I Feel Like a Newbie Again... HELP!

[KiSseS03]

Hi ladies... I hope you can help me out with this...

I've been a regular member of LHCF since 2005, I got serious about my hair around that time, and by August 2008 (after flip flopping between relaxed and natural many times, along with many cuts) I fiiinnnaaallllyyyy reached my goal of BSL length hair.

Well it's almost all gone now, and I'm really upset about it. My avater is from early 2008, and my hair has broken off to lengths much shorter than that. All of the breakage is in the back, some areas are still around APL, others SL and NL and today I discovered whole chunks of hair that are only about 4 inches long, in the middle of my head.

I had a deep trim about 2 weeks ago, but it doesn't seem to be helping, my hair seems to have thinned out even more, so I've ruled out my ends as the source of the problem.

My last relaxer was back in mid July 2008, and my hair was absolutely fine until September. I used Mizani Mild and only texturized my hair. A stylist back in Sept 2007 over-processed my hair, so maybe the texture difference between that first relaxer and the 2 subsequent ones made the difference.

I don't know, I just feel very lost, I don't know this hair on my head at all anymore. LOL... I honestly feel like I've been kicked out of the girls with pretty hair club.

I'm considering just cutting it all of into a short style, I'm just scared of the upkeep since I'm transitioning. Additionally, I have my GRADUATION pictures to worry about in the coming weeks so I don't want a style that's so trendy I'll be like, "what was I thinking?" when I look back at the pics...

Help me out here ladies!!

 

[SimpleKomplexity]

We all have setbacks. Don't feel alone. At times I even still feel like i newbie, and I've been here for a year but it seems like forever. I would baby my hair before cutting it. If yous till want to have a sheek graduation look, you can always get a few tracks for length and fullness. That's what I did for my pics, and I adore them! HTH

 

[hopeful]

I feel so sad reading your story. Did you try any new products since your last relaxer, new conditioner or shampoo? It doesn't sound like the relaxer because it sounds like your were fine almost two months later. Are you under a lot of stress? Are you on any new medications? Try not to panic and don't do anything drastic until after your graduation pictures. Maybe you can have a few pieces sewn in to fill in the broken spots for when you take the pictures. Since you are planning on going natural, after that I would consider bc'ing or transitioning for awhile with either braids or wigs. I pray everything will turn out okay.

ETA: to send you a cyber .

 

[KiSseS03]

We all have setbacks. Don't feel alone. At times I even still feel like i newbie, and I've been here for a year but it seems like forever. I would baby my hair before cutting it. If yous till want to have a sheek graduation look, you can always get a few tracks for length and fullness. That's what I did for my pics, and I adore them! HTH

Thanks lady... Adding some tracks in an idea I hadn't thought of, I think I will do that!

As far as cutting my hair, I honestly just can't stand broken/damaged hair on my head. I'd rather it just be short and healthy. It's seriously getting annoying seeing my hair all over the bathroom floor

I feel so sad reading your story. Did you try any new products since your last relaxer, new conditioner or shampoo? It doesn't sound like the relaxer because it sounds like your were fine almost two months later. Are you under a lot of stress? Are you on any new medications? Try not to panic and don't do anything drastic until after your graduation pictures. Maybe you can have a few pieces sewn in to fill in the broken spots for when you take the pictures. Since you are planning on going natural, after that I would consider bc'ing or transitioning for awhile with either braids or wigs. I pray everything will turn out okay.

ETA: to send you a cyber .

Aww you're so sweet, thanks for the hug! I haven't used any new products at all, and you're right it is weird that my hair has been fine for 2 months.

I have been under a lot of stress... but does that actually cause breakage? This is not shedding, the hair is breaking off from the middle of the strands. I'm soo confused.

The track idea for my grad pics is a really good idea though. Thank God the front of my hair is still ok!

