Why insult our people for not undersanding how to take care of their hair?

[Blue_Berry]

A while back ago, I was looking at a youtuber video how she put a relaxer in her daughter hair. One of the comments was against this process. I am also against it too, but the comment was rude. I couldn't exactly remember the comment, but it had profanity in it and it was talking about the way she was doing her hair. Some other comments was bashing it as well. I felt offend when I looked at the other comments. Come on people we have to admit before finding this forum we were all ignorant about how to take care, grow and maintain our hair. The relaxing pattern has been pass down from generation. I agree that you shouldn't put a relaxer on your child hair, but I think these people don't understand cause of their experience in life. They go by what they were taught at a young age. I don't think it seems right to bash someone for their lack of knowledge. I think it's more helpful to teach them what their doing wrong and what they should know, so they can have increase of understanding.

Ladies, why all the rude comments on youtube? Why don't we teach our people instead of insulting them.

I don't mean to offend anyone.

 

[VirtuousBeauty]

It's not just the black community that does this. People like to hide behind their computer and say what they wouldn't have the balls to say to someone's face most of the time. Some people are intentionally negative for this purpose.

As far as the black community we still have a ways to go. Not everyone is taught to speak their minds without being disrespectful.

 

[justicefighter1913]

deleted...

 

[miss stress]

People on the internet r just rude in general like the above poster pointed out but if ure afraid of wht people r gonna say to u on the internet or u dont have a keep it movin attitude, it would b in your best intrest to simply aviod putting yourself online.

 

[DDTexlaxed]

Some feel more superior because they are natural. I call these types natural Nazis. Very prideful and full of hurtful words. They can kill a person's desire to be natural or their desire to post future You Tube videos. They don't realize or care that words can hurt a person, even sometimes worse than a fist.

 

[DirtyJerzeyGirly]

@ DD, you do realize that there are folks who are relaxed that are against relaxing a young child's hair as well, right? Are they Nazi's as well?

 

[30something]

I always wondered this my self. People get so self righteous just because of the information they founded on the internet.

 

[frida1980]

Youtubers aren't known for their politeness. I spend more time recoiling at comments being offensive than actually watching the clips. But to these posters nothing seems more horrifying than a little girl having those chemicals in them.

Here, things are a lot more civil. That's because people know each other and respect each other. There's a personal touch when you can see one another. In youtube and other websites, commenters are anonymous. Take a step over to yahoo articles, and you'll find LOTS of offensive comments by sigh... anonymous whites.

I recoil at people openly bashing strangers for their hair habits, too. We have to learn how to teach people healthy hair habits without being offensive. Unfortunately, the internet well meaning people give into their rude side. It's pathetic.

 

[Tiye]

I always wondered this my self. People get so self righteous just because of the information they founded on the internet.

This. You can learn stuff here and on other internet resources but I see ppl thinking they know it all because they read it here and that's not possible. Respectfulness is in order. But then again we're talking youtube comments so expect anything and be surprised at nothing - some ppl there are just rude and badly behaved. End of story.

 

[Kindheart]

yeah well that exists in every community ,its just being judgemental .

 

[DaDragonPrincess]

NOTICE most the people that post negative comments on youtube have a blank profile will no picture or videos....


The internet world is open for bullies "NET BULLIES" or "CYBER THUGS" etc...it gives them the chance to hide behind a computer screen and vent/hate/envy people to make theirself feel good...because they don't feel good about theirself...

You have to be careful, this internet aint no joke, people are crazy... you have to BLOCK/DELETE/REPORT these clowns...

I have had to deal with stalkers and net bullies on the internet


If you aren't strong this internet world will tear you down...don't get on these sites that are open to this harsh behavior if you can't handle it, it's just like having a school bully...Their are people that live their life tearing others down and making others feel bad...and they love it.


STICKS AND STONES MAY BREAK MY BONES...BUT WORDS WILL NEVER HURT ME​

 

[DDTexlaxed]

@ DD, you do realize that there are folks who are relaxed that are against relaxing a young child's hair as well, right? Are they Nazi's as well?

From her post, I assumed it was a natural person. You're right about your post, but relaxed people don't usually talk down to other relaxed people. I'm not meaning to offend anyone.
Sad to say, that words do hurt and can hurt.

 

[DirtyJerzeyGirly]

From her post, I assumed it was a natural person. You're right about your post, but relaxed people don't usually talk down to other relaxed people. I'm not meaning to offend anyone.
Sad to say, that words do hurt and can hurt.

Oh it's cool DD I still love ya!

P.S. You hair looks great in your siggy, too!

 

[Yoshi3329]

From her post, I assumed it was a natural person. You're right about your post, but relaxed people don't usually talk down to other relaxed people. I'm not meaning to offend anyone.
Sad to say, that words do hurt and can hurt.

