I'M JUST NOT HAIR SAVVY...AM I ALONE?!?

[tt8]

So after valid effort, great help from other members, and almost a year of trying to grow. I am beginning to realize with my hair or hair care in general, I don't have green thumb. I never have known how to care for my hair. Its not a talent. This is something, I know that hair care is learned but if there was a Syllvan for hair care I would need to go. I might just need to go to the salon once a week as expensive as that is Lord Jesus. I am almost a year of being natural and I feel that I have done more harm than good to my hair.
I am not frustrated (though it might seem like it) but I really feel how many times am I supposed to mess my hair up before I admit that maybe I need to leave it alone and up to a professional.
I might be alone but it seems to me that this forum is full of at home-hair pros and I am just not one of them.

 

[Kacie]

If you're talking about styling skills, I had ZERO until I found ....half wigs .

 

[KizzieNapps]

You are not alone!!!! I feel the same way. I have never styled my own hair before finding this site and trying to start after 23 years of letting other people do my hair is not looking promising. I too have been thinking about trying to find a stylist that I can trust with my hair and just keeping my hands out of it. Right now I think I am definitely doing more harm than helping. Its taking too long for me to find staple products, I cant even decide if I want to be natural or texlaxed or relaxed. I'm just lost. I would rather have a "PROFESSIONAL" just tell me what products would work best for my hair. Maybe I'm just lazy or I could just be an idiot when it comes to hair care (most likely the latter) but all this testing and trying "new" things is ruining my hair not helping it.

 

[Moroni]

So after valid effort, great help from other members, and almost a year of trying to grow. I am beginning to realize with my hair or hair care in general, I don't have green thumb. I never have known how to care for my hair. Its not a talent. This is something, I know that hair care is learned but if there was a Syllvan for hair care I would need to go. I might just need to go to the salon once a week as expensive as that is Lord Jesus. I am almost a year of being natural and I feel that I have done more harm than good to my hair.
I am not frustrated (though it might seem like it) but I really feel how many times am I supposed to mess my hair up before I admit that maybe I need to leave it alone and up to a professional.
I might be alone but it seems to me that this forum is full of at home-hair pros and I am just not one of them.

Umm, wake up call! Not all "professionals" are going to provide you with the care you want, either. For the most part, they know how to style, but their knowledge of how to maintain healthy hair is lacking, because a lot of their education if product-driven. If it happens to be the wrong product for your hair, well.....

Don't we have a "Sylvan's for Hair" thread up in here somewhere??? C'mon, tt8, give us some specifics, and let us help! What's your reggie? What's your specific challenge?

 

[cmw45]

Well dear, I mean, if you're talking about learning what your hair likes and dislikes it's gonna take some time. ESPECIALLY, if you started your hair journey relaxed and then went natural. My relaxed hair love, love, loved protein and it took my three attepmts and my hair turning soild as a ROCK before I learned my natural hair is not a fan.

If you are not frustrated then GREAT...you've won half the battle. If you are or are just tired, consider putting your hair in a protective style and taking a break.

When I was trying to figure out what works and doesn't work for my hair I learned that the best thing to do was to change one thing at a time. If you jump on every board bandwagon you're going to have no idea what works and does't work for your hair. You also have to give some methods time. While you might be able to immediately tell whether or not your hair is going to be a fan of oil rinsing...it may take doing it a couple of times before you figure out whether or not you hair likes con. washing.

I would just ditto the comments of the other posters on stylist. I mean if you've been going to one particular stylist and you know that they have a green thumb, that's one thing. If you haven't and are just going to try someone out that is completely different. They can do more damage than good.

And I am hair styling challenged so right now I am just keeping it simple. Braidouts, braids, and an ocassional wig.

 

[Spongie Bloom]

girl you aint the only one its been a month of me taking care of my real relaxed hair and im still trying to find my staples i dont know what exactly my hair REALLY likes but last week's wash day was definately trying, i now know my hair likes to be dc ed, pooed then light con then style, it doesnt like to be pood then dc i cant even style my own hair and when i rollerset it (purple rollers)it ends up in a pony tail cause i dont know how to style a rollerset

 

[tt8]

In Regards to the bold area in the reply; this is how I feel. 1)Due to my profession, I am not sure if being natural is in my best interest. 2) The tiny curls I am losing when detangling make me think I am losing more length than retaining. 3) I believe I wouldn't have to manipulate my hair as much (manipulating i.e., washing then shrinkage) if it were treated chemically

You are not alone!!!! I feel the same way. I have never styled my own hair before finding this site and trying to start after 23 years of letting other people do my hair is not looking promising. I too have been thinking about trying to find a stylist that I can trust with my hair and just keeping my hands out of it. Right now I think I am definitely doing more harm than helping. Its taking too long for me to find staple products, I cant even decide if I want to be natural or texlaxed or relaxed. I'm just lost. I would rather have a "PROFESSIONAL" just tell me what products would work best for my hair. Maybe I'm just lazy or I could just be an idiot when it comes to hair care (most likely the latter) but all this testing and trying "new" things is ruining my hair not helping it.