 

[caribgirl]

I'm so sorry to read about your breakage! You were doing so well. I'm sure that some more experienced ladies will chime in and continue to brainstorm as Hopeful and Krazy have done so far :

I agree- stress could be the culprit but how is your moisture/protein balance? What is your regimen? Are you using a lot of direct heat? Spill it, sistah

 

[BostonMaria]

I'm so sorry this happened to you!

This quote here "My last relaxer was back in mid July 2008, and my hair was absolutely fine until September. I used Mizani Mild and only texturized my hair. A stylist back in Sept 2007 over-processed my hair, so maybe the texture difference between that first relaxer and the 2 subsequent ones made the difference" makes sense and you're probably right. I don't relax my hair anymore, but back in the day between 1990-1993 I used to self-relax and my hair was long and very healthy. I let a stylist put a relaxer in my hair and in my ignorance I didn't think to ask her not to over-process, but she did and my hair broke off. From this point on you know you need to give your hair TLC.

You have this site and all the information you need in order to make your hair long and beautiful again. If you're ok with protein, I would do an Aphogee keratin treatment to stop the shedding, deep condition like crazy, and go back to self-relaxing and taking care of your hair yourself. It'll be long again before you know it! If you were able to have that beautiful hair in your avatar in the past, then you can do it again.

 

[shmmr]

I'm so sorry. I'm just (hopefully) coming out of a setback myself so I know how you're feeling. As I'm writing this, I'm saying a prayer for you, not just for your hair but for your spirit & esteem.

I don't really have any advice to offer, but do hope that others will chime in with some good advice...

 

[Eclass215]

That is upsetting. I really don't have any advice to offer other than some TLC for your hair, but I'm just here for support. And I'm sure you're still in the girls with pretty hair club!!! And your pictures will look great.

 

[tapioca_pudding]

Just wanted to point out that sometimes damage doesn't "appear" right away. Sometimes you can do something new to your hair and won't have tragic results until months down the line. So try to think back to ANYTHING you did to your hair that was out of the ordinary - a new technique, a new product, a new chemical treatment, etc.

I say this from experience; I put color/relaxer/highlights in my hair all in two days time. My hair was B.A.N.G.I.N. for about 3 months.... then it started breaking off at an amazing rate. That's what brought me to LHCF.

HTH somehow.. it's gonna be okay. @ girls with pretty hair club... no matter what, you're still part of the LHCF club.

 

[KiSseS03]

I'm so sorry to read about your breakage! You were doing so well. I'm sure that some more experienced ladies will chime in and continue to brainstorm as Hopeful and Krazy have done so far :

I agree- stress could be the culprit but how is your moisture/protein balance? What is your regimen? Are you using a lot of direct heat? Spill it, sistah

I have to admit, I'm not consistent with any particular regimen. I got lazy once I made it into the "girls with pretty hair club."

Generally I wash my hair with NTM shampoo once or twice a week. For conditioners I use the old Herbal Essences Moisturizing Conditioner and sometimes Motions CPR for protein. I use NTM leave-in and then roller-set or airdry. I rarely use heat, but I did use it a little more frequently than normal back in the summer.

 

[KiSseS03]

I'm so sorry this happened to you!

This quote here "My last relaxer was back in mid July 2008, and my hair was absolutely fine until September. I used Mizani Mild and only texturized my hair. A stylist back in Sept 2007 over-processed my hair, so maybe the texture difference between that first relaxer and the 2 subsequent ones made the difference" makes sense and you're probably right. I don't relax my hair anymore, but back in the day between 1990-1993 I used to self-relax and my hair was long and very healthy. I let a stylist put a relaxer in my hair and in my ignorance I didn't think to ask her not to over-process, but she did and my hair broke off. From this point on you know you need to give your hair TLC.

You have this site and all the information you need in order to make your hair long and beautiful again. If you're ok with protein, I would do an Aphogee keratin treatment to stop the shedding, deep condition like crazy, and go back to self-relaxing and taking care of your hair yourself. It'll be long again before you know it! If you were able to have that beautiful hair in your avatar in the past, then you can do it again.

