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getting the urge to relax...:(

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teysmith

teysmith

Well-Known Member
Trying so hard to fight this!! but this pile of ish on my head is urking the hell out of me!!! I dont know what to do with it! I've been wearing a fony pony but thats getting B-O-R-I-N-G!!! ughhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!
...let me try flat ironing this mess!!!:wallbash:
I've never looked this terrible in my life!!!!!
 
:needpics:

What exactly is wrong with your hair? How long is it? Have you considered wigging/braiding/twisting it so you don't have to deal with it for a spell?

When I got tired of wearing my hair out every day, I plaited it and I haven't had to think about my hair for months. I only deal with it when I want to. I wear hats and wraps too, with a baggy underneath.

Hair isn't supposed to consume you so much or make you unhappy. You have to do what makes you happy not what you think people expect of you. No one will think you a loser if you give up the natural journey. And if anyone does, what do you care?
 
Braid it up while you develop a game plan.

I'm in braids now and will be for the next 2 weeks. I got tired of my ole tired styles. It just wasn't fun anymore and I'm not going back to a relaxer. I never even think of that as an option. But, cutting my hair OFF is always one of the options.

So, I've stayed in braids for maybe 3 months. I've had aobut 3 different braid styles during these 3 months. Now, I'm tired of this and I'm ordering tons of natural products to help combat friz, enhance curl, moisturize etc...and I've been watching youtube videos for styling tutorials.

In 2 weeks when my products come I will have put together a whole game plan on styling options and commence to doing the new styles I learned.

Just a few options that you might want to look into too.
 
oh boy! i had the urge about 2 months ago and was planning on relaxing. i was just so frustrated with some single strand knots. but i hung in there and the urge has passed.

i can only tell you to give it time. sleep on it cause you may feel different after a while. don't relax out of frustration you might regret it later.

i know if i did relax i would have been upset at myself right now!
 
Are you 100% natural or transitioning---cuz if you are transitioning..then I can sympathize(I only transitioned for like 4 or 5 months because I was tired of looking like a crackhead) but if you are natural...what kinds of styles are u wearing? Do you have alot of shrinkage? Maybe u should try braids or a weave or wig it up until ur hair is longer....
 
I want to braid it up..but I dont have money to pay anyone to do it for me.. I know how to braid myself but it usally take me several days. but usually I never finish. my job requires me to look nice so I cant wear my hair half braided to work. I'm defanately not a big fan of wigs.. I dont know what to do.. I just dont feel pretty with my hair out of control like this.
 
I truly understand what you're saying...and I'm really going thru it especially since the weather is all jacked up here.

My ends are pretty straight, but near my scalp... its a mess.....I don't want to keep flatironing because of the heat.... there has to be a better way!

Braids are definitely an option... but not in my budget right now...I was thinking of trying to do them myself... but my hair is APL... I can't even imagining trying to braid past that... chile pleaseeeeee!

I've been doing ponys and buns... but getting tired... and these two textures are a handful...plus.

You are not alone.... I am here with you...
 
Nonie said:
:needpics:

What exactly is wrong with your hair? How long is it? Have you considered wigging/braiding/twisting it so you don't have to deal with it for a spell?

When I got tired of wearing my hair out every day, I plaited it and I haven't had to think about my hair for months. I only deal with it when I want to. I wear hats and wraps too, with a baggy underneath.

Hair isn't supposed to consume you so much or make you unhappy. You have to do what makes you happy not what you think people expect of you. No one will think you a loser if you give up the natural journey. And if anyone does, what do you care?
Click to expand...


lol i could take pics..but of what? This mess????!!
 
:Round up $200 and run to the African braiders stat! :yep:
I've been natural 5 years and I've been braided about at least 2 of the 5 (off and on).
 
boingboing said:
oh boy! i had the urge about 2 months ago and was planning on relaxing. i was just so frustrated with some single strand knots. but i hung in there and the urge has passed.

i can only tell you to give it time. sleep on it cause you may feel different after a while. don't relax out of frustration you might regret it later.

i know if i did relax i would have been upset at myself right now!
Click to expand...


yeah but u have gorgeous hair!!!! :(
 
ryanshope said:
Are you 100% natural or transitioning---cuz if you are transitioning..then I can sympathize(I only transitioned for like 4 or 5 months because I was tired of looking like a crackhead) but if you are natural...what kinds of styles are u wearing? Do you have alot of shrinkage? Maybe u should try braids or a weave or wig it up until ur hair is longer....
Click to expand...


I'm transitioning...my hair is only neck length and the front is way shorter! thats exactly what I look like...A CRACK HEAD!!!
 
nappystorm said:
:Round up $200 and run to the African braiders stat! :yep:
I've been natural 5 years and I've been braided about at least 2 of the 5 (off and on).
Click to expand...


200!!! girl right now I couldnt even pay 50 dollars to get my hair braided.. I wish I could get my hair braided though... my SO is african and his family wont even give me a discount!!!:(
 
I've been seeing your many posts/blogs on the same theme. Relax and be done, I say. Your hair is what it is in it's natural state and you don't like/can't deal, so change it...take care of it..and get on w/ your life.

No need to keep torturing yourself or us. Natural ain't for everybody.
 