No offense, but you shouldn't assume things. For all we know that woman was relaxed, for all we know it could have been a man, for all we know, it could have been someone who is of a different racial group altogether who is raising a black child.

Some feel more superior because they are natural. I call these types natural Nazis. Very prideful and full of hurtful words. They can kill a person's desire to be natural or their desire to post future You Tube videos. They don't realize or care that words can hurt a person, even sometimes worse than a fist.

I won't even get into the natural Nazi name calling, which actually hurt my feelings. People can be jerks whether they be relaxed or not. How would you like it if I called you a sheep, because you and I disagreed? The whole name calling thing wasn't necessary, it was extremely hurtful. Lastly, how do you know the commentators felt "superior?" erplexedThey could have been shocked, enraged, saddend, or all of the above.

Not trying to start anything, it just that Natural Nazi comment really hurt.

 

[JollyGal]

People have no manners. Its as simple as that.

There are other ways to express yourself.

I always question people who are disrespectful to people who do not understand haircare (or any subject for that matter). Why not help the person? Why insult them?

 

[ThickRoot]

You know what I'm reading these comments right now and folks are saying people hide behind their computers, and Youtubers hide and say nasty things. Please! I have read things on this very board where people have been downright rude and disrespectful. I'm in my 30's and prior to all this new information and exchange of ideas I grew up with grease your scalp a few times a week, wash your hair like once or twice a month (it grows best when dirty), hot combing dirty hair, etc. I know I'm not the only one. As I got older I learned water was my friend, and I needed to DC (a lot for me anyway), and maybe I shouldn't clog my follicles with heavy grease. But co-washing, wet bunning, the ph balance, etc., some of those ideas I didn't know about.

But right now my boyfriend is worried I'm gonna co-wash the hair right off my head. Why? Cause he grew up with a black mother and sisters and that's what he saw and heard. We need to be more tolerant of one another's learning process.

 

[chrisanddonniesmommy]

Rudeness is subjective. To many, just speaking out against something popular is considered rude. In today's world, there's a wealth of information out there. Use it. Be it.

 

[VirtuousBeauty]

You know what I'm reading these comments right now and folks are saying people hide behind their computers, and Youtubers hide and say nasty things. Please! I have read things on this very board where people have been downright rude and disrespectful. I'm in my 30's and prior to all this new information and exchange of ideas I grew up with grease your scalp a few times a week, wash your hair like once or twice a month (it grows best when dirty), hot combing dirty hair, etc. I know I'm not the only one. As I got older I learned water was my friend, and I needed to DC (a lot for me anyway), and maybe I shouldn't clog my follicles with heavy grease. But co-washing, wet bunning, the ph balance, etc., some of those ideas I didn't know about.

But right now my boyfriend is worried I'm gonna co-wash the hair right off my head. Why? Cause he grew up with a black mother and sisters and that's what he saw and heard. We need to be more tolerant of one another's learning process.

I definitely agree

 

[DaDragonPrincess]

Much as I love youtube and the internet...It's not my life...I have a life at the end of the day...I may not agree with some of the stuff I see on youtube/internet but i'm not gone to become an internet bully...

All you ladies have great points.
​

 

[PearlyCurly]

You know what I'm reading these comments right now and folks are saying people hide behind their computers, and Youtubers hide and say nasty things. Please! I have read things on this very board where people have been downright rude and disrespectful. I'm in my 30's and prior to all this new information and exchange of ideas I grew up with grease your scalp a few times a week, wash your hair like once or twice a month (it grows best when dirty), hot combing dirty hair, etc. I know I'm not the only one. As I got older I learned water was my friend, and I needed to DC (a lot for me anyway), and maybe I shouldn't clog my follicles with heavy grease. But co-washing, wet bunning, the ph balance, etc., some of those ideas I didn't know about.

But right now my boyfriend is worried I'm gonna co-wash the hair right off my head. Why? Cause he grew up with a black mother and sisters and that's what he saw and heard. We need to be more tolerant of one another's learning process.

You know whats funny i have never heard of a lot of these black hair myths until i joined this forum. I have never once heard a black person(that i know of course) say if you wash your hair too much it will fall out, only on here

But anyway i know thats kinda off topic ..But, yes i do agree about your post. I have seen some pretty ignorant things on here, especially when there is one person that doesnt agree with the "group"(majority rules right).
And a lot of the "bad" hair videos that be on YT, are usually posted on here by a member, the member usually criticizes their method, and then everybody else does it too, ANDDD usually that thread has a lot of post & views instead of the poor little lady who wants to know how to properly moisturize her hair

 

[DDTexlaxed]

No offense, but you shouldn't assume things. For all we know that woman was relaxed, for all we know it could have been a man, for all we know, it could have been someone who is of a different racial group altogether who is raising a black child.



