Help!!!I'm getting discouraged with natural journey.....(Long)

[ajoke]

Hi every one, this is my first thread on LHCF. I have learned sooo much, and I haven't been to a hair salon in over a year! I would be so grateful if you could please give me some advice.

My last relaxer was 29.12.08. I transitioned for over a year in sew-ins and braids, mainly because every time I washed my hair between hair-dos, dealing with the two textures was really difficult. I have had issues with my hairline forever,and I had even stopped relaxing that part of my head for over a year before starting to transition. Anyway, I BC'd on January 30th 2010, and was left at NL. I had a sew in directly after my BC, because I had an interview, and wanted to look good.

I took the weave off a few weeks ago and have been keeping my hair in corn-rows under my wig since then, mosturising twice a day, co-washing in corn-rows once a week. Two weeks ago I blow dried and flat ironed, It looked nice, but was too short for me to do much with it. Last week, I airdried in a twist and curl, but the twistout didn't look nice, so I cornrowed the hair with a bit of ORS lock and twist gel and shea butter. On wednesday, I co-washed with HH, and then redid the corn-rows(about 8 cornrows) adding a bit of HH as leave in.

Today, I debated washing and DCing in the corn-rows but decided to take them off and wash in four puffs, when I took the corn rows off, the hair was really well defined and nice and could have stayed at least another day as a corn-row out, but I decided to wash anyway. I tried to lightly detangle every section as I undid the corn rows, but my hair was dry and a bit brittle, so I left it. I dampened my hair, added my Brazil nut moisture mask pre-poo from The Body shop, detangled with a large comb, there was a bit of breakage, more than last week when I prepooed with Amla oil. After 30 minutes, I washed my hair with Aubrey organics white camelia shampoo(I usually use the phytojoba shampoo, but decided to try the white camelia). Before shampooing, with the mask not yet rinsed off, I combed using a seamless wide-toothed comb and I had a lot of breakage!!!
I decided to DC with a mixture of AO GBP and the Aphogee mosturising conditioner with heat for 30 mins under a hooded dryer.

I really like my natural hair texture, I'm a 4a and I didn't think my hair could ever be this managable. I got my first relaxer at 13 after stressing my mom out, before then my hair was classified 'very stubborn' by the hairdressers who put my corn-rows in(we had to corn-row our hair weekly at my girls school). In retrospect, I realise that my hair was not being properly moisturised - we only shampooed and never conditioned the hair at home, sometimes used coconut oil, but mostly greases etc.
As an adult, I had previously tried going natural pre-LHCF but after battling my hair for a while usually caved-in and got a relaxer. With a relaxer and weekly DCs, I got to armpit length. The only problem was that I didn't know how to do my hair at home so that it looked nice(if only I knew about twist-outs etc then). My hair became unmanageable 4 weeks post relaxer and I had to relax at max. 6 weeks interval or else, my hair would start breaking. That and my hairline issues are the reasons I decided to go natural.

I can't do wash and gos, I tried and my hair tangled really badly, it coils very tightly at the ends and . My twist outs don't look too cute, when I get my hair braided or a sew-in, I get a lot of breakage around my hairline because the styles are too tight (which has started to fill in slowly I must say!).
Today, I discovered that corn-row outs might be my thing, but if my hair keeps breaking so badly, I am afraid I will not retain any length, please tell me what I am doing wrong. BTW, when I wet my hair today, I saw that some ends still looked straight in spite of the fact that I have cut several times. I have decided to let them be, but could they be contributing to my breakage? I also think I need to keep my regimen a bit simpler.......

 

[GreenD]

I'm sorry you may have posted this but what are you moisturizing your hair with twice a day?

 

[ajoke]

Thanks for your reply. I use a spritz made of distilled water, aloe vera gel and a bit of honeysuckle rose conditioner and a tiny bit of olive oil. Then I rub a little bit of oil, mainly jojoba or sometimes castor oil all over, especially my thin edges.

 

[Miss AJ]

Well you won't get better at twist outs if you don't keep practicing and perfecting them. There are lots of video tutorials for natural hairstyles on YouTube so even if twist outs DON'T work for you, you don't have to restrict yourself to just one or two styles. Also, are you using any type of protein products in your regimen? Protein in moisture go hand in hand, you can't have healthy hair without both of them.

 

[GreenD]

Are you sure it's breaking or shedding? Have you tried bagging your hair? If it's dry and breaking you need more moisture and bagging should help to resolve this.

