youtube girl hair abuse update

[Neith]

My goodness... you make a good case here.

I did not watch the video, and I had thought it was just rough combing, similar to what we have seen in movies. I thought it was excessive to take the child away.

But upon learning more of the abuse that took place in the video I feel relieved that the children are, at least temporarily, safer.

I think most foster parents are closer to indifferent than to abusive. After all, this is a child they just met, not a child born to them. But indifference trumps familiar violence any day.

Thank you!

The video makes me LIVID... but I also find it disturbing that anyone could look at it and feel that it's ok.

I really mean it... if I saw someone brushing a DOG like that I would call someone. It's not right.

 

[loolalooh]

Nope, different video.



No, the woman put the girl on the floor and got on top of her. Literally. While she was on top of her, she ripped through her hair with a brush (in all different directions, not even properly detangling)

She also got another child to restrain the girl on the floor. All while the girl was screaming and crying so hard she got RED in the face (which they laughed at)

Maybe you just don't remember those parts, but they were pretty brutal.

Physically painful, but emotionally/mentally painful on top of it. To scream at a small child about how she doesn't "have no fu***# daddy". To have other people in the room taunting, making fun of and hitting the girl.

I'm not overrareacting. I've had MANY a rough combout with little plastic combs. I've gotten pops in my head too.

but that behavior in the vid was no where near being normal. The cursing, screaming, pulling by the hair, teasing, hitting, rolling around on the floor like animals... I mean seriously... how in the hell is anyone able to defend that?

I remember the video very well. Yes, the woman tried to restrain a girl based on what I observed; I don't think she literally sat on the girl. Regardless, though, where is our disagreement? I agree that she did not act normally. I agree that she needs help. I do not defend her behavior. I want for her to learn better hair care techniques, take anger management, and ideally -- if all works well -- for the home to be mended (assuming no deeper abuse was found by CPS).

 

[msa]

I dont want to say much, but I will say that this situation was taking to far... Yes it apears that the child was in alot of pain but having a daughter and having done a lot of little girls hair, alot of time kids can over-react! getting a spaking hurts! you run around screaming and crying trying to get away.. but not always is it abuse..

I dont feel her children should be taken away from her but that she gets HELP!!!

However, I was not there and did not feel the pain that this little girl may have been going through....

This was not just bad hair combing techniques. The child was not overreacting. And she was not getting a spanking.

I truly don't understand how it is not obvious to some people that this child was being abused. Is this what we've come to accept as the norm in our community?

This just makes me sad. My mother abused me for years before I was put into to foster care and now I understand why it went on so long. Obviously, folks didn't even think it was a problem.

 

[SmartyPants]

Nope, different video.



No, the woman put the girl on the floor and got on top of her. Literally. While she was on top of her, she ripped through her hair with a brush (in all different directions, not even properly detangling)

She also got another child to restrain the girl on the floor. All while the girl was screaming and crying so hard she got RED in the face (which they laughed at)

Maybe you just don't remember those parts, but they were pretty brutal.

Physically painful, but emotionally/mentally painful on top of it. To scream at a small child about how she doesn't "have no fu***# daddy". To have other people in the room taunting, making fun of and hitting the girl.

I'm not overrareacting. I've had MANY a rough combout with little plastic combs. I've gotten pops in my head too.

but that behavior in the vid was no where near being normal. The cursing, screaming, pulling by the hair, teasing, hitting, rolling around on the floor like animals... I mean seriously... how in the hell is anyone able to defend that?

Out of fairness to some of the posters, this was a two-part video, remember?! The first part was definitely worse than the second so perhaps they only saw the second part.

In any case, if a man were to inflict half the abuse that child suffered onto his wife, all of the folks in here trying to say it wasn't so bad would be calling the woman stupid if she didn't leave him. So, why is slapping, hitting, and verbal degradation acceptable for a child who is no position to defend herself?

 

[loolalooh]

Out of fairness to some of the posters, this was a two-part video, remember?! The first part was definitely worse than the second so perhaps they only saw the second part.

In any case, if a man were to inflict half the abuse that child suffered onto his wife, all of the folks in here trying to say it wasn't so bad would be calling the woman stupid if she didn't leave him. So, why is slapping, hitting, and verbal degradation acceptable for a child who is no position to defend herself?