I won't even get into the natural Nazi name calling, which actually hurt my feelings. People can be jerks whether they be relaxed or not. How would you like it if I called you a sheep, because you and I disagreed? The whole name calling thing wasn't necessary, it was extremely hurtful. Lastly, how do you know the commentators felt "superior?" erplexedThey could have been shocked, enraged, saddend, or all of the above.

Not trying to start anything, it just that Natural Nazi comment really hurt.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend anyone. Especially anyone here. If this has offended anyone else, please know that it was done by accident.

 

[Yoshi3329]

^^^Aww, that's alright. I totally understand where you coming from.

You're totally sweet!

 

[manter26]

I feel the same way as the OP. But I also think it's wrong to post links to youtube videos saying "omg, look at what this person is doing." Then anyone who enters the thread, lurkers and the like, go to the video and lecture that person to death. They've never had over 100 views of a video then all of a sudden they have thousands of views and a 100s of comments bashing them and their practices.

It gets out of hand and if it doesn't overwhelm the video poster, she is a stronger woman than me.

 

[Bella_Atl]

I don't think the rudeness has anything to do with hair. People that post rude comments on Youtube or even on here are just rude people period.

I agree with the earlier poster that some people get bold when they are behind their computers. I call it computer cajones.

I'm sorry but 98% of this board are black women or black/latina. And when I read rude post I just want to chime in and say so bad: "Now you know you d@%n well you would NOT say that to that sista's face."

I'm just sayin...

 

[LittleLuxe]

People who think that their definition of right and wrong is the absolute truth and especially on the internet will get too big for their britches and act excessively rude. I understand some people may not like the fact she is a mother relaxing her daughter's hair but no one has to care for that hair but her. She is putting that information out there for the sake of other mothers who will also wish to relax their daughter's hair.

Amazing new information doesn't always mean people will turn from something they PREFER doing. I don't currently have a daughter, am waaaaaaay too young to dare have a daughter but I really can't say I wouldn't relax her hair after age 8 or so if I desired to. My hair was lovingly cared for by my mom both when it was relaxed and natural so I don't really have negative views on the practice. I think I was blessed because no one gave me any grief regardless of what my hair looked like so I never felt negative about my natural texture or relaxing my strands. We should all put that into practice for younger individuals.

" But I also think it's wrong to post links to youtube videos saying "omg, look at what this person is doing." Then anyone who enters the thread, lurkers and the like, go to the video and lecture that person to death. They've never had over 100 views of a video then all of a sudden they have thousands of views and a 100s of comments bashing them and their practices.

It gets out of hand and if it doesn't overwhelm the video poster, she is a stronger woman than me"

I also agree with this. I think it blows a small incident into a big thing unintentionally.

 

[curlydrea]

People are always jerks when they can hide behind a keyboard.

The thought of putting a relaxer in a childs hair is not a good idea.. but there is a way of telling her that its not the healthy for the childs scalp, etc. I do understand how some of us get upset when we see things like this because there are so many resources and info out there about our hair, yet some of us ignore it.. then complain about it later.

But i agree we should not bash, but help try and help in an inviting way.

 

[detroitdiva]

I totally agree with you. There are so many ppl that are not educated on how to treat black hair, even those that call themselves stylists and professionals. This site has helped me and I'm sure, so many other blk women with the care and maintainance of our hair. But relaxing hair is something that many blk ppl take lightly and they relax according to how they have learned to throughout the years. this is unfortunate for the young woman who is learning the practice because more than likely, she will pass htis horrible tradition down to her daughters. The saying is true:" If you knew better, you'd do better".

 

[qchelle]

Because imo, for some people:

When they see someone with horrible looking hair who is unwilling to listen to them about better hair care practices, that's the 1st thing that comes to mind: why won't she listen to me?! Why can't she understand that I'm right and she's wrong?! She's so stupid. Not: hmm, maybe she's a product of her environment that's just not the default thought process that alot people go off of....for MANY instances (poverty, laziness, ghettoness, etc etc)

 

[AlekHidell]

Come on people we have to admit before finding this forum we were all ignorant about how to take care, grow and maintain our hair.

That's not true for everybody but I understand what you're trying to say. I only point that out because not everybody is into the "sisterhood" of online black hair care communities so they are definitely not trying to help. They're just rude to be rude.

They go by what they were taught at a young age. I don't think it seems right to bash someone for their lack of knowledge. I think it's more helpful to teach them what their doing wrong and what they should know, so they can have increase of understanding.

I agree.

 

[empressri]

There are rude folks everywhere. I've seen folks dragged out on plenty of forums too, here being one.

But oh well, at the end of the day the psychos in internet land aren't signing my paycheck so it's not a biggie to me.