 

[br0wney3z]

I thought I was the only one that is challenged in this area. I keep making excuses saying that when my hair grows longer I'll work up the nerve to experiment and really learn how to style. But what I'm finding out is the more it grows, the more nervous I become about trying some style and messing up my hair. Now I'm contemplating going natural and that just seems even more daunting to have to learn how to style a completely different texture of hair. I think I'm just going to slap on some braids, and forget about looking at my own hair for a while

 

[tt8]

STATS: 4b natural with 4a spread sporadically all over my head; super porous (sinks immediately in water test) tiny spirals, Fine strands (lots of them) rarely use heat, hair is never out of protective style (wig/pony)

Thanks for the help. I have found a great hair care professional who knows how to care for the hair but not style (which I am not mad at, cause I would rather have the health). She just costs me a car note to go even 2x a month cause she know she is bomb.
My regimen (thus far) is the following:
-co-washing 2-3x a week with Aveda DR or Kenra Moisturizing Cond.
-dc-ing 3x a week with Kenra Nourishing Masque
-salerm or Giovanni Direct for Leave-in
-seal with ORS Olive Oil or Castor Oil
* hair was moist with the regimen but still had major shedding: tried not finger-combing except 1x a week, hair was a little better but not much
* i was wearing lace fronts as a protective style but the band on the nape was causing breakage in my "kitchen" so for the past month I've been in a phony pony...
* My hair doesn't like Giovanni Direct (ever) or Salerm (after a while) it was hard so I switched to cantu shea butter just sits on my hair like coconut oil
* a member told me that co-washing & dc-ing so much was damaging and that I need a shampoo when I stopped dc-ing so often BAM, dry brillo pad... My hair didn't like the Aubrey Organics Honey Suckle shampoo either....Or ORS Carrot oil that I tried...

Umm, wake up call! Not all "professionals" are going to provide you with the care you want, either. For the most part, they know how to style, but their knowledge of how to maintain healthy hair is lacking, because a lot of their education if product-driven. If it happens to be the wrong product for your hair, well.....

Don't we have a "Sylvan's for Hair" thread up in here somewhere??? C'mon, tt8, give us some specifics, and let us help! What's your reggie? What's your specific challenge?

 

[fluffylocks]

I dont think your alone at all-----

And the savvy imo is really not needed.

Most everyone is leaving their hair alone and doing protective styles....thats the way to go.

You got buns, ponytails, clawclips, twists, braids, twistouts, braidouts, bantusets.....NONE of those require skill at all and their still cute.

The savvy to me comes from rollersetting 1-2x weekly and cowashing daily (as far as the detangling and manipulation that might be needed for someone that would be better off just leavin their hair alone)

And you can also learn----Take about 6 months....in the meantine you can wear falls and buns maybe....and in some areas they have stlying schools, not cosmetolgy, but school that teach you how to braid and set hair....or you can order hair trainging dvds and buy a manequin (i did) and just learn

Your hair is much better in your own hands unless you can find a member of LHCF thats a stylist

But anyway, if your hair challenged, just find a good simple regimen, fun protective cute styles, and leave your hair alone (imo)

 

[TriniStarr]

tt8, sweetie..it TAKES TIME....Rome was not build in a DAY...

btw...according to your last post...i see you go urself a littel regiment going on. Thats a good start!!

Hell, i am still tying to master rollersetting and i know if cont to them, i will get better.

TRUST ME, i was a salon queen myself, until i was like i can do this myself at home! and sure enought, i started doing my hair at home and so far i have saved myself A LOT of money.

So, give it another try and GOOD LUCK!

 

[KizzieNapps]

tt8, sweetie..it TAKES TIME....Rome was not build in a DAY...

btw...according to your last post...i see you go urself a littel regiment going on. Thats a good start!!

Hell, i am still tying to master rollersetting and i know if cont to them, i will get better.

TRUST ME, i was a salon queen myself, until i was like i can do this myself at home! and sure enought, i started doing my hair at home and so far i have saved myself A LOT of money.

So, give it another try and GOOD LUCK!

I agree with this....but maybe you can go to that expensive stylist and get an idea for a regime that you can keep up at home if she's good at haircare like you say; she should be able to help. And maybe you can just cut down your visits to once a month to save $$ until you can take care of your hair yourself. Someone else suggested protective styling which is what I am doing now as well. I have my hair in braids even though they are def not my favorite style. I just found a way to rock them and it helps me to take care of my hair without destroying it.

 

[remnant]

Well dear, I mean, if you're talking about learning what your hair likes and dislikes it's gonna take some time. ESPECIALLY, if you started your hair journey relaxed and then went natural. My relaxed hair love, love, loved protein and it took my three attepmts and my hair turning soild as a ROCK before I learned my natural hair is not a fan.

If you are not frustrated then GREAT...you've won half the battle. If you are or are just tired, consider putting your hair in a protective style and taking a break.