I agree. I think it's the due to the overprocessing... it's just weird that my hair was fine for over a year... *sigh* Thanks for the hug sis!

 

[KiSseS03]

I'm so sorry. I'm just (hopefully) coming out of a setback myself so I know how you're feeling. As I'm writing this, I'm saying a prayer for you, not just for your hair but for your spirit & esteem.

I don't really have any advice to offer, but do hope that others will chime in with some good advice...

Thank you for your prayers! I honestly could feel it today at school. Awww that's what I love LHCF!

 

[KiSseS03]

That is upsetting. I really don't have any advice to offer other than some TLC for your hair, but I'm just here for support. And I'm sure you're still in the girls with pretty hair club!!! And your pictures will look great.

Thanks lady, I hope so! I love your hair btw!

Just wanted to point out that sometimes damage doesn't "appear" right away. Sometimes you can do something new to your hair and won't have tragic results until months down the line. So try to think back to ANYTHING you did to your hair that was out of the ordinary - a new technique, a new product, a new chemical treatment, etc.

I say this from experience; I put color/relaxer/highlights in my hair all in two days time. My hair was B.A.N.G.I.N. for about 3 months.... then it started breaking off at an amazing rate. That's what brought me to LHCF.

HTH somehow.. it's gonna be okay. @ girls with pretty hair club... no matter what, you're still part of the LHCF club.

This is true! Sigh... well I guess it's a learning experience. Thanks for sharing your story, I'm pretty sure it's that relaxer that did it. Now I'm even more resolved to transition.

 

[Writer100]

Thanks lady... Adding some tracks in an idea I hadn't thought of, I think I will do that!


I have been under a lot of stress... but does that actually cause breakage? This is not shedding, the hair is breaking off from the middle of the strands. I'm soo confused.

Yes, stress will cause your hair to break. I was in a very stressful job. The job wasn't hard-- the administration was. When I left and started another job I dropped 15 lbs without trying. But my hair stayed a mess so I slapped a perm in. Bad mistake. My hair came out by the handful so I braided what I had and tried to baby that along. Didn't help, in January 2008 I cut all of my hair off and started over. Then I found LHCF and now I have very thick (not very long) but soft thick hair.

Also not having enough nutrients in your system. In September 2007, I had to have a hysterectomy because I couldn't keep iron. I had fibroids that was intramuscular so I couldn't just have the surgery to remove them. I hair was horrible, my nails didn't grow, I felt horrible. I couldn't walk across the parking lot with pain in my left arm. I thought I was having a heart attack. The fact was I had no iron, and iron carries the oxygen in your system.

Get checked out by a doctor to see if you have a chemical inbalance and check your diet also. Nothing, Nothing beats good health.

God Bless You!

 

[KiSseS03]

Yes, stress will cause your hair to break. I was in a very stressful job. The job wasn't hard-- the administration was. When I left and started another job I dropped 15 lbs without trying. But my hair stayed a mess so I slapped a perm in. Bad mistake. My hair came out by the handful so I braided what I had and tried to baby that along. Didn't help, in January 2008 I cut all of my hair off and started over. Then I found LHCF and now I have very thick (not very long) but soft thick hair.

Also not having enough nutrients in your system. In September 2007, I had to have a hysterectomy because I couldn't keep iron. I had fibroids that was intramuscular so I couldn't just have the surgery to remove them. I hair was horrible, my nails didn't grow, I felt horrible. I couldn't walk across the parking lot with pain in my left arm. I thought I was having a heart attack. The fact was I had no iron, and iron carries the oxygen in your system.

Get checked out by a doctor to see if you have a chemical inbalance and check your diet also. Nothing, Nothing beats good health.

God Bless You!

Wow!! Thanks so much for sharing your story, that is valuable info. I have actually been diagnosed with low iron... way back in April. I just picked up a liquid iron supplement last week because the tablets haven't really helped.