Now this is something I did not know; thanks for the heads up. In the video I saw, there was no hitting, no name calling, and no sitting on the girl. I don't know if the video I saw had the two parts combined or if there was a second part. Was this girl seriously hit, slapped, called names? I saw rough brushing, restraining, a mother cursing, and the brother laughing (not that all of that is any better).

 

[Neith]

I remember the video very well. Yes, the woman tried to restrain a girl based on what I observed; I don't think she literally sat on the girl. Regardless, though, where is our disagreement? I agree that she did not act normally. I agree that she needs help. I do not defend her behavior. I want for her to learn better hair care techniques, take anger management, and ideally -- if all works well -- for the home to be mended (assuming no deeper abuse was found by CPS).

I saw the mother hit the child (very beginning of the video) and get on top of the child. The other child also hit her and got on top of her. I'm not going to repost the vid though... I don't want to see it again.

Mostly I think it's beyond bad parenting.

Everyone makes bad decisions... but you don't have to be the best parent to know you don't pull your child by their hair and scream and curse at them like you're crazy.

That's not something you just do by mistake. It wasn't her intent to actually detangle and take care of the child's hair. I doubt she combs her own hair like that. She wanted to bully and harm the child. That's obvious to me...

Anger management? Forgive me, but I don't see someone who does something like this as having simple anger issues. I see them as sadists. They enjoy inflicting pain on other people. The mom was actually smiling in the vid.

 

[loolalooh]

I saw the mother hit the child (very beginning of the video) and get on top of the child. The other child also hit her and got on top of her. I'm not going to repost the vid though... I don't want to see it again.

Mostly I think it's beyond bad parenting.

Everyone makes bad decisions... but you don't have to be the best parent to know you don't pull your child by their hair and scream and curse at them like you're crazy.

That's not something you just do by mistake. It wasn't her intent to actually detangle and take care of the child's hair. I doubt she combs her own hair like that. She wanted to bully and harm the child. That's obvious to me...

Anger management? Forgive me, but I don't see someone who does something like this as having simple anger issues. I see them as sadists. They enjoy inflicting pain on other people. The mom was actually smiling in the vid.

There we go. Now, I see what you mean. I must've seen only part 2 of the video. I didn't see any of the hitting ... and who knows what else I missed in part 1. I definitely don't condone hitting a child. Yes, hitting is beyond anger issues.

 

[DDTexlaxed]

CPS must have found other damaging evidence against the woman to remove the children from her custody. I'm so happy the children are removed from her custody. I hope they get the mental help and counseling they will need. Why folks post these kind of things on You Tube and think it's a joke, I'll never know.

 

[isabella09]

Honestly this video was absolutely disgusting on every single level. The lady (and I use this term very loosely) showed such vindictiveness and hate whilst combing that poor child’s hair to the extent of highlighting an underlining problem in that household. Clearly after the CPS investigation they deemed it necessary with all the evidence they collated to remove the children. For anyone who believes this is remotely acceptable behaviour I invite you to watch the video in its entirety and imagine if that were you in the position of that poor child. If this mother is willing to showcase this kind of treatment to the world, my heart saddens as to what happened behind close doors.

 

[Neith]

Now this is something I did not know; thanks for the heads up. In the video I saw, there was no hitting, no name calling, and no sitting on the girl. I don't know if the video I saw had the two parts combined or if there was a second part. Was this girl seriously hit, slapped, called names? I saw rough brushing, restraining, a mother cursing, and the brother laughing (not that all of that is any better).

The mom swatted her behind with the brush I believe. And the other little one did smack at her a few times.

I wouldn't care so much if that's all that happened...

If it was just a girl getting fussy about having her hair combed and she got a few swats on the backside... ok, then. I wouldn't do it, but that isn't abuse imo.

but this girl had to endure all this other stuff, and you hit her and encourage the other child to hit her too?

Everything together was so physically and emotionally draining for the child

There were 3 parts I think.

 

[TeeWhyAre]

this mother needs:
1) Court mandated parenting classes
2) A course in natural hair care (why we LHCF ladies should set this off in our local communities)

I have very mixed feelings about the outcome. I pray she does the world to be reunited with her children. And she can see the seriousness of her action.

