One reason why other races think

[HoneyDew]

Two reasons:

Most of the Black women they always see has short hair

And so many of us get a weave to have longer hair

Perfect example, I was watching Smallville tonight and Eva Marcelle guest starred. In this episode, they put major extensions in her hair and she had more hair than Tyra! I mean, why couldn't they just had her guest star with her short hairdo?

And not to mention that, come on, let's be honest, the majority of Black American women do not have SL hair and below from the time they were kids to pretty much their adulthood. If we did, then this board wouldn't had been created. People are not stupid and they have been around enough Black American women to know that most of us do not have long hair. It's just the truth.

So if they see us with long hair, they assume it's a weave. I mean the ladies on this board are the exception in the Black American hair community, not the rule.

I agree. That's 's why it would not make me mad if some one thinks I have a weave. My hair is not long enough for people to think that, but I do have people comment on my hair's thickness and movement as I walk, etc. as if it is something unusual. You just don't see it as often. I would not be mad if someone questioned my hair just because of what they are used to.

I have to admit myself, when I see a sista with nice hair - thick shiny bouncy, even if it is shorter, I wonder if she is a member here. I think she just has to be one of my fellow LHCF'ers.

 

[cutebajangirl]

People can only speak from their observations and experiences. It been your observation and experience that most Black girls do not have long hair. That is your opinion, your truth. Other people living other places have different observations and experiences.

Nobody's arguing, just stating opinions drawned from their lives.

I agree with you. When I look at pics of black people from the 50's 60's and 70's when girls were staying natural and pressed, they had tons of hair. It is only once relaxers hit that you started seeing kids with toe up hair. I can even use myself and neighborhood as an example. Growing up in the 80's where all of us had relaxers by 6 most of us had messed up hair by 13, then once girls got to the age of going to hairdressers weekly (16-17) we had healthy hair again.

Now I notice that little girls dont have relaxers so early now the age is like 10-11 and I suspect those girls wont go through what me and my counterparts went though.

Again I live in NY and honestly I almost never see a black girl with toe up hair. The trend for hair here is a wash n set and so we all have healthy shoulder length or more hair. Those with shorter hair is clearly in a well cut style as opposed to broken off short hair.

 

[HoneyDew]

I agree with you. But why do we do that?

And here is another question, to tie back into the original question. Why instead of just taking care of our hair and trying to grow it out, why do we get the weave?

And why so long? That's the question that haunts me.

I ask this question as well.

Recently my sister was going through a bunch of trouble (and money) trying to buy hair and paying folks $200+ for weaves. I asked her why she waste money since she is having some financial trouble. She says - "I like myself with long hair". But, she never tries to take care of her own hair. As long as she has been wearing weaves, you wold think that she would have grown it long anyway, since some ladies do use weaves as protective styles to get to the lengths they want. Makes me think she is not really taking care of her hair the way she should with those braids. So I think, and also know from personal experience with braids, that it becomes a crutch and it is easy to just buy some hair and get a weave.

I am actually glad now that I cannot even stand braids in my hair. I used to get braids back to back without even thinking. I needed those bad boys to make me feel attractive. Don't you know that now that I just wear my own hair I get so many more compliments and attention from the opposite sex. I was brainwashed by them braids!

 

[sylver2]

IMO just the opposite is true - the majority of little black girls I see have beautiful heads of thick, longer than shoulder-length natural hair. The problems start when we get our first 'perm" to look mature. I hate to see a Mom with jacked up relaxed hair with daughthers with a head full of beautiful natural hair that you just know she will slap a perm in as soon as possible in the name of convenience!

EXACTLY..this is how it was when I was growing up. All of us had nice long thick ponytails. Then my friends started getting relaxers at age 9, 10, 11. My mother wouldn't let me get one. My friends hair was never as thick or long as it was. I finaly was able to get one at 16 and once I started taking care of my own hair it never made it past APL. It stayed shoulderlength for years and years.