When I was trying to figure out what works and doesn't work for my hair I learned that the best thing to do was to change one thing at a time. If you jump on every board bandwagon you're going to have no idea what works and does't work for your hair. You also have to give some methods time. While you might be able to immediately tell whether or not your hair is going to be a fan of oil rinsing...it may take doing it a couple of times before you figure out whether or not you hair likes con. washing.

I would just ditto the comments of the other posters on stylist. I mean if you've been going to one particular stylist and you know that they have a green thumb, that's one thing. If you haven't and are just going to try someone out that is completely different. They can do more damage than good.

And I am hair styling challenged so right now I am just keeping it simple. Braidouts, braids, and an ocassional wig.

Great post I agree with all you said

 

[remnant]

girl you aint the only one its been a month of me taking care of my real relaxed hair and im still trying to find my staples i dont know what exactly my hair REALLY likes but last week's wash day was definately trying, i now know my hair likes to be dc ed, pooed then light con then style, it doesnt like to be pood then dc i cant even style my own hair and when i rollerset it (purple rollers)it ends up in a pony tail cause i dont know how to style a rollerset

Good beginning Stargoddess keep on working and searching what your hair like and dislike it is the way to find your regimen and stick with it

 

[tt8]

Dear, KACIE, JLUVSTWEETY, MORONI, CMW45, STARGODDES, BROWNEY3Z, FLUFFYLOCKS, TRINISTARR, AND SOUN!
Thank you all for the help and encouragement. It is really needed at this time. I really appreciate you all taking time out to help me with this. I wish you all healthy hair that you can sit on

 

[kellie7777]

you're not alone with this at all.
it takes time to know what works. when i first started lurking this site, i tried whatever i could to figure out my hair needs. i looked at a lot of sites for encouragement and stuff. then i discovered the fotkis and i lurked them too.. i'm still learning. every now and then i blow out my fro and rock that. pam grier uh huh...

 

[beaux cheveux]

Hello! Gurl you read my mind, I do everything I can to keep my hair in health,whether its K.I.S.S.ing, doing intensive treatments, using little or no products, doing nothing to my hair at all, cowashing.
But my hair doesn't seem to grow, I see newgrowth but come next touch up it be about the same length it always is.
I'm starting to think my hair just stops at shoulder length,
I cut it to base of neck to get rid of split and see-through ends. (Thats another problem I work harder then anyone I know to make sure I have no split ends and yet I always do, I never wear my hair down or I wear braids, don't comb or try not to use heat, yet to no avail)
i can't do my hair either, I just wear my hair in a ponyholder and tucked under I don't know how some ladies can have salon-style looking hair all the time talking about they a zillion weeks post

Just venting my frustration,..:endworld:

 

[kellie7777]

Hello! Gurl you read my mind, I do everything I can to keep my hair in health,whether its K.I.S.S.ing, doing intensive treatments, using little or no products, doing nothing to my hair at all, cowashing.
But my hair doesn't seem to grow, I see newgrowth but come next touch up it be about the same length it always is.
I'm starting to think my hair just stops at shoulder length,
I cut it to base of neck to get rid of split and see-through ends. (Thats another problem I work harder then anyone I know to make sure I have no split ends and yet I always do, I never wear my hair down or I wear braids, don't comb or try not to use heat, yet to no avail)
i can't do my hair either, I just wear my hair in a ponyholder and tucked under I don't know how some ladies can have salon-style looking hair all the time talking about they a zillion weeks post

Just venting my frustration,..:endworld:

that's hilarious

 

[ladybug71]

No advice, but just wanted to send you a

 

[PinkPeony]

You are not alone.
I don't know how to do braiding styles or how to weave it up and flatironing takes too long to do it on the regular let's not even mention rollersetting.
However I found this helped me alot when it came to retaining some length b/c all I do is co-wash,airdry and bun

 

[Naturallong81]

i'm not hair savvy or creative. but i'm to paronid to let anyone touch my hair!

 

[JustKiya]

Based on the regimen, and what you know about your hair, you sound very hair-savvy - you know your hair, you are observant enough to notice what it likes and doesn't like.
Sounds like the other member who told you cowashing & DC'ing so often was wrong though, if as soon as you stopped doing that, your hair turned into a brillo pad - I think that's the number 1 thing in being hair-savvy - listen to your HAIR before you listen to anyone else - and if it ain't broke, leave it alone.

If you are talking about actual styles - that's a different thing, but all that takes is practice - No one is the BOMB the first time they do anything, but by the 50th time, most folks are pretty tight.

Personally, I don't think that hair growth is a talent - it's a learned skill, and with time, dedication and patience, EVERYONE can learn.....

Don't knock yourself!!!

 

[tt8]

^^^THANK YOU SO MUCH^^^^
I am still figuring some things out. I realized I have to culprits trying to keep me from reaching REPUNZEL: hard water and porous hair...

I also think my heat cap dries my hair out instead of helping to lock in moisture. I bought some new products and I am going to try them out and see how it goes. O, I am taking up donations for the GET TT A STEAMER Fund if yall interested I will be glad to send you all the info.