 

[loolalooh]

The mom swatted her behind with the brush I believe. And the other little one did smack at her a few times.

I wouldn't care so much if that's all that happened...

If it was just a girl getting fussy about having her hair combed and she got a few swats on the backside... ok, then. I wouldn't do it, but that isn't abuse imo.

but this girl had to endure all this other stuff, and you hit her and encourage the other child to hit her too?

There were 3 parts I think.

Wow, that's crazy! It disturbs me just to hear that she was hit with a brush and that her brother smacked at her on top of all the other stuff. Now I see what all the talk is about. I definitely missed a part or 2.

 

[discodumpling]

Thx for this informative post silvergirl. My prayers are with the children AND with the mother...I hope she has realized the error of her ways.

 

[AfroKink]

What is going on in this thread? A video was created. Concerned citizens reported it. Trained professionals analyzed and investigated. From past experience in these matters they saw reason to remove the children (if only temporarily). While some of us might be conflicted, CPS who has more knowledge and experience at spotting child abuse, neglect, and endangerment than most of us have, was not conflicted.

 

[song_of_serenity]

You guys, come on. You KNOW it had to be more than that youtube video...

If that child being treated that way could be video taped and put up for show for jokes? And the mum treated her that way, sat on her, tore her hair out (did you see that baby's edges?) and CURSED her out like a grown woman AND struck her with the brush ON camera during a hair combing (she had it done perfectly up and then let it down just to torture her some more) imagine what went on when the camera stopped rolling? That mum had some serious ANGER in her.

Wonder what the big sister who put it up on youtube is thinking!

 

[SmartyPants]

What is going on in this thread? A video was created. Concerned citizens reported it. Trained professionals analyzed and investigated. From past experience in these matters they saw reason to remove the children (if only temporarily). While some of us might be conflicted, CPS who has more knowledge and experience at spotting child abuse, neglect, and endangerment than most of us have, were not conflicted.

I'll tell you what's going on...

There is an [old] school of thought that says it's acceptable for [especially black] people to beat kids to get them to mind. That viewpoint is very prevalent on this board.

 

[LynnieB]

Any one and I do mean ANYONE who does not think what this mother did was torture than may I suggest that you find a comb and a brush and begin pulling out your own hair, from your own scalp with that comb or brush.

DO IT. Do it now! See how it feels to be tortured and powerless to do anything about it by scream and cry.

You may not hold your own hair so it doesn't hurt.
You may not use conditioner or wet the hair.
You may not take small sections of hair to work on.
You may not comb or brush gently.

You WILL leave your hair dry and tangled and use that damn brush.
You WILL use long, brutally forceful, ripping motions from root to tip.
You WILL also take the comb and brush and back tease the hair to make it even more matted at the roots and after ALL of that, you will proceed to rip and tear the matts right out of your scalp.

You will do this for 5-10 minutes NONSTOP.

When you are finished, your head MUST look like this little girls scalp (hopefully it'll feel like it's on fire). And, while looking in the mirror you don't notice any bald patches, then DO IT AGAIN and AGAIN UNTIL YOU DO.

Better yet, have an enemy of yours do it to you and you will feel just a tiny bit of what this little girl must have felt, her pain and agony will be your pain and agony. I'm reasonably sure that any of you would pray to God that some kind soul would intervene on your behalf.

I sincerely hope that this child and her brother can feel what it's like to live in a home of true love. I hope and pray that their souls can begin to heal.

I hope the mother receives whatever treatments she needs and if or when she ever gets these children back, she will know how to properly care for AND treat them with love.

 

[DivaD04]

I am simply so very happy to know and be able to report, that these 2 children have been rescued for the time being. Who knows… I may actually being talking about two kids that I will adopt one day very soon.
-YoY

not to say she's going out to try to adopt one or both kids...she has like many of us, the interest and safe welfare of these kids at heart. i think when we put folks like that foul mama on blast, it sends positive signals out to people. who knows, someone may actually be touched by this story and would want to help. not everyone view....we have to many kids in the system as it is....i'm sure they'll find a lovely home for them. we just have to be more optimistic.
i hope..............be nice D.........i hope the mother will get prosecuted.

