Naturals- What would you do: Relax or Chop it off?

[Miss*Tress]

Beautiful natural hair at any length is a blessing and rarity. It also gives a more individual look so I would probably - although reluctantly - cut. Before cutting, try wearing your hair straight more regularly so you don't have so much difficulty styling.

Good luck whatever you decide and post lots of pics of the outcome.

 

[SilverSurfer]

What's the point of having natural hair if you can't wear it in any length you want? If you cut it today, a year or two later it will be back at this same length or longer...so then you will be back at this same dilemma/problem. Are you just going to keep cutting it to maintain a certain length that you may not want?

I would texlax or relax 2 to 3 times a year to enjoy my hair and the length. As for the "WOW" factor, I've seen relaxed heads that give the WOW factor too. It's really all about the person, either you have the WOW factor or you don't.

 

[BrockStar]

Brock, we have similar snouzers (noses). My husband calls me 'Snuffaluffagous.'

OT: I get a little upset over this new movie called 'Penelope.' Everytime I see that preview, I go 'what's so wrong with the girl's nose?'

Lol and I was Ms. Piggy..hehehe

 

[turnergirl]

We have talked about this quite a bit for the last couple of months. I really feel your being at a cross roads is telling you that you may not be ready to make a decision. When you are ready to chose you will. Don't stress yourself out about what it will be then. Just try to enjoy where you are now and when you make a decision enjoy that also. Even if you are still in the same boat.

As you know I ended my year long hair debate by texlaxing. It was a difficult decision that I often tried to force but could not. In time it was a clear as ever what I wanted to do. So I did it. It feels a little weird "not being natchal and all" but I am loving life now that it is not all about how I will get a comb through my hair.

Besides I will celebrate my 30th or 31st birthday with a big chop and the dye job of my dreams. 4.5 years away. Might happen before then.

PS. I do have one regret. Zipping my hair up in my jacket 5 times this week and shutting it in the car door. (My hair is not even that long) If you do texlax you will have to get used to having so much hanging hair all of the time.

 

[suzyqilil]

At the most, I would get a texlax.

 

[domniqqt]

Me personally, I would sit back relax and think real hard about it. It's all on you on what you feel is most important. Importance ranes from each individual. Shoot I wish I had a problem like that... *starts daydreaming*... one day My hair will be as long as shuga's. one day.........

 

[MissJ]

What is your goal length, and aren't you almost or already there?

 

[Lovelylocs]

Bublin, your natural hair so beautiful, don't relax. Maybe you should try rollersetting it.

 

[TaraDyan]

Yeah I've felt like that before. Maybe you can just get a good trim? I know that usually makes a difference when my hair is acting up.

I agree with this suggestion. You don't have to get a lot trimmed off to make a huge difference in the way your hair behaves. A good trim and flat iron session could do wonders for you right now.

Just don't do anything drastic right now until you've had time to really think things through ... please, Bub.

 

[ChocoKitty]

PLEASE DO NOT CUT YOUR HAIR BUBBLIN'!!!

Rollerset, flatiron, stretch with a blow dryer or at as VERY LAST RESORT--telax.

When I get to the point where I think my natural hair is becoming too much of a hassle I may texlax it.

 

[CenteredGirl]

Wow, your hair is fantastic as a natural. I could only dream. I don't get your dilema. I sure wish I had your hair problem! tee hee Sorry I can't help you because I can't see your problem - at all. erplexed I'm natural so I'm biased to staying natural, but it's your choice. Whatever you do, I will be there to support you.

 

[dynamic1]

Your hair is really beautiful, and I think it will remain so either way. However, it may help to try to find the beauty in what you see as imperfection. Like others said, maybe you could roller set, straighten, and/or get a very small cut/big trim to get you over this hump! Or, just "embrace the frizz", especially if length is the most important thing.

My decision in Dec 07 was a drastic cut. My volume of hair was getting to me a bit in addition to a stressful year, and I let the hair go. I sometimes think I could have been a bit more patient, or cut less. But relaxing was not an option for me. My hair was great with a relaxer, but the dermatitis made me pause. So, I will enjoy my hair cut for a while and look for the good when my hair is acting goofy! But I intend to let it grow back out eventually.

 

[Poobity]

I would cut a couple inches off and wear it pressed.