Last edited:
teysmith said:
200!!! girl right now I couldnt even pay 50 dollars to get my hair braided.. I wish I could get my hair braided though... my SO is african and his family wont even give me a discount!!!:(
Click to expand...
Umm no boo. They don't do discounts:nono:
My braider done gave me gas money, bought me food, and even let me kepp her cell phone overnight (long story) but she will not discount them braids:sad:
 
jamaraa said:
I've been seeing your many posts/blogs on the same theme. Relax and be done, I say. Your hair is what it is in it's natural state and you don't like/can't deal, so change it...take care of it..and get on w/ your life.

No need to keep torturing yourself or us. Natural ain't for everybody.
Click to expand...
:blush: Not torturing me. I imagine like most of us, she came here for support:yep:

But I do agree with the poster than returning to a relaxer doesn't mean you're a failure
 
jamaraa said:
I've been seeing your many posts/blogs on the same theme. Relax and be done, I say. Your hair is what it is in it's natural state and you don't like/can't deal, so change it...take care of it..and get on w/ your life.

No need to keep torturing yourself or us. Natural ain't for everybody.
Click to expand...


okay..fine..I wont ask or complain anymore about my hair anymore.... as a matter a fact I'll stay off the hair forum and hang out in some of the others...maybe the off topic section....:sad:
 
This is why I didn't transition long, the 2 textures is challenging to deal with. I would suggest trying half wigs until your natural hair is a little longer.
 
Well that explains alot, transitioning when you have longer hair is A beast, with shorter hair, it is almost unbearable---when I used to try and transition with shorter hair---it just turned into a long stretch. When i FINALLY went natural I did because:

1. EVERY ONE that was my "SheHAIRO" had gone natural.
2. I was admiring more fros than relaxed heads.
3. Everyone that was natural that I know IRL had drool worthy hair.
4. Biggest reason---I wanted to hurry up and get BACK to MBL with natural hair---if I had "STAYED" the course with my decision, instead of going back to what I knew, I would BE MBL now...instead I am 9-10 months since my BC but I LOVE MY HAIR.

Not just love like "oh, my fro is kinda cute", love like,"man WHY did I waste years, time, chemical burns, set backs, etc to avoid this?" My hair is not only good, it is great. No breakage, no thin patches, full, and healthy.

If you choose to relax, we can understand---but I would rather BC than go back to relaxing(especially if you have gonna for a long time w/o).
 
TrustMeLove said:
Braid it up while you develop a game plan.

I'm in braids now and will be for the next 2 weeks. I got tired of my ole tired styles. It just wasn't fun anymore and I'm not going back to a relaxer. I never even think of that as an option. But, cutting my hair OFF is always one of the options.

So, I've stayed in braids for maybe 3 months. I've had aobut 3 different braid styles during these 3 months. Now, I'm tired of this and I'm ordering tons of natural products to help combat friz, enhance curl, moisturize etc...and I've been watching youtube videos for styling tutorials.

In 2 weeks when my products come I will have put together a whole game plan on styling options and commence to doing the new styles I learned.

Just a few options that you might want to look into too.
Click to expand...

GREAT ADVICE! I tell people the same thing. Tuck it away until you figure it out. I have about 10 wigs that I wear whenever my hair is getting on my nerves. It saves my hair and gives me a break in the meantime. Plus, I don't have to spend any extra money whenever this 'tired of this mess' feeling comes over me and I still look jazzy!:grin:
 
teysmith said:
okay..fine..I wont ask or complain anymore about my hair anymore.... as a matter a fact I'll stay off the hair forum and hang out in some of the others...maybe the off topic section....:sad:
Click to expand...

Girl stop right there. Don't let someone having a bad day keep you off this forum. :nono:

Get on back in here. :grin::grin::grin::grin::grin::grin:
 
I am relaxed but I have also been natural twice since I started relaxing.

Relax your body, wait a few days, and think about it. Is this just out of frustration or is this a life style change for you? *you don't have to answer me, just questions you might want to answer for yourself. hang in there.
 
teysmith said:
Trying so hard to fight this!! but this pile of ish on my head is urking the hell out of me!!! I dont know what to do with it! I've been wearing a fony pony but thats getting B-O-R-I-N-G!!! ughhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!
...let me try flat ironing this mess!!!:wallbash:
I've never looked this terrible in my life!!!!!
Click to expand...

Don't do it. I've been transitioning since April. For 2 months I had braids, and for the remainder of the months I've just got it flat ironed with one or two tracks and it is banging.

Go to someone who specializes in transitioning and they'll hook you up.
 
Why should ONE comment bother you? Everyone has an opinion and you don't have to agree with strangers or even care what they think.

Moving on to more important issues, I got your reply to my message but didn't get the chance to reply. If you don't want to deal with yout hair right now, get cornrows (extensions), which should be much cheaper than individuals, for a short while to give you time to decide what you want to do - relax or continue transitioning.

Checkout my hairstyles: http://public.fotki.com/mummysgirl/transition-to-natural/hairdos-while-trans/. If you can't cornrow, you can still use pretty headbands/scarves to lay down your new growth :yep: You can try twistouts, I think flat twists might be slightly easier to learn than cornrows... Flat twist tutorial:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYKugFF04jI

If you decide to relax, enjoy your relaxed hair and you can transition another time...

:bighug:

teysmith said:
okay..fine..I wont ask or complain anymore about my hair anymore.... as a matter a fact I'll stay off the hair forum and hang out in some of the others...maybe the off topic section....:sad:
Click to expand...
 
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