Do you feel insulted when

[venusfly]

Ladies,
I have been a lurker for a few years and have slowly and gradually been incorporating information I've gleaned from reading the posts on here into my hair care regime. I've always had a good head of hair but I must say it is much much improved since i've slowly and gradually been incorporporating things i read into my hair routine. Now, my question is this, do you feel insulted when someone assumes that because your hair looks good it's a weave or wig? And the culprit is not any one race. I've had both caucasianss and african Americas assume that my hair is a wig or weave. I find this frustrating because I made a concious decision to try to improve the health of my hair and wear my own hair rather than be dependent on a wig or weave? Has this ever happened to you? How do you feel when it does? Complimented that your hair look so good someone would mistake it for a weave or wig or angry that people have so many sterotypes about black women's hair that the asumption is a healthy attractive head of hair on a black woman MUST be a wig or weave?

 

[empressri]

No because if I got insulted for every silly assumption that a person made about anything and life in general, I wouldn't have time for eating, breathing, sleeping...hell, blinking.

I got weaved checked in the damn carol's daughter store. Come on, now. Selling stuff for natural hair and chick was all up in my head and then asked if it was mine.

 

[FrazzledFraggle]

Ladies,
I have been a lurker for a few years and have slowly and gradually been incorporating information I've gleaned from reading the posts on here into my hair care regime. I've always had a good head of hair but I must say it is much much improved since i've slowly and gradually been incorporporating things i read into my hair routine. Now, my question is this, do you feel insulted when someone assumes that because your hair looks good it's a weave or wig? And the culprit is not any one race. I've had both caucasianss and african Americas assume that my hair is a wig or weave. I find this frustrating because I made a concious decision to try to improve the health of my hair and wear my own hair rather than be dependent on a wig or weave? Has this ever happened to you? How do you feel when it does? Complimented that your hair look so good someone would mistake it for a weave or wig or angry that people have so many sterotypes about black women's hair that the asumption is a healthy attractive head of hair on a black woman MUST be a wig or weave?

You could either take it as a compliment or as an insult. It depends on how you look at it.

 

[**SaSSy**]

I don't give a blank if people think its weave, I take it now as a compliment.

Sent from my lavish iPhone

 

[Successfulmiss]

First, thank you for your honest post! Always feel welcome to post. I would be honored if I were weave checked. I get checked all the time. No big deal after a while. One of the major reasons I do not let it bother me is because I had a friend in HS that had really low self esteem and cut her hair because she was tired of it being mistaken for weave. While I am not comparing you to her(as that was an extreme case) do not let it get you down. **Grow baby grow**

 

[Seamonster]

Lol, I think I would be really excited if someone weave checked me. That would be big progress.

 

[whiteoleander91]

I don't think I would be...I've never been weave checked. Must be exciting lol

 

[Lylddlebit]

I can't feel insulted when someone thinks my hair is fake especially since I wore fake hair the majority of my life. I don't understand feeling insulted when someone believes you are following your normal routine. I do understand being insulted when a passive aggressive attack is posed as a question though.

 

[proudmommyoftwo0911]

I love being weave checked, shoot I ask them do they want to check! Lol! The fact that I'm getting weave checked reminds me that I'm doing something right and defining the odds that black women can have long healthy hair.

 

[greenandchic]

I've been weave, wig, phony pony, fake bun, fake puff, jheri curl, texturizer, etc checked at one point or another. I take weave, phony pony, etc checks a complement, not so much the curl and texturizer one because it usually follows with a "are you mixed?" or "...Indian?" question with talks about "good grade of hair, etc".

All in all, I must be doing something right if they question the legitimacy of my hair and I don't think my hair is even all that!

 

[lolascurls]

I take it as a compliment when someone mistakes my bun for a phony! It means they can't believe black women can have full and long enough hair to make one!
Now they know!

 

[napbella]

I take it as a compliment because most people think fake hair is prettier than what we can grow (unless they frequent hair boards and are healthy hair knowledgeable). Most peeps think my braidouts/twistouts are fake and they are typically only just past sl BUT they are lush

 

[sunnieb]

Yep, my braidouts and ponies get 'em everytime!

I take it as a compliment though.