 

[zzirvingj]

Yes, this is another option. I need to be more thankful for the fact of knowing someone who is a professional and who isn't trife and will straighten my hair with class.

I will make another appointment with her.

Question to the nappys who press- how do you all maintain the press?

It must be the technique my stylist uses, cause when I get mine pressed there isn't anything I have to do to actually maintain my press

I just pincurl it at night or roll the ends with a couple of big rollers, and tie it with a satin scarf. If it needs a little more moisture, I'll put a DAB of avocado butter. I say a DAB cuz it's kinda thick....

 

[zzirvingj]

I actually was the having this very same conversation regarding my hair just last weekend. For me length is not an issue and I do not want to relax so I have decided to cut my hair. I am not sure how short I want to go, I will probably start off by cutting 3 inches and go from there. If I need to cut more I will do so down the line.

NOOOOOO!

Just kidding Your hair is sooo pretty...I just don't want to see you cut it!

 

[zzirvingj]

As you know I ended my year long hair debate by texlaxing.

WHEN DID YOU TEXLAX???

 

[tthreat08]

Guuurrrrrrlllllll!!!! Nooooooooooooooo! I am selfishly askingyou to not cut your hair! Now that it's longer, you just have to figure out a new styling method. Don't relax it either....maybe just texlax.

 

[zzirvingj]

Bublin...to answer your question...well for me (right now anyways) it is just as important that I have length as it is for me to be natural, but that's me.

So considering that both are very important to me, I would press my hair. I feel that's okay because I also have a stylist that does a good job of protecting my hair, and I am able to take a breather from detangling my hair for a while. It gives me almost a totally different look, and I'm able to enjoy the length and "swang" my hair has whenever I get it straightened.

You have some gorgeous hair girl! One of the last times I got it pressed this guy came up to me and complemented me on my hair and said, "Your hair isn't relaxed, is it? It doesn't look relaxed." He said something about it looked different, but in a good way different. I thought his comment was interesting. Even when you wear your natural hair straight, it STILL has that "wow" factor

Good luck with whatever you decide to do! I know I may be getting another press here and there very soon myself...spring is right around the corner and EVERY SPRING I get an ITCH to do something different!! (Even though I rarely do anything different...I just still get this major feeling of wanting a change )

 

[Bubblingbrownshuga]

Hey, what about locs? That way you can keep the length and be natural. You don't have just two options... I wish you luck either way you go. Also, will you be at our next meetup?

Locs are not an option and yes, my dahling, I WILL BE THERE at the next meetup. We always have so much fun.

 

[Bubblingbrownshuga]

Bubbling let me be frank with you. I think you are being too hard on your hair and yourself. There are a few women on this board who have that WOW factor and you are one of them - a few others that are unique (dysalla, flowerhair). Everytime and I mean everytime, you post exciting siggys. One day you might have braids, twists, or a beautiful updo the next time it might be straight or a wild frizzy fro but it's beautiful and it's like wow. However, relax your hair and the wow factor is gone. It will be straight and long and probably very pretty but BORING. Nevertheless, it's your hair and you are going to do what you have been itching to do in the last few months it's your hair.

Laurend, I really wish I was being to hard on my hair, but I am not. Lemme explain what my hair does when it's dry:

Do you remember Pump it Up Spritz? Do you recall having your hair spritzed so much, sections of it clump together and if you tried to pull it apart, you would actually in a sense 'shred' your hair? I have to wet my hair daily so that I can style it. I don't want to get in the habit of combing my hair daily b/c that would cause too much damage to my hair as it's done before.

I had a chat with a lady at my job today who relaxes. She was biracial and she told me that everytime she relaxes her hair, she HAS to pull it to the ends or else there's no point in getting it relaxed. Now, here's the kicker- her hair still frizzes. I was like It made me think about running from any dampness in the air in fear of my hair frizzing if I had a relaxer.

 

[Bubblingbrownshuga]

What is your goal length, and aren't you almost or already there?

Goal lengths:
In it's natural, shrunken state- hair that is at my armpit
Straightened- below mid back length

Am I almost there? When I stretch my hair in it's shrunken state, it seems like it, but when it's straightened, I am like WTCrap? I thought my hair was longererplexed

 

[Bubblingbrownshuga]

I agree with this suggestion. You don't have to get a lot trimmed off to make a huge difference in the way your hair behaves. A good trim and flat iron session could do wonders for you right now.

