What happened to tha sistahood of hair-growing?

[lurkersincejan]

People just use the ignore button or something, it really is not worth getting worked up for. Especially when you have never meant these people in real life, nor do you work with them. So you are not obligated to deal with them on any level. I like this board and will like to continue enjoying the positive aspects of it. And for goodness sake its sunday....YALL SHOULD BE IN CHURCH

 

[bravenewgirl87]

I noticed it, too, as of recent. It used to just be off-topic forums but now its trinkled over. If I can pick out the usual suspects then I'm sure the mods can figure who they are, too. I think its just people projecting their true feelings about black women growing long hair: Its still hard for a lot of us to believe that black women can have waist-length hair and some will try and sabotage anyone's efforts. Some people have more of a political agenda to prove here and they go out of their way to make their voices heard. That gets many members rilled up because the hair-forum is a refuge: I'm not trying to discuss if blonde hair looks good on black women or if Asian women have a hard time growing hair they way we do. Or, the negative backlash of growing your hair long. I just want a physical change in my look, but for some its deeper than that.

And, some folks are simply combative. And no ands, ifs or biggity-biggity-butts about it.

 

[LaNecia]

Hiya AprilJ!!

Now, who are you calling an "OLDIE"?!!

***spying LondonDiva's Fotki albums while I put in my kinky twists***

VWV

 

[SUZIEq]

I don't understand either.... everything seems peaceful and civil.....Let people vent a little.

I don't understand why the moderators should close this thread and not the threads were people are being attacked for their hair care practices, or views. Sometimes those threads last a couple of pages. I think the genral climate on this board has changed and someone spoke on it. I see I am going back to viewing and searching the threads because its just too much drama for my leisure time. I just want to learn about hair, and for someone to help me if they can.

 

[january noir]

People just use the ignore button or something, it really is not worth getting worked up for. Especially when you have never meant these people in real life, nor do you work with them. So you are not obligated to deal with them on any level. I like this board and will like to continue enjoying the positive aspects of it. And for goodness sake its sunday....YALL SHOULD BE IN CHURCH

Amen I know I need to be!

 

[aprilj]

Hiya AprilJ!!

Now, who are you calling an "OLDIE"?!!

***spying LondonDiva's Fotki albums while I put in my kinky twists***

VWV

You know I lubs you :wink2:.

 

[Duff]

I totally think that this is what has changed the dynamic of the board. I think a lot of people from the negative site came here and that's when I started noticing changes. This is something that we can't control though. We can only try to keep things as peaceful as we can

I agree.Hopefully they will see that thats does how we do it over here.

ITA!!! I use to be at the negative site but had to leave because it was not supportive. I've lurked here a long time and decided to go ahead and join 'officially.' I love seeing 'us' support and uplift each other. being helpful. 'girl I'm sorry that happened to you, try this' or 'I know so and so had success with this product' or whatever.

now I know everyone will not be able to get along but we can ALL CHOOSE TO BE CORDIAL. use the ignore button when you want avoid something/someone. also report it when it begins to go into a different direction. people lurking in the thread can see valid points from all, but in their debating, they lost being respectful and cordial. just step back and say, was that comment necessary. if the answer is no, then take it out. We have to remember that we are all here for happy hair growing, hair health, advise, mentoring, knowledge, support, and/or overall sisterhood!

 

[bravenewgirl87]

ITA!!! I use to be at the negative site but had to leave because it was not supportive.

What is this negative site you speak of? I've lurked at other places but I never paid attention to alot of stuff because not that many people would post.

 

[BostonMaria]

...And for goodness sake its sunday....YALL SHOULD BE IN CHURCH

 

[_belle]

I'm sorry but this is to DATE the funniest smiley I have EVER SEEN!!!!

 

[firecracker]

Lucia! girl I DONT KNOW what happened, but the whole tone is different! no respect whatsoever! personal attacks when speaking on a product, insults , character attacks, ambushes, Ive seen it all lately. I have never seen lhcf like this! its like its divided now into the 'in crowds' and now there are clicks , no sisterhood whatsoever! Those days seem to be gone! I have been shocked at what goes on here now! Really! and yeah I noticed when I came back around so many of the most beautiful positive ladies that had been here so long, arent around. I miss them and what lhcf used to be! yes this could change lhcf drastically! and many would not want to be here for whats been going on lately! who would?