 

[Ogoma]

It is complimentary because they think my hair is nice and it is also insulting because the assumption is the hair growing out of my scalp cannot be nice. I do not wear weaves or wigs. It is a classic backhanded compliment and there is no way around it. The only variable is how you choose to handle it.

 

[DominicanBrazilian82]

In my experience, its more common to see a weave than a woman with natural hair ( I live in one of the fakest capitals of the country, next to LA) Weaves are supposed to emulate the look, feel and texture of "natural" hair, so it's pretty normal to confuse the two (at least a good weave should). Not everyone has weave radar (I do ). If the ratios were higher, less people would inquire because it wouldn't matter. Growing natural, long and luxurious hair is just that, luxurious; as is a $1000 weave and some $500 hair. Luxury is envied. So I would take it as a compliment. Swang that ish and give them a reason.

Sent from my iPhone using LHCF

 

[Napp]

If I'm getting weave checked, I'm doing something right

 

[Toy]

I take it as a compliment.

 

[browneyedgrl]

It's frustrating but I don't let it bother me anymore. I just politely correct them and keep it moving.

 

[RegaLady]

My mother weave checked me the other day as she has never seen my hair growth since I started my hair journey (I always wear a PS).

I will be honest, I was both flattered and insulted

I was flattered because she thought it was a weave meaning my hair was longer then she was used to seeing.

I was insulted because she thought it was a weave and after going through all the hassle of growing it out, people will not believe it is your real hair, lol. I had to part it down the middle for her and everything.

 

[karenjoe]

I think it's is a compliment. we cant control what people think. Our hair is give to us by our parents..... if my hair look so good people think it's a wigs, etc. my Dad would be sooo proud..... ( family joke)
then Moms side will say it came from her side of the family...
I wear wigs a lot
when I'm wearing my hair if no one say anything I know its ok..

 

[caribeandiva]

If I'm getting weave checked, I'm doing something right

 

[southerncitygirl]

i don't get weave checked but when i get my hair flat-ironed ppl think i got a relaxer or that it was an extreme or complicated process to straighten it (usually yt folks). i have had yt folks eye me hard like they want to ask if i have a weave, but me thinks they know better i say all this to say that we live in a time where healthy hair on any woman is rare and practically any & everybody wears weaves, wigs, clip-ins, etc.... so don't take offense. i know at times it can be annoying but take it as a compliment and keep it moving whatever you are doing stick to it and continue growing your hair as long and as healthy as you like

 

[naturalmanenyc]

I'd take it as a compliment. My hair has been BSL (relaxed) and I am aiming for that length as a natural.

I recall this guy gushing over my hair as I waited for a ride a couple of years ago. He went on and on about how Black women don't usually let their hair grow so long and he was so "proud" of me for growing out my hair.

It was an 18 inch fusion weave. lol lol lol

I'm pretty sure I had a very deep part too so you could see a lot of my scalp. It was a compliment to my hair stylist and to me since it blended so well

 

[ilong]

It doesn't bother me at all. I am who I am and do what I want. Now if somebody was taking care of me - they MIGHT have a thing or two to say - otherwise their comments mean zilch to me.

On the other hand because I wear weaves 95% of the time - I am sure that - when I "come out" (in 2 years) and swang my MBL (I pray) hair - I pray that I WILL get weaved checked. Outside of my family and hair stylists - no one in my circles (work, skating, dancing) has ever seen my hair. I am praying that I give them a head full of MBL to look at in 2 years.

Don't be insulted by someone's "disbelief" of your accomplishments. Otherwise you may feel compelled to respond (action, deed or word) to it. And it serves no purpose. The other person still won't have long, beautiful, thick,luxurious, healthy heair like yours. Which is the root of the insult anyway.

 

[kandiekj100]

I don't have many people check me, but I did have own sister wig check me one time. I was tickled, b/c like I said it just never happens.

If it happened all the time, idk, maybe i'd be a little frustrated, but I guess like the others have stated, just look at as you have you have been doing something right.

 

[Solitude]

I used to wear my hair in a jet-black bob & it was so full and even that people thought it was a wig. I always took it as a compliment. Come to think of it, I get more compliments when my hair is SL.

I had a lot of family in town this weekend and several of my male relatives asked me if my hair was a weave...