Just don't do anything drastic right now until you've had time to really think things through ... please, Bub.

Oh yes, I am thinking things through, especially since I now have Dance Dance Revolution for my Wii and anticipate getting Wii sports so I can get my workout on, not to mention my GIRL Cathe Friedrich makes me wanna cuss when she works my legs...

All this to say that I really believe if I got a relaxer, I would be too concerned about my hair reverting than me being healthy

 

[Bubblingbrownshuga]

Precious ones, I really appreciate you all listening and helping me think things through on this hair thing. I will be okay.

 

[BillsBackerz67]

Laurend, I really wish I was being to hard on my hair, but I am not. Lemme explain what my hair does when it's dry:

Do you remember Pump it Up Spritz? Do you recall having your hair spritzed so much, sections of it clump together and if you tried to pull it apart, you would actually in a sense 'shred' your hair? I have to wet my hair daily so that I can style it. I don't want to get in the habit of combing my hair daily b/c that would cause too much damage to my hair as it's done before.

I had a chat with a lady at my job today who relaxes. She was biracial and she told me that everytime she relaxes her hair, she HAS to pull it to the ends or else there's no point in getting it relaxed. Now, here's the kicker- her hair still frizzes. I was like It made me think about running from any dampness in the air in fear of my hair frizzing if I had a relaxer.[/quote]

one of the main reasons why i stopped relaxing. my hair still turned into a poof ball if i didnt flat iron it...it looked like a droopy wng with frizzness and no curl pattern. im like damn i might as well have no relaxer if its going to look like this.

I flat iron my hair and if i really really want to i can stretch that press to 3 weeks. we have really dry cold winters so humidity is not an issue and my hair stays straight. I put ORS carrot oil on the ends or profectiv break free i wear 3 scarves and a shower cap in the shower

 

[BillsBackerz67]

Guuurrrrrrlllllll!!!! Nooooooooooooooo! I am selfishly askingyou to not cut your hair! Now that it's longer, you just have to figure out a new styling method. Don't relax it either....maybe just texlax.

and whats funny is that when most textlax, its to get to her texture or very close to it ironically

 

[turnergirl]

WHEN DID YOU TEXLAX???

I "telaxed" at the beginning of Jan. What is really weird is that my hair has not changed much. It hangs a little more but the texture is the same. So it is still driving me crazy a little bit. I just did not have the guts to go any further.

 

[chocolate01]

NOOOOOO!

Just kidding Your hair is sooo pretty...I just don't want to see you cut it!

Thanks for the compliment, I just feel like the scissors are calling my name and it gets louder everyday

 

[leleepop]

i would play with it.....I do not think cutting would be a big deal either. Your hair would grow back fast.BUT if you really dont want to.... you just want easier hair...... I would wear it str8 more, try to maintain that look, either way you have beautiful hair & you will be alright. Have Fun!

 

[rabs77]

Yes, this is another option. I need to be more thankful for the fact of knowing someone who is a professional and who isn't trife and will straighten my hair with class.

I will make another appointment with her.

Question to the nappys who press- how do you all maintain the press?

Bublingbrownsuga....Just want you to know you are one of my natural idols. I understand your fustration, but I haven't been pushed yet to the point of wanting to relax I get fustrated with knots all the time when I wear it natural. Because of that I have been keeping it pressed a lot lately. The key to keeping the press as long as possible is wrapping your hair. I thought I knew how to wrap hair,until I watched how macherie does it on her website www.naturaltextures.com . That's when I realised I didn't know what the heck I was doing She has a great tutorial on how to wrap. I have realised that my presses stay a lot longer when I wrap before going to bed. HTH

 

[anon123]

Oh yes, I am thinking things through, especially since I now have Dance Dance Revolution for my Wii and anticipate getting Wii sports so I can get my workout on, not to mention my GIRL Cathe Friedrich makes me wanna cuss when she works my legs...

All this to say that I really believe if I got a relaxer, I would be too concerned about my hair reverting than me being healthy

off topic, but I used to LOVE me some DDR. Back in the day when there was only PlayStation and I was in Korea, I bought a Play Station just to play that game. For real, that was the only one I had. And I worked that pad so much I had to buy a new one every month or two. So much fun!

anyway, good luck with your hair. it's beautiful.