Ya'll just noticed this two plus years after the fact?

 

[firecracker]

its hard to ingnore and ambush and character assasinations even lies being told on you!

F'em and feed'em fish chica!

 

[Je Ne Sais Quoi]

Hi Lucia ,

I agree with your original post, and that's why I just stay in lurk mode most of the time, if I'm on at all. LHCF is the only hair board worth visiting (for information) but the drama...

VWV

Look at VW!!!! Haven't seen you around these parts in a month of Sundays

 

[JewelleNY]

I haven't been in the hairboards too much for a while so I missed a lot of the negativity (thank goodness) , but it's definitely alive in the other boards (i.e. Entertainment and Off Topic). I HAVE noticed that many of the "old heads" have long looooong healthy hair, so obviously you guys are doing something right, and I would love to keep hearing from you. Please don't let anyone drive you away, we have much to learn from you.

ITA with you Jamilia

My sis referred me here initially and it felt like such a nice friendly group of black women that I was so excited to join. I look at some of the "older" ladies who have been my hair idols and am amazed to see how long their hair is. Yet, I do not see them post as much and many of these newer posters seem only to be here for drama and negativity.

This board has not only helped me achieve long hair but it has helped inspire me to be a better person as far as health both spiritually and physically. I agree that I see this more in the OT and Enterrtainment threads where I usually post. I am sorry to hear that this has been occurring on the hair boards as well.

 

[_belle]

im not even saying either "side" is correct because I totally understand everyone's reason for being "upset" or their opinions or whatever. . . but all of this "ole country" and "when I was coming up. . ." and "back in the day" stuff makes me as a mostly newbie not feel wanted. . . as oldies, ya'll DO realize that MOST of the people that were here with u when u joined, are gone right? like they reached their goal and/or found what worked for them or quit, and LEFT! so wishing it was only the old people on here will have like 7 people and 3 mods, and I guess u will just type to one another. I mean Im not trying to be funny, but everyone has SOMETHING to bring the the board, whether it is a miracle line of their own or inspirational pictures or a horror story or just humor. I would put MONEY on that there are some people who have SL hair that is healthier than some of the oldies or chicks with hair to their heels. let people offer their voices/opinions and maybe even bring their ignorance/arrogance to light, but let them do it on their OWN! chill out. . . it's a hair board. don't like it, don't read it, don't respond to it. because the topics are INTEREST driven, when stupid/ignorant topics stay at the top of the page, it is YOUR OWN FAULT!!!!!!!! when u stop responding it is on page 198348 and NOT is going all the way back there to read/resurface a topic. I mean treat the ignorant topic the same way u would treat a NEWBIE'S TOPIC. . . and YES i said it. [insert gangster emoticon here] but seriously ladies, BE EASY!!!!! I'm just here to get a ponytail that doesn't look like a witch's broom. goodness ladies, go deep condition or order some essential oils or something. damn.

 

[Mrs.Green]

Ladies, again lets please keep this civil.

Irresistible, just like you deserve to be heard , others deserve to explain their actions also. IMO, some comments are boardline as far as being inflammatory, and I believe intended to start drama, but regardless if you keep taking the bait folx drop, you will be typing from now until the world ends. Just let it go. You arent the only one who can see through such petty attempts.

Lurkersinjan~ This statement is church right here~ I totally agree with Bre *sorry Fabulous you still Bre to me* Eat the meat and spit out the bones.

 

[LaPetiteCoquette]