 

[BlackMasterPiece]

Nope, different video.



No, the woman put the girl on the floor and got on top of her. Literally. While she was on top of her, she ripped through her hair with a brush (in all different directions, not even properly detangling)

She also got another child to restrain the girl on the floor. All while the girl was screaming and crying so hard she got RED in the face (which they laughed at)

Maybe you just don't remember those parts, but they were pretty brutal.

Physically painful, but emotionally/mentally painful on top of it. To scream at a small child about how she doesn't "have no fu***# daddy". To have other people in the room taunting, making fun of and hitting the girl.

I'm not overrareacting. I've had MANY a rough combout with little plastic combs. I've gotten pops in my head too.

but that behavior in the vid was no where near being normal. The cursing, screaming, pulling by the hair, teasing, hitting, rolling around on the floor like animals... I mean seriously... how in the hell is anyone able to defend that?

WOW. Okay, I think a HUGE chunk of the people that said they were conflicted are mistaken thinking of the video I thought it was were the girl was crying while getting her hair hot combed, the one posted by kami in her thread is the most recent so people probably automatically think that's the oneerplexed

 

[sleepflower]

You guys, come on. You KNOW it had to be more than that youtube video...

If that child being treated that way could be video taped and put up for show for jokes? And the mum treated her that way, sat on her, tore her hair out (did you see that baby's edges?) and CURSED her out like a grown woman AND struck her with the brush ON camera during a hair combing (she had it done perfectly up and then let it down just to torture her some more) imagine what went on when the camera stopped rolling? That mum had some serious ANGER in her.

Wonder what the big sister who put it up on youtube is thinking!

Probably that people calling this child abuse are overreacting. As someone else said...this sort of thing can be so everyday in some households. I myself was an adult before I finally 'got it' that treating children this way is abuse.

 

[TeeWhyAre]

I just pains me to see people treat children bad. I'm deeply sensitive and I feel things very deeply. I am so sad for these babies.

I even feel sad for their ghetto-*** ignorant mother for her foolishness. We don't know if this was her childhood experience and if she doesn't know any better. I don't know. I just feel sad for all involved and hope the mother learns a lesson. Where the hell is the father in all of this?

Sorry!

/rant

 

[Fine 4s]

I never saw this link, is it still up? Prolly not...but if it is, can someone post the link again?

 

[AfroKink]

I never saw this link, is it still up? Prolly not...but if it is, can someone post the link again?

I think its posted on the page before this one

 

[delray712000]

I would just like to say that I think it is wonderful to know that someone in this big world cares about the welfare of the children. However, the mothers lack of kinky hair care knowledge is representative of others who lack the same knowledge. How do we know that the children were placed in a home where nurturing hair care is practiced. Not all people are aware of the hair practices learned and shared hear on LHCF. So who's to say that the children did not go into another home much like the one they left.

I am quite sure that she thought she was really doing that girls hair right. She represents people who don't believe black hair can't get wet and it won't grow unless you are mixed, which we all know that that is not true. What is the answer? To educate people about kinky hair care. She should have been educated as well because it is obvious she does not know any better.

 

[Yellowflowers]

This was not just bad hair combing techniques. The child was not overreacting. And she was not getting a spanking.

I truly don't understand how it is not obvious to some people that this child was being abused. Is this what we've come to accept as the norm in our community?

This just makes me sad. My mother abused me for years before I was put into to foster care and now I understand why it went on so long. Obviously, folks didn't even think it was a problem.

There are a lot of products for the texture of that childs hair. The mother is just too ignorant to find out about them.

If feel soo sorry for abused children and the fact that people will know about it but won't take steps to protect them.

Some folks are so sadistic and mentally unstable that they cannot recognize abuse when they witness it. It is just familiar territory.

No wonder society suffers. This makes me sad too. Very sad.

 

[CurlyMoo]

The police can't just come into your house and snatch your kids away. There has to be an investigation. Not only that someone has to make charges or file a report against the mother. Then there has to be a determination that the child was actually abused and has suffered repeated abuse. This story is not over. CPS is well know to have children go missing, and suffer all types of abuse. My fear is that these children will get lost in the system. Hopefully there are other family members that will take the kids in. And if mom gets counselling she and the children can be a