 

[sylver2]

I agree with you. But why do we do that?

And here is another question, to tie back into the original question. Why instead of just taking care of our hair and trying to grow it out, why do we get the weave?

And why so long? That's the question that haunts me.

ita! When my hair broke all off and was damaged beyond fixing I had to cut it all off and start over from scratch. I wanted it to grow back healthy. I refused to get weaves or quick fixes and suffered through the shaggy dog look and the short fuzzy do. People would be like why don't u put a weave in that or something. I can wait. I was patient. I have nothing against weaves biut imho i think with them its more difficult time of getting hair where u want it to be, longer, healthier etc. And then become dependant on em...

 

[NYLegalNewbie]

Again I live in NY and honestly I almost never see a black girl with toe up hair. The trend for hair here is a wash n set and so we all have healthy shoulder length or more hair. Those with shorter hair is clearly in a well cut style as opposed to broken off short hair.

I'm going to have to disagree with you a little bit here. I live in NYC too.

I see a TON of Black women in this city with seriously jacked up hair and seriously jacked up weaves. Seriously, just go to Penn Station and walk around Herald Square or the Manhattan Mall. Jesus...

BUT, I also see a lot of Black women with beautiful, healthy hair at all lengths and in all styles (natural, relaxed, dread locks, etc).

I think there's a pretty even distribution of folks with healthy hair and unhealthy hair in this city.

 

[Kurlee]

The reason why other races think our long hair has to be a weave is because most of us don't even believe it unless we're on lhcf of course

 

[motherx2esq]

IMO, I think that the race that worries that our hair is a weave is our own. I have never had a person of another race question me about my hair or weave other than my own. When my hair is out and down every black person I know and don't know ask is that all mine. When I wear a weave I'm asked by people I mostly don't know where I got it done and what kind of hair used. I think most other races could care less what we are doing to our hair. I think we give weave a bad rep trying to pass it off as our own hair. Other races wear it too with no problem saying it's not their's. I wear weave day in and day out but my hair is also healthy underneath. I just like wearing a weave here and there.

 

[bellesocialite]

The reason why other races think our long hair has to be a weave is because most of us don't even believe it unless we're on lhcf of course

ITA! Most of the people we complain about here about 'checking for weaves' are black females. If we can't look at another black female and think it's hers, why expect someone of another race to?

 

[glamazon386]

IMO just the opposite is true - the majority of little black girls I see have beautiful heads of thick, longer than shoulder-length natural hair. The problems start when we get our first 'perm" to look mature. I hate to see a Mom with jacked up relaxed hair with daughthers with a head full of beautiful natural hair that you just know she will slap a perm in as soon as possible in the name of convenience!

I agree. And things have changed quite a bit since I was a kid. I'm only 21 but when I was a child my hair was healthy and relaxed. At it's longest it was between APL and BSL but it usually hovered at shoulder length. And my hair was usually maintained at the salon with my mother doing in between visits. But that was nothing compared all the heads in my family. Most of the little black girls at my school had their hair plaited and had a decent amount of hair. Usually around shoulder length or so. Which isn't bad compared to what you see now. Now you see Kindergarten kids with weaves. erplexed Kids are getting relaxers earlier and earlier because their moms don't know what to do with their hair. A lot of black people now just don't know how to take care or their hair nor do they want to find out. They just slap wigs and weaves and everything else on and it's really putting a bandaid on the problem instead of solving it.

 

[locabouthair]

You are so right Wheezy. My daughter is 7 and we were having a conversation about grease last weekend. I was telling her about the difference in grease and moisturizer, and she said if grease is not good than why did you used to put it in my hair. I was telling her because I thought it was good and that's what my mom put in my hair. That's when the light came on. Somebody has to teach you these things!!!

Yes definitely! if I have a daughter grease will NOT be permitted in my house. It works for some people but for me it's garbage, my hair stayed at ear length for 10 years using grease.

as far as weaves go, some people just like weaves to change up the style without damaging their hair and some use it because they really dont believe their hair an grow or they don't want to take care of it, and for some it's just a habit.