im not even saying either "side" is correct because I totally understand everyone's reason for being "upset" or their opinions or whatever. . . but all of this "ole country" and "when I was coming up. . ." and "back in the day" stuff makes me as a mostly newbie not feel wanted. . . as oldies, ya'll DO realize that MOST of the people that were here with u when u joined, are gone right? like they reached their goal and/or found what worked for them or quit, and LEFT! so wishing it was only the old people on here will have like 7 people and 3 mods, and I guess u will just type to one another. I mean Im not trying to be funny, but everyone has SOMETHING to bring the the board, whether it is a miracle line of their own or inspirational pictures or a horror story or just humor. I would put MONEY on that there are some people who have SL hair that is healthier than some of the oldies or chicks with hair to their heels. let people offer their voices/opinions and maybe even bring their ignorance/arrogance to light, but let them do it on their OWN! chill out. . . it's a hair board. don't like it, don't read it, don't respond to it. because the topics are INTEREST driven, when stupid/ignorant topics stay at the top of the page, it is YOUR OWN FAULT!!!!!!!! when u stop responding it is on page 198348 and NOT is going all the way back there to read/resurface a topic. I mean treat the ignorant topic the same way u would treat a NEWBIE'S TOPIC. . . and YES i said it. [insert gangster emoticon here] but seriously ladies, BE EASY!!!!! I'm just here to get a ponytail that doesn't look like a witch's broom. goodness ladies, go deep condition or order some essential oils or something. damn.

Why don't you tell us how you really feel, belle?

 

[firecracker]

Why don't you tell us how you really feel, belle?

along with some spacing, paragraphs etc so my dumbazz can read the post.

 

[LaPetiteCoquette]

along with some spacing, paragraphs etc so my dumbazz can read the post.

LOL!!

 

[Riverwalk]

along with some spacing, paragraphs etc so my dumbazz can read the post.

 

[trinigul]

I LOVE this site - responsible for many of the times I feel good all over. Best darn $5 I've ever spent! I've gained sooo much from this joint that I can more than ignore shade and negativity. Look, this may not be IRL, but real people are still posting. Plus, cresting 40 is a beautiful thing. Ish just doesn't mean that much to me anymore.

I go and search for advice for ANYTHING and 99% of the time I end up right back here with with my twin folx.

Much love to all those who just want to love themselves: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbkZaFMpRss

 

[Blessed_Angel]

Lucia! girl I DONT KNOW what happened, but the whole tone is different! no respect whatsoever! personal attacks when speaking on a product, insults , character attacks, ambushes, Ive seen it all lately. I have never seen lhcf like this! its like its divided now into the 'in crowds' and now there are clicks , no sisterhood whatsoever! Those days seem to be gone! I have been shocked at what goes on here now! Really! and yeah I noticed when I came back around so many of the most beautiful positive ladies that had been here so long, arent around. I miss them and what lhcf used to be! yes this could change lhcf drastically! and many would not want to be here for whats been going on lately! who would?

I'm kinda new here, so I am learning from you guys how LHCF used to be. I see how it is now. And eventhough a lot of what goes on is really disgraceful, I don't let it deter me from the positive and good things that are actually on here.

And although I still don't get much help for my hair questions, I refuse to give up. Hopefully, things will turn around....if people remember what this site was created for.

 

[Kirei]

I am mad I just read this whole post! Ate my lunch and all while reading it!

But as a noob myself, I do see alot of the smart a$$ness that goes on. Look in this thread alone, how many smart behind smilies were posted? I think those who need to change have outed themselves i nthis thread with the smart comments and snide remarks that I don't feel like qouting.

But I agree if you don't agree or think someone is annoying or whatver, why post? Why roll your eyes and stamp your feet? Just move on!

Yes, I do get annoyed when people ask questions about topics that I just spent a nice 3 hours searching for and reading through and yet they can't even research it for themselves. I have only asked about 2 or 3 questions on this board, the rest I just search for or look in the archives.

Protective Styling- covered
Bunning- covered
Baggying- covered
co-wash-covered-
etc., why do people keep asking the same questions about these things? SEARCH IT OUT! Felt nice to say that! But notice I didn't attack anyone, I usually move past those threads.

 

[napgurl]

I think a good debate gleans more knowledge for all. Unfortunately some members are touchy and view debates as drama or as soon as someone disagrees with their opinions they get hurt feelings -- finding it hard to accept an opposing opinion gracefully.

How boring this board would be if we all had the same opinions and experiences. I believe we all want to be encouraging and to share our successes and setbacks, but we also want to get the pros and cons, the good bad and the ugly on products, methods etc. And thus we should not have to walk on egg-shells for a few touchy people.

Mods you are doing an excellent job letting most of these instances work themselves out.

 

[january noir]

I LOVE this site - responsible for many of the times I feel good all over. Best darn $5 I've ever spent! I've gained sooo much from this joint that I can more than ignore shade and negativity. Look, this may not be IRL, but real people are still posting. Plus, cresting 40 is a beautiful thing. Ish just doesn't mean that much to me anymore.

I go and search for advice for ANYTHING and 99% of the time I end up right back here with with my twin folx.

Much love to all those who just want to love themselves: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbkZaFMpRss

I LUB this post!

 

[Irresistible]

im not even saying either "side" is correct because I totally understand everyone's reason for being "upset" or their opinions or whatever. . . but all of this "ole country" and "when I was coming up. . ." and "back in the day" stuff makes me as a mostly newbie not feel wanted. . . as oldies, ya'll DO realize that MOST of the people that were here with u when u joined, are gone right? like they reached their goal and/or found what worked for them or quit, and LEFT! so wishing it was only the old people on here will have like 7 people and 3 mods, and I guess u will just type to one another. I mean Im not trying to be funny, but everyone has SOMETHING to bring the the board, whether it is a miracle line of their own or inspirational pictures or a horror story or just humor. I would put MONEY on that there are some people who have SL hair that is healthier than some of the oldies or chicks with hair to their heels. let people offer their voices/opinions and maybe even bring their ignorance/arrogance to light, but let them do it on their OWN! chill out. . . it's a hair board. don't like it, don't read it, don't respond to it. because the topics are INTEREST driven, when stupid/ignorant topics stay at the top of the page, it is YOUR OWN FAULT!!!!!!!! when u stop responding it is on page 198348 and NOT is going all the way back there to read/resurface a topic. I mean treat the ignorant topic the same way u would treat a NEWBIE'S TOPIC. . . and YES i said it. [insert gangster emoticon here] but seriously ladies, BE EASY!!!!! I'm just here to get a ponytail that doesn't look like a witch's broom. goodness ladies, go deep condition or order some essential oils or something. damn.

To be honest alot of us already reached our goals or were close years ago, alot of us were just pushing even further or even just maintaining, which is another challenge in itself . we also just hung out and fed off the positivity and it was ALWAYS about helping others and the connections. I dont think we are trying to insinuate that its a newbie/oldie issue, its just that the tone of lhcf has changed. Basically what we are saying is that we miss the positivity and the tone. And the truth is many of us back then and now will always help out new people or anybody for that matter. and also what we are saying is that its highly unlikely that they left when they reached their goals-you should have seen these ladies hair while they were here just chillin'-nah we are saying it happened probably because of the shift in the vibe here. We will never know but many of us that have been here can surely speak on it. With the experience to back it. The whole tone here is different than it used to be. I think we just miss that-and we connect it to the many positive beautiful ladies with beautiful spirits and hearts that used to be around then

 

[gymfreak336]

I think a good debate gleans more knowledge for all. Unfortunately some members are touchy and view debates as drama or as soon as someone disagrees with their opinions they get hurt feelings -- finding it hard to accept an opposing opinion gracefully.

How boring this board would be if we all had the same opinions and experiences. I believe we all want to be encouraging and to share our successes and setbacks, but we also want to get the pros and cons, the good bad and the ugly on products, methods etc. And thus we should not have to walk on egg-shells for a few touchy people.

Mods you are doing an excellent job letting most of these instances work themselves out.

Great post. Everyone deserves to be respected..not just the old heads not just people with "better" hair

 

[Irresistible]

Ya'll just noticed this two plus years after the fact?

aww girl you know I started just poppin in and out from time to time, this is the longest stretch I been around regularly in a while now. so its still kinda new to me and shocking

 

[Irresistible]

Great post. Everyone deserves to be respected..not just the old heads not just people with "better" hair

I certainly never asked for respect for those reasons! I asked for it because it just simply should be! I really hope this isnt what this is now going to turn into........lord

now its gone from ambushing to saying if one wants that not to happen to them, then it must be because of their hair and/or join date?


Thats a non issue, its about what should not be going down on lhcf period!

 

[oooop2]

I have definitely learned a lot from this site and choose to overlook the negativity and seek out that information that will be beneficial to me. At the end of the day, there are so many more BIGGER issues in the world than what my hair looks like and what products I am going to/not going to use on my hair. So although this hair thing is fun, for me, it really isn't THAT serious where I am going to let someones post affect me...