From Setback to Comeback - An Encouragement Thread

[Jeech]

I once bought an expensive weave and had it put on by a friend This after having been wearing braids back to back without any time out

It gets better...

I got so tired of the weave after about 3 weeks and there was no one around to help me out so I just took a pair of scissors and cut the weave off and part of my hair unknowingly.

I swore off weaves and microbraids and now I have learned to DC more often and to moisturize more often.

Thank goodness for this site and all you wonderful ladies and your support.

 

[mahogany_horizons]

Nice idea!

I started from here in August 2007:


A year and 2 trims later, I got here in August 2008 and was so excited:




December 2008, I relaxed my hair and my hair was a mess! It was so many different lengths - SL, APL, between APL and BSL! I couldn't understand why, I didn't do length checks while stretching and was so busy so wasn't paying attention to my hair to notice if there was any breakage. I took some pictures and never put them on my fotki - I was so sad. I finally took a picture and made a comparison pic AFTER I got a cut. I saw some locks of hair that were more than 3 inches on the stylist's floor

Comparison picture below (after the cut):


I finally realised what the main culprits were:
1. I moved home and was very busy - I didn't wash or DC my hair for 2 weeks, I work out 5 days a week. I was manipulating my sweaty hair by combing and trying to style it for these 2 weeks and I wasn't cleaning it!!!
2. I wasn't coating my already relaxed hair with conditioner or oil on relaxer days so during my last relaxer, my already weak, uncared for strands just couldn't handle relaxer being rinsed through them.

Now... 8 months later, my hair is doing so well. I'm kinda glad I had that setback because it made me realise I could get back to that length again, and longer if I wanted! But I also realised I was bored, I'd been saying I'd go natural in the "near future".... well, in February of this year, at 7 weeks post, the near future was now. I decided to transition I'm almost 8 months post and my hair is doing so well. I haven't straightened in a long time so I don't know my length but I think I might be APL in some areas! I did a braidout last weekend and my friend who has longer-than-APL hair kept saying my hair looked so nice and long. Ofcourse I was happy

My hair now (braidout with ends curled and 7.5 months of shrinkage):


Can you tell I love my hair now??? This was the only large picture

Mistakes happen, setback happen.... we learn from them When you have setbacks, sit back and figure out what you've done differently - these things are the most likely culprit. If it's not your hair care practices that changed, it could be health related or stress - get a check up.

I'm now looking forward to getting back to APL but this time, all natural!

HHG

Your twist out is VERY PRETTY!

 

[southerncitygirl]

I didn't realize it but about 2.5 yrs ago I was going to a girl for a whole year and getting weaves and because of the way she braided I didn't retain any length I had split ends that would get trimmed away when I got my hair flat ironed by my main hair stylist. On a couple od occasions while taking out my weave she also cut my hair in a few places(was able to camoflauge it) I switched to wigs and have been retaining length ever since. Small braids don't equal a flatter weave and referrals from other folks for stylists almost always end in disaster for me. My main stylist who helped me transistion is who I see for flat ironing and dusting a few times a year and no one else.

 

[Mz.Perfect]

I had my son in 2008. I had a very hard pregnancy and gained over 100 lbs. I stop all my regimens and just stared box braiding my hair and nothing else. My hair grew but, because I wasn't taking care of it it got damaged. I damaged my side from braiding my edges too tight. When I say damaged I mean my edges were bald. My ends were very split and I had a very bad case of shedding. I could acutally pull one strand of hair into two pieces. When I would wash my hair it would end up looking like a cotton ball. I had to use tons of heat to get them straight and as soon as a stepped outside "poof". I cut all the poofy ends off a few months after I had my son, but my hair was still in bad shape. I've decided to get my hair and new mommy body (Uhhhh) back in order. I got rid of the extra 100 lb and now I'm getting rid of the bad hair problem. I chopped it all off! My goal for 2010 is a healthier overall me.

 

[Pooks]

I'm seeing a common theme in these most recent posts... It's so important to add best practice to a little bit of knowledge! Having braids/weave is great for protective styling purposes, but install or remove incorrectly or carelessly and you're just asking for trouble.

Reminds me of a time after I just started my HHJ when I just KNEW I'd found the answer to all my hair issues: my hair needed moisture moisture moisture and lots of it, so what did I do? Moisturised+sealed, DC'd and then did overnight whole head baggying. My hair was a soft mushy mess, overmoisturised and breaking off like baby heather with every stroke of the comb. I was horrified, talk about a wake up call

 

[Pooks]

Bumping this old thread to share I am enjoying my best hair ever. I'm on my way!

A pic of my afro last year after heat damage - note the thin, breaking ends in comparison with the much thicker roots:
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Recent takedown after mini plaits - no more heat damage, good retention and thickness!
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More pics in my fotki. I love documenting my hair journey! Just yesterday I was looking at where I began, and comparing it to where my hair is and is going now, I'm sooo happy. Stretched the longest layer of my hair is now somewhere near the bottom of my shoulder blades! What took me here is cutting out heat completely - my hair doesn't react well to heat and I previously abused it. Other positive contributing factors include consistency with my vitamin regimen (Biotin and MSM, as well as Chlorella and the WL egg shake), low manipulation long-term protective styles like plaits, twists and canerows (no hair added), all natural hari products and regular cleansing and conditioning of my hair.

I have length check photos from last December when I joined this year's Bootcamp Challenge (yeah I've been MIA from the site so haven't checked in for ages, I better head over there...) I can't wait to do an official length check comparison at the end of the year.

Keep posting your comebacks ladies, you never know who you'll encourage or inspire!