 

[Princess Pie]

I totally agree and add, Some people just don't know HOW TO TAKE CARE OF THEIR HAIR". They have been fed myths and magical grease & potions for years. At one point many people had the greasy gerry curls because their hair got longer while wearing them. (I still know some people hanging on to them)

And some people are just too lazy to do anything with their hair. I have a friend who asked me how I took care of my hair. I started telling her that I wash every three days and condition for 20 minutes... she stopped me and said "Aw, that's too much" She is so lazy that when she get tired of her weave, she pulls it out without using anything to release the glue. A good potion of hair comes out with it.

ITA.

I also think relaxers, braids, and weaves get a bad rap. In other words, they don't deserve the blame, the person misusing them does.

I know MANY people that think the can put braids/weave in their hair and forget about it. They think they can put the perm or braids in and not have to moisturize, shampoo, or conditioner their hair. Weaves, braids, and relaxers require a lot of maintenance, but most people don't know and/or care what it takes to maintain them in a healthy way.

 

[SweetCaramel1]

We live in a time of quick fixes and instant gratification and nothing is wrong with that. It just means more choices are available now than ever before.

Some ladies want to experience what it's like to have long hair without the wait and weaves provide that in just a few hours. Others want to wear weaves as a protective style while growing out their hair.

As we have discussed in past threads, having long hair can provide a sense of power or security for some so getting braids or a weave that is ultra-long is preferred by some ladies.

great post!

 

[tatiana]

When I was growing up most black girls had long thick natural healthy hair. When I look at the little black girls that live in my neighborhood, most of them of short relaxed hair with horrible ends, matted cornrows, or hair that has not seen poo and water in months, and their mothers are rocking weaves, braids, or phony ponies.

Another reason why other races think the way they do is the "My black friend/girlfriend/boyfriend told me so". Unlike other races where they are allowed to have diversity among their race, blacks are not. For example, I got into a spat with my white co-worker about hair grease. I informed him that I do not and never have put grease in my hair. He insisted I must be lying because his black girlfriend puts grease in her hair and told him that all black women put grease in their hair.

 

[lotusspecter]

I agree, most of the BLACK WOMEN you see either have short hair or weaves, but not every Black woman so it kinda bothers me when other races always assume or ask.

I((((then people started showing up one day w/ 3" of hair the next day 20",)))

I knew a lady like that...mental problems and different personalities and she had specific hair lengths for each personality...sort of "what ever happened to BabyJane/Sanctified Sunday Sister/ and someone you would never want to meet evil.....shudder... and then there was the one where she wore her hair like the style in "Blossom's avatar"...just sticking up...that was her "going round the bend to Baby Jane style....ooowwwweeee....no we were not friends but that really sticks out in my mind how you knew what kind of interaction it was going to be just by seeing the hair....so when I see others do this...I am "out of there" as this exceeds my comfort level!

bonjour

Even though I am sensitive to people with MPD, this post just cracked me up because I can mentally visualize it perfectly. Plus, any Baby Jane reference has me at hello.

Back on topic... I was admiring this girl's hair that was sitting in front of me on the campus bus the other day because it was so thick and shiny. Then I noticed she had several silver strands dispersed throughout (yes, I was all up in her hair) and I thought she had premature graying. When I saw the front of her hair, I realized it was a weave. It never occurred to me that it could be so maybe it usually doesn't to other races either. I don't know.

 

[diamondlady]

ITA.

I also think relaxers, braids, and weaves get a bad rap. In other words, they don't deserve the blame, the person misusing them does.

I know MANY people that think the can put braids/weave in their hair and forget about it. They think they can put the perm or braids in and not have to moisturize, shampoo, or conditioner their hair. Weaves, braids, and relaxers require a lot of maintenance, but most people don't know and/or care what it takes to maintain them in a healthy way.