 

[Maracujá]

Well you won't get better at twist outs if you don't keep practicing and perfecting them. There are lots of video tutorials for natural hairstyles on YouTube so even if twist outs DON'T work for you, you don't have to restrict yourself to just one or two styles. Also, are you using any type of protein products in your regimen? Protein in moisture go hand in hand, you can't have healthy hair without both of them.

I wanted to ask this too, that's very important. You should read Sistaslick's article on that.

 

[ajoke]

Well, I used to use the ORS cholesterol or motions CPR conditioner weekly. My hair got a bit hard after airdrying so I assumed I was having a protein overload, especially my hair being natural now, so I decided to use more moisture DCs. I still use Aubrey organics GBP conditioner every two weeks because I read somewhere that it is a light protein conditioner. do you think I need more protein? I once did an egg/aphogee 2 step treatment, but to be honest, I didn't notice too much difference.

 

[Miss AJ]

Well, I used to use the ORS cholesterol or motions CPR conditioner weekly. My hair got a bit hard after airdrying so I assumed I was having a protein overload, especially my hair being natural now, so I decided to use more moisture DCs. I still use Aubrey organics GBP conditioner every two weeks because I read somewhere that it is a light protein conditioner. do you think I need more protein? I once did an egg/aphogee 2 step treatment, but to be honest, I didn't notice too much difference.

Being natural doesn't mean you are more likely to get protein overload. My natural hair LOVES protein, I don't overdo it, but I make sure it's getting a nice dose of protein throughout the week. What did you moisturize with after you used the protein DC? And it's best to alternate protein and moisture DCs every week. I can't tell YOU if your hair needs more protein but if you are using only moisturizing products right now I could venture to guess you may need to add some protein to your product rotation. My hair was breaking off A LOT after I BCed and I couldn't figure out why, but once I added a protein shampoo/leave-in/DC to my stash, I stopped seeing broken hairs all over my shower floor. Even though I was using the Aphogee 2 step protein treatment every 6 weeks, that by itself was not enough to remedy my breakage issues.

 

[ajoke]

Being natural doesn't mean you are more likely to get protein overload. My natural hair LOVES protein, I don't overdo it, but I make sure it's getting a nice dose of protein throughout the week. What did you moisturize with after you used the protein DC? And it's best to alternate protein and moisture DCs every week. I can't tell YOU if your hair needs more protein but if you are using only moisturizing products right now I could venture to guess you may need to add some protein to your product rotation. My hair was breaking off A LOT after I BCed and I couldn't figure out why, but once I added a protein shampoo/leave-in/DC to my stash, I stopped seeing broken hairs all over my shower floor. Even though I was using the Aphogee 2 step protein treatment every 6 weeks, that by itself was not enough to remedy my breakage issues.

Could you please tell me which the protein products apart from the aphogee. Do you like use all protein products one week and all moisture products the next? And do you cowash?

 

[Miss AJ]

I like Optimum Anti-Breakage Stay Strong shampoo, and even though it is a protein, it doesn't leave my hair stripped and I can detangle very easily after I rinse it out. I also like the Aphogee Keratin and Green Tea Restructerizer leave-in but I only use that on wash days, and I mix a little Infusium 23 into my moisturizing leave-in sprays. I'm trying to get into the whole moisture week/protein week thing with my products but until I get that down I just go off of how my hair feels and other factors....like I normally use a protein DC every week but since it's gotten cold again AND it decided to snow today, I'm DCing with a moisture DC right now. I used to co-wash but now I don't do it very often because some days I use gel and conditioner alone won't cut it. I do co-wash after work outs if I havent used any heavy products, otherwise I'll use a gentle moisturizing shampoo and quick conditioner.

 

[SignatureBeauty]

I am sorry you are going thru this, it will get better for you, my natural hair hates protein, it makes my hair hard and dry, my hair also hates oils & shea butter. Have you tried just conditioner washes and using s-curl? that is a good cheap combo that might work for you! whatever you try, Good Luck and I hope it works out for your hair!

 

[ajoke]

I am sorry you are going thru this, it will get better for you, my natural hair hates protein, it makes my hair hard and dry, my hair also hates oils & shea butter. Have you tried just conditioner washes and using s-curl? that is a good cheap combo that might work for you! whatever you try, Good Luck and I hope it works out for your hair!

Thanks! I haven't tried S-curl. Isn't it full of silicone or something? Or are the silicones in it the 'good' ones?