 

[shunemite]

Yeah.... I joined the braid challenge, retained a lot of hair and then just last week the braider I PAID to take down my hair chopped off like 4 inches of where she "thought" my hair stopped

I'm seeing a common theme in these most recent posts... It's so important to add best practice to a little bit of knowledge! Having braids/weave is great for protective styling purposes, but install or remove incorrectly or carelessly and you're just asking for trouble.

So true so true so true.

Keep posting your comebacks ladies, you never know who you'll encourage or inspire!

I'm encouraged today by you and your pictures, inspired and uplifted. I'm subscribing to this thread. Thanks to you and all the other ladies for sharing your stories, I needed to read this.

 

[Pooks]

Thanks for sharing shunemite, you'll regain that length soon and be on your way!

 

[bride91501]

OMG VeePickni - your progress is so inspirational! Your ends look fabulous now, and the progress from last year will definitely inspire and motivate other sisters.

 

[transitioning?]

Going through bad setbacks right now. When I first started my journey my left side was only 2 inches long and still is very short and broken. Now the right side some area in the crown, and the nape have broken off. It's so bad sometimes I would look at my hair in the mirror and want to cry.

The parts are growing back just VERY slowly. I am NL right now and will be cutting it to my ears, thats how badly it broke off. I'm wearing wigs for a year and trying not to think about the damage and just focus on something else.

And what broke it off? A stylist brunt my hair with the pressing comb when I was natural, that side stayed broken off for like 3 years now. The others spots were caused my stylists not washing out the perm properly and it broke down to the ng.

I'm trying not be discouraged but it's so hard. I see soooo many women with healthy hair and I just dont understand why this is so hard for me. I havent been SL since I was 14 my hair just keeps breaking off.

My friend says I focus on my hair too much and thats why it's not growing. He's probably right. Since I was 5, I was told how horrible my hair was/is so I guess it has given me a complex..

Thanks for letting me vent.

It's been over a year. How is your hair now? Did you keep up with the wigs?

 

[Pooks]

OMG VeePickni - your progress is so inspirational! Your ends look fabulous now, and the progress from last year will definitely inspire and motivate other sisters.

Thanks so much hun!

I've been loving your siggy by the way, Dec 2012, just wait, lol!

 

[PocketVenus]

This thread is awesome. I'm dealing with breakage at the moment. I straightened my hair about a month ago and realized like a week after that my hair started breaking, really badly. I have fine hair and don't really use heat that often, but I've figured out that my hair really doesn't like direct heat...at all (in hindsight). So I upped my moisture and some protein, though not a lot and that helped a little bit. It helped a little bit, as in, the length of the breaking strands has decreased. Before, I felt like my hair was falling out and now it's like half an inch of the end of the strand that's breaking. The amount of the breakage is still a lot and after examining the strands that are still breaking, I noticed that it is extremely elastic, which I assume means it's over moisturized (am I right?). I'm increasing the frequency I do my henna treatments and am going to incorporate raw eggs and neutral protein filler until i find the right balance and my hair stops breaking
I'm also trimming regularly. My ends are for shame.

 

[metro_qt]

i've just experienced a MAJOR setback, going from waistlength to Apl...
Its so disheartning... I've been wearing wigs for about 4 years, and getting great growth and thickness... Texturizing every so often.

One day last year the two different textures collided when I was in the shower, and they dredded up... (yes this happened to me once before, which is why i resorted to wigs in the first place)

I still washed, conditioned as usual, but could not detangle all of the matts and clumps, especially behind my back... I got really sad, and then started just getting lazy with my hair.

My mother ended up detangling/cutting everything for me and now i'm back at APL.

I'm lucky i still have hair left on my head. I will try and post a picture.

 

[Pooks]

Oh wow metro_qt, I'm sorry, well at least you know your PS wig regimen works and will get your inches back.

 

[asakeba]

I'm recovering from a set back...
In brief: Went to a stylist who decided to use some homemade relaxer on my hair. I reacted badly to it, my scalp itched and itched and I kept scratching away. Eventually my hair broke off. The damage was probably coupled with my poor hair management practices. I had full NL hair at the time. I had to cut all my hair off at the back into a tapered cut. It was then that I saw the true extent of the damage.

I was heartbroken. I researched and researched to find a solution to my problems and came upon LHCF. I've been wigging and co-washing since. A year later, here I am

I have very slow growing hair and after a year, I only have 4-5 inches at the back. Plus I've never been beyond full SL in my life. Hopefully, I'll get there next year.

 

[shunemite]

Plus I've never been beyond full SL in my life. Hopefully, I'll get there next year.

I commend you for sharing your story and taking pictures. My set back is nothing compared to yours! I'm so sorry that this happened to you. I think that with all the wealth of knowledge on this forum that we are fortunate to have, you will certainly see growth and retention in 2011. Sending you a hug.

 

[havilland]

hugs for asakeba! been there. done that. i don't have pics because it was waaaaaay before i was doing all that, but the middle of my hair broke off just lke yours due to over processing. my hair was a mess for over a year. i just left it alone. it wasnt' enough hair to do anything to so i was forced to just leave it. i co washed daily. once i got enough hair in the middle to put it in a ponytail, i did. i kept it bunned up for about a year. it took me two years total to recover. cowashing and rollersetting helped me recover but it took a long time. keep your head up! your hair progress so far is good!!!


my other major setback is from pregnancy. i was growing fine until i delivered my son and then breastfed him for a year. the hormones made my edges fall out, my hair was weak and thin. just a mess. lots of tlc, patience and taking pictures (so i could see what worked) helped me recover. took about 6 months to see progress then another year or so to recover. my hair is still not as thick as before the pregnancy so i had to adopt a whole new hair regimine.

pics are in my fotki.