Princess Pie, In one of my posts I did say I have nothing against a well maintained weave. I use to wear them myself as a protective style

 

[Princess Pie]

Princess Pie, In one of my posts I did say I have nothing against a well maintained weave. I use to wear them myself as a protective style

Yup. I'm agreeing with you.

 

[Barbara]

There is a popular myth that African American hair will not grow. That's why it’s prevalent to see beauty supply stores in African American neighborhoods saturated with floor to ceiling, wall to wall hair weaves, extensions, wigs, etc., especially in beauty supply stores owned by Asians. The majority of their customers are African Americans, so what else are people suppose to believe?

The Asians that I work with and the ones in my beauty salon know that some of us don't need to add hair to our head to make it long. They are astonished to see our hair gradually grow to bra clasp or waist length. They know we aren't mixed with anything.

Years ago my stylist said: "The majority of African American women think they know how to take care of their hair, but they don't. That's because they were never taught properly."

Some are just hair obsessed, and they feel that growing hair out to significant lengths is a mystery. Most African American women don't have long hair, and they find it hard to believe if a woman has long hair, then she has to be mixed with something.

 

[CocoBunny]

Two reasons:

Most of the Black women they always see has short hair

And so many of us get a weave to have longer hair

Perfect example, I was watching Smallville tonight and Eva Marcelle guest starred. In this episode, they put major extensions in her hair and she had more hair than Tyra! I mean, why couldn't they just had her guest star with her short hairdo?

And not to mention that, come on, let's be honest, the majority of Black American women do not have SL hair and below from the time they were kids to pretty much their adulthood. If we did, then this board wouldn't had been created. People are not stupid and they have been around enough Black American women to know that most of us do not have long hair. It's just the truth.

So if they see us with long hair, they assume it's a weave. I mean the ladies on this board are the exception in the Black American hair community, not the rule.

Maybe 'we' think about it more than 'they' do.

 

[me-T]

One of the contestants had a wig glued to her scalp

WTF

 

[Keshieshimmer]

Some are just hair obsessed, and they feel that growing hair out to significant lengths is a mystery. Most African American women don't have long hair, and they find it hard to believe if a woman has long hair, then she has to be mixed with something.

Sadly I still have this mind thought and I'm working hard to think otherwise. Growing up my hair was never pass my shoulders and most of my family wore elaborate hair styles, my cousin who had bra strap length hair was mixed so yeah...Joining this site has definitely helped.

Though I must admit that when I look at foki albums of women with anything but 4a/b hair I think oh they must be mixed with something or 'oh that's genetics, they don't have to work as hard to get that length or health.' I never give credit where credit is due.

I'm working on it though ladies!

 

[me-T]

^ that was a hard mindset for me to kill too cause how often do you see someone with long type 4 hair, especially if it's relaxed.

 

[ebonylocs]

Another reason why other races think the way they do is the "My black friend/girlfriend/boyfriend told me so". Unlike other races where they are allowed to have diversity among their race, blacks are not. For example, I got into a spat with my white co-worker about hair grease. I informed him that I do not and never have put grease in my hair. He insisted I must be lying because his black girlfriend puts grease in her hair and told him that all black women put grease in their hair.

Oh yes! Those self appointed ambassadors for the Black race!

 

[DivaD04]

i wish this thread wasn't so old cuz....if ya'll rememeber when one of the ladies from ANTM got on the show and said she recycles her weave, shares with her friend, and b/c she knew she was going to be on the show she got the tracks back from her friend and threw it in her head while looking a hot mess Um, I hope people don't think we ALL do that...that's just nasty and unsanitary. if a person wants to reuse their weave...don't share it. But I really really hope white folks or any others think all african americans do that trifling mess.

 

[Fine 4s]

All the Black contestants had short hair or weaves and some of the weaves looked really natural. Once some [ignorant] people of other races see something like that on TV, they think every Black woman is like these contestants.