 

[Curly Lee]

try, try try again. That's the best advice I can give. It sounds like you need to try different combinations of moisturizers and styles before you can find what works for you. You can look on youtube or LHCF for suggestions but ultimately you have to find what works on your hair through trial and error.

 

[vkb247]

Well, I used to use the ORS cholesterol or motions CPR conditioner weekly. My hair got a bit hard after airdrying so I assumed I was having a protein overload, especially my hair being natural now, so I decided to use more moisture DCs. I still use Aubrey organics GBP conditioner every two weeks because I read somewhere that it is a light protein conditioner. do you think I need more protein? I once did an egg/aphogee 2 step treatment, but to be honest, I didn't notice too much difference.

I know that Motions CPR has silicones in it and when I use most products with cones my hair will dry hard. Maybe that was the problem.

If you are moisturizing twice a day and your hair is still dry than maybe its time to rething your products. Have you tried Taliah Waajid Protective Mist Bodifier or Kinky Curly Knot Today? Those are two popular leave ins that also have great ingredients.

 

[SignatureBeauty]

Thanks! I haven't tried S-curl. Isn't it full of silicone or something? Or are the silicones in it the 'good' ones?

I don't think it has cones in it, I am gonna have to read my bottle again, or you could try Hawaiian Silky 14 in 1, Now I ALSO LIKE The s-curl texturizing spray it is in a blue and grey bottle, or designer touch texturizing spray. It seems to keep my hair soft I had to use Products that were for Jherri Curls, or online product from qhemet biologics because other products did not work.

Get you a good deep conditioner and do that weekly as well! Your hair will be fine, just don't give up yet!! Maybe you could also try the Baking Soda rinse to cleanes your hair and scalp and then use your conditioner. But you have alot of good suggestion from the Ladies!!!

 

[CarolinaGal]

IMHO the Brazil Nut Mask has some questionable ingredients. The ingredients that I have bolded always cause problems for me and make my hair dry and brittle. Do your other products have any of these ingredients? If not, maybe you can try a different DC. I'm not trying to turn you inot a PJ or anything, but when I read that you use this product I was instantly alarmed because I tried it once and had problems with it myself. Good luck!

Water (Solvent/Diluent), Sesamum Indicum (Sesame) Seed Oil (Emollient), Cetearyl Alcohol (Emulsifier), Bertholletia Excelsa (Brazil) Nut Oil (Emollient), Stearic Acid (Emulsifier), Lanolin (Emollient) -- Wax, Olea Europaea (Olive) Fruit Oil (Emollient), Ceteareth-20 (Emulsifier), Amodimethicone (Hair Conditioning Agent) -- not water soluable to but not supposed to build-up , Fragrance (Fragrance), Glycerin (Humectant), Honey (Natural Additive), Propylene Glycol (Humectant), Steartrimonium Methosulfate (Antistatic Agent), Benzyl Alcohol (Preservative), Methylparaben (Preservative), Isopropyl Alcohol (Solvent), Aminomethyl Propanol (pH Adjuster), Propylparaben (Preservative), Wheat Amino Acids (Hair Conditioning Agent), Sodium Chloride(Viscosity Modifier)-- NaCL/Salt, Cetrimonium Chloride (Hair Conditioner), Trideceth-12 (Surfactant), Disodium EDTA (Chelating Agent), Tocopherol (Antioxidant), Phenoxyethanol (Preservative), Potassium Sorbate (Preservative).

 

[ajoke]

Update: I decidedto start from scratch, so to say.
I washed today with Redken hair cleansing cream, a chelating shampoo. After that, I DC'd with Redken extreme rescue treatment, a protein DC, w/out heat for about 20 minutes. I put some Wave noveau mosturising lotion as leave in, with a bit of Chi silk infusion did 8 twists and stayed under the hooded dryer for 20 mins. Afterwards, hair still slightly damp at the roots, I used some wheat germ oil and argan oil to corn row my hair into two fat corn rows. I used the wheat germ oil and argan oil with a bit of ORS lock and twist gel to corn row the hair at my hairline.
My hair feels stronger, there was much less breakage than on Saturday but my hair is not as soft.
I considered doing a moisturising DC afterwards, but decided to limit myself to mosturising leave ins.
I will use the redken shampoo every two weeks and the protein DC too. in between I'll use my phytojoba shampoo and herbal essenses hello hydration treatment.

 

[Whimsy]

Sounds like a decent plan. I"m glad you didn't just give up and relax!
Moisture after protein keeps my hair from feeling hard, maybe that'll help too with the 'not so soft' feeling?