Black Hair - do we MAKE it complicated?!

[Amber_moon]

Re: Black Hair - do we MAKE it complicated?! LONG

I think some black women are so afraid of their hair looking anything but perfect that it gets complicated. Some don't want the "naps" to show, some want it to lay down when our hair really wants to stand up and out LOL
When you fight your hair's natural look it will definately get complicated...

Someone mentioned white women that can wash and go etc, yes, but they don't fight their hair's natural abilities. That's what their hair does. If they tried to create an afro on a daily basis, their hair care would be very complicated too.

Thank you!

 

[bravenewgirl87]

I think that we make our hair more complicated than it needs to be. I think those factors include enviroment, food, and our overly exhausting maintainance. Notice how people on other parts of the world don't neccessarily struggle as much as we do, and some struggle more.


We're just special

 

[Serenity_Peace]

You know, I already gave this testimony, but I must admit that I quite envy non-black women because they can do most anything to their hair and it will grow and thrive.

An example, my former roommate is a cancer survivor. This time last year she was nearly bald. My hair was a little past shoulder length. Though I ended up cutting my hair slightly above shoulder, fast forward to this year and her hair has caught up with mine and is basically growing a lot faster.

And get this: I use absolutely NO heat (especially since I've been airdrying this summer). This woman washes and blow dries her hair nearly every day and yet she has little damage. Meanwhile, I have all these products, where my hair in protective styles, bunning almost daily, staying away from heat, babying my ends...all of this and I can expect for her hair to surpass mine in terms of length. And she tells me all the time: you have all these products and things. Why do black women put so much time and effort into their hair?

I know that black hair is beautiful and versatile, but the amount of work that we tend to have to put into it is very unsettling at times.

I have to work with my hair because it is fine and thin in some areas. So I have to work hard to treat it delicately and take care of it, particularly my ends. If I didn't work at this, my ends would be horrible and my hair would not thrive.

It's a sad, unfortunate reality, but I must be honest: I am envious, perhaps a little resentful of non-black women because they don't seem to have to work hard at all. Now, there are many non-black women who do have to work hard, but their numbers are few and far between it seems.

 

[Serenity_Peace]

i honestly think we can do

and i used to too

but since around 2006, i changed everything

i wash my hair when i feel to, and i just pop my pills

my regime is very simple

and idont deep condition that much anymore

aslong as i have water and a bit of avo'coco, my hair can go for weeks looking moisturized and soft.

i comb my hair like every 7 -10 days

the more you leave it alone, the better it'l llook and the faster it'll grow

Sweetie, I cannot wait to receive your products. I am on the no/low maintenance program and am embarking on my second full week! I'm proud to say that I have not combed my hair. I haven't even washed my hair except for a condition wash last week. I just moisturize, seal with oil, smooth with my fingers and hands, and put back into this tired, lame-arse bun that I wear daily. I hope all this "hiding my hair" thing is worth it.

 

[cocoberry10]

You know, I already gave this testimony, but I must admit that I quite envy non-black women because they can do most anything to their hair and it will grow and thrive.

An example, my former roommate is a cancer survivor. This time last year she was nearly bald. My hair was a little past shoulder length. Though I ended up cutting my hair slightly above shoulder, fast forward to this year and her hair has caught up with mine and is basically growing a lot faster.

And get this: I use absolutely NO heat (especially since I've been airdrying this summer). This woman washes and blow dries her hair nearly every day and yet she has little damage. Meanwhile, I have all these products, where my hair in protective styles, bunning almost daily, staying away from heat, babying my ends...all of this and I can expect for her hair to surpass mine in terms of length. And she tells me all the time: you have all these products and things. Why do black women put so much time and effort into their hair?

I know that black hair is beautiful and versatile, but the amount of work that we tend to have to put into it is very unsettling at times.

I have to work with my hair because it is fine and thin in some areas. So I have to work hard to treat it delicately and take care of it, particularly my ends. If I didn't work at this, my ends would be horrible and my hair would not thrive.

It's a sad, unfortunate reality, but I must be honest: I am envious, perhaps a little resentful of non-black women because they don't seem to have to work hard at all. Now, there are many non-black women who do have to work hard, but their numbers are few and far between it seems.

This was very honest, and I think there are a lot of people that feel this way. Yes, our hair is more cumbersome, but I do think we have a lot of options to do things with our hair, but our hair is “misunderstood” so we haven’t mastered that yet!

 

[curlycraze]

Complicated, no. High maintenance, yes. A labor of love is all it is!

 

[gymfreak336]

Complicated, no. High maintenance, yes. A labor of love is all it is!

That is a good way to put it.

My regime isn't complicated per say but it can get labor intensive. Its okay though because it is the only reason I have hair now.

 

[FeelinIt]

I think we do sometimes make it complicated. Black hair is not complicated, but it is different. Most people , regardless of ethnicity, have major issues with their hair. I see and hear about it every day in my profession, with men, women and children. Our hair's differences and lack of understanding/support for it make it a bigger issue than it should be.

I think it is more "in the head" than what is on the head.

Let's face it, when you try to manipulate your hair to morph it into something it was not meant to be, well hell yeah you are going to encounter probs with it.

When I attempt to straigten my hair I have to jump through hoops and fire rings and wrestle tigers to get it straight. When I wear it natural, I wash, condition, moisterize and I air dry and I'm done. Takes no time at all.

I think it is our desire to do so many different things to our hair that makes it complicated and also our negative view of our hair. Not the hair itself.

 

[FeelinIt]

Re: Black Hair - do we MAKE it complicated?! LONG

I think some black women are so afraid of their hair looking anything but perfect that it gets complicated. Some don't want the "naps" to show, some want it to lay down when our hair really wants to stand up and out LOL
When you fight your hair's natural look it will definately get complicated...

Someone mentioned white women that can wash and go etc, yes, but they don't fight their hair's natural abilities. That's what their hair does. If they tried to create an afro on a daily basis, their hair care would be very complicated too.

EXACTLY!!! Took the words right out of my mouth.

 

[chellero]

I think that it's only as complicated as you make it. I can spend 10 minutes a day on my hair or I can spend 5 hours. It's all about what I'm trying to do. If I am fighting my hair's natural texture and tendencies and trying to straighten it out, then it's going to be more work.

 

[Legend]

Hmmm... is my hair complicated? I've thought about this question a bit. Really the only time my hair gets truly complicated is when I try to make it something it's never going to be. Accepting my hair and cooperating with it, rather than the other way around, has worked wonders.

For example, I learned my hair cannot be straight. My sister can relax hers, flat iron, the whole nine yards and it works for her. Me? My hair would fall out like pine needles (and has). It's too much to worry about trying to keep it on my head with all the products and processes, so I don't straighten it any more. Also, my hair must be moisturized. Constantly. No days off on this one. I've learned to make my life easier and to wear temporary hair pieces instead of overworking my hair to get a certain "look." My hair is all the better for it.

No, my hair isn't terribly complicated. I mean, there are only so many things I can do to it....or try to anyway. I usually explain to people that my hair is rather like that beloved silk blouse that requires a little extra care and investment to stay beautiful. In reality, it can be like a chore: necessary and I'll feel glorious once it's complete and lovely, but I don't always feel like bothering with it.

 

[SleekandBouncy]

No, if anything it's the opposite. If simplicity were the name of the game we'd all be running around with long, flowing hair and the beauty shops on every corner selling extensions would go out of business.
I used to think otherwise, but honestly I do think our hair (typically) takes more time and work.
My white friends wash every day or every other days, sometimes with conditioner others with a gentle shampoo, blow dry with a round brush, curling iron and they are done. Some have issues with thin hair or hair that's prone to tangling and in those cases it's a more complicated process and they are always complaining about it.

Let's take the race aspect out of it since not all black people have 4b hair and not all white people have wavy or straight hair. Put simply I can't rinse my hair, blow dry it, flat iron or curl it and then go out the door every day while maintaining my length.
If I mishandle my hair, it tangles. When I go to white salons they pull out a hair brush and brush the tangles out, but on my hair that causes major hair loss. The best way for me to have straight hair plus maintain length is rollersets or airdrying. I have to deep condition my hair, make sure it's getting enough protein/moisture, make sure I don't wear it out in the cold too much, not use too much heat, etc. etc. etc.
I don't think we understand our hair and so I think our hair practices aren't so much complicated as they are/were incorrect, hence why many belieev black women can't grow long hair. We focus too much on controlling what we've been taught by our mum's is bad and unruly hair so we use heavy greases, gels and even Vaseline. I also think it's possible to make a complicated routine uncomplicated, by eliminating that which is unnecessary and practicing consistency with your routine, but I still think our haircare is by nature more complicated, at least for the kinkier hair types like my own.

 

[lovenharmony]

Heck yeah my hair is complicated...most ladies of different races don't have to worry about their hair being able to grow long - it just does!

Not saying that some black women can't have fast growing head of long hair...I have too many examples to pull from on this board and from my own family members, but it's not the majority. Even naturals have some form of regimen in order for their hair not to break off!

 

[SleekandBouncy]

Hmmm... is my hair complicated? I've thought about this question a bit. Really the only time my hair gets truly complicated is when I try to make it something it's never going to be. Accepting my hair and cooperating with it, rather than the other way around, has worked wonders.

For example, I learned my hair cannot be straight. My sister can relax hers, flat iron, the whole nine yards and it works for her. Me? My hair would fall out like pine needles (and has). It's too much to worry about trying to keep it on my head with all the products and processes, so I don't straighten it any more. Also, my hair must be moisturized. Constantly. No days off on this one. I've learned to make my life easier and to wear temporary hair pieces instead of overworking my hair to get a certain "look." My hair is all the better for it.

No, my hair isn't terribly complicated. I mean, there are only so many things I can do to it....or try to anyway. I usually explain to people that my hair is rather like that beloved silk blouse that requires a little extra care and investment to stay beautiful. In reality, it can be like a chore: necessary and I'll feel glorious once it's complete and lovely, but I don't always feel like bothering with it.

You do make a good point. If I'm honest with myself, the fact is if I were wearing my hair natural I could get up, wash it, shake it out, put something non greasy and moisturizing and be out the door or braid it and wear curly kinks the next morning. My routine wouldn't be much different from my straighter haired friends, however my results would be vastly different.

I amend my original statement, our hair is more complicated when we are wearing it straight. If white women were trying to get kinky bouncy curls I'd imagine it would be equally as complicated.

 

[growth2come]

We have to embrace the fact that our hair is different. Our hair is dry and that is what I attribute to the slow growth rate compared to non-black. Also as people we want what we cant have. I would love to have long(and I mean really long hair) hair. I have seen - after joining this forum that black people can have long hair it will just take patience (lots of it!)...As I was saying we want what we cant have and non- black people wish they had our hair and vice versa. But HOW MANY hair types can be manipulated in so many ways as black people's hair can? We can braid our hair without looking like we are trying something crazy, we can have the afro(and that baby can take on the wind of a hurricane without losing style!!) I can also have my hair straighten to the point where it is so soft and the texture can be matched to that of non-black people's hair(thanks to the miracles worked by my hair dresser.)...so we have it all( Albeit in slow baby steps)! Celebrate this

 

[Legend]

You do make a good point. If I'm honest with myself, the fact is if I were wearing my hair natural I could get up, wash it, shake it out, put something non greasy and moisturizing and be out the door or braid it and wear curly kinks the next morning. My routine wouldn't be much different from my straighter haired friends, however my results would be vastly different.

I amend my original statement, our hair is more complicated when we are wearing it straight. If white women were trying to get kinky bouncy curls I'd imagine it would be equally as complicated.

This is true! Her hair isn't kinky nessesarily, but I have a friend with a perm and color and she has to DC, go to the salon often, and do all these different processes to maintain her hair. (She's older, so she perms it for fullness.) I was actually giggling at her just yesterday at work because I see her with an afro pic--yes, PIC!---fluffing up her strawberry blonde curls!

But, really, my point was really not about straightening hair (I certainly texlax my hair), but I know that my very 4B texture was never meant to be straight or flowy or have a mirror-like finish. I can make my hair do these things, but to maintain this look can create a very complicated and damaging regimen for me. I'd much rather don a flowy, mirror-finish wig!

More proof: I've always wanted a TWA. I think I'd look cute with that style! But for me to even get one would require vast amounts of enery and time because my hair doesn't have a curl pattern. So, I would have to set my hair with time-consuming strawsets every few days just to get the right curl, avoid moisture so it won't poof or uncurl, and all sorts of things just to keep a TWA! My hair was simply never meant to have one.

 

[Candy_C]

Sweetie, I cannot wait to receive your products. I am on the no/low maintenance program and am embarking on my second full week! I'm proud to say that I have not combed my hair. I haven't even washed my hair except for a condition wash last week. I just moisturize, seal with oil, smooth with my fingers and hands, and put back into this tired, lame-arse bun that I wear daily. I hope all this "hiding my hair" thing is worth it.

Hey! yours are being dispatched tomorrow, you will receive an email in the morning confirming this

 

[Barbara]

Growthtocome's first response coincides with my hair stylist's opinion. I can relate to every word she says, because my stylist says it from time to time.

 

[northernbelle]

What I am discovering as I pay greater attention to and take better care of my hair is that is that complication isn't so much the issue as is providing one's hair with what it needs and being consistent in providing those things. So, yes; I do believe we make it far more complicated a process than it ought to be, not only in terms of the number of products used, but also in the over-use of those products. Hair thrives, I believe, when a regimen can be stripped down to its simplest, most basic aspects.

 

[cg92]

I don't think our hair is more complicated. Different, but not more complicated. We make it out to be more complicated by what we choose to do to it. I like the fact I don't have to wash/blowdry my hair everyday or every otherday. I think it's great I can go a week or more without washing.

The styles we choose to wear are more complicated which lead to more stress (shalacked hard curls, tight braids, pulling it back to tight, weaves). We own the term fried dyed and laid to the side. I have a friend who loves to brush and comb her hair during the day even though it adds extra stress on the hair. Then we overprocess our hair or use a way too hot pressing comb b/c we want that bone straight look or try to go blonde or put color in at the wrong time or the wrong strength. We use stove irons on relaxed hair. We sacrifice good health for style. Think about what happens to women of other races when they overprocess with perms, backcomb too much, use too much heat, or color their hair too much or try to go from black 2 blonde their hair looks just as fried and damaged.

If we would just be nice to our hair and work with it instead of fighting it things would go better. Stop doing what doesn't work. Find the products that work with your hair then WASH, CONDITION, CHOOSE THE BEST DRYING/STYLE METHOD FOR YOUR HAIR (ROLLERSET, AIRDRY, TWISTS, BLOW DRY, CURL/FLAT IRON) IF YOU NEED TO USE A LEAVE IN, SETTING LOTION, OIL, PROTECTANT GO AHEAD, PROTECT IT AT NIGHT, MOISTURIZE DURING THE WEEK IF NECESSARY, BE GENTLE AT ALL TIMES (WASHING & COMBING), THEN DO IT AGAIN IN 7 DAYS. How hard is that???