out what your hair likes and stick with it.

4. I don't think that natural hair is super hard to care for. We just have to understand it, have patience, and give it what it likes. I've learned so much from alot of the awesome natural ladies here, but I've also learned to tweak it so that it works for me. When I first watched a YT video of a young lady with a gorgeous wng she said that she didn't comb her hair. I just thought erplexed Are ya serious? How? lol Uh how bout no. And one day it just clicked.... so now, I don't really comb my hair either. My fingers are my primary comb. I'm a 4a/b with coils, cotton, and some weird wavy suff lol and when my hair is moist and happy, detangling is a breeze!!! I expected it to be alot harder than it is (due to a bad past experience when I had to do a mandatory BC due to chemical damage) but moisture keeps my hair from doing horrendous things.

5. Don't panic. I've learned that when you get frustrated you're more apt to be rough with your hair and that only makes the damage worse. Find something to do, leave your hair alone... and when you're calm, go back to it and treat it gently. You're going to have to nurse it back to good health.

HTH (I know I kind of rambled a bit.. sorry about that lol)

http://public.fotki.com/determineddiva/ you can see what the condition of my hair looks like just a little longer now

 

[shamarie]

I had the same problem when i was wearing my sew ins for growth. I think my problem was I that I was taking my sew ins out weekly to wash and condition. Its a catch 22 with me cause, if I leave it in too long my hair scalp becomes riddled with dandruff and is hard to manage. So now i only sew in for style when I want too. Which is not that often these days.

 

[Austro-Afrikana]

I don't think it's the actual canerows but the thread rubbing up against the hair and cutting it. The first time I ever got a weave a few years ago, after I took it out my hair was so much thinner. I used to get canerows all the time and never had that problem.
I think you should think of an alternative protective style. Maybe just the canerows or some braids with extensions.

 

[determineddiva]

I wanted to thank everyone for their suggestion and encouragement. This is a true journey and I'm just grateful that I have found LHCF. You ladies are the best.

God Bless

 

[Carrie A]

What ever is going on I don't think relaxing is the solution. In fact I know relaxing is not the solution to thin hair. Why not try henna conditioning treatments and just wear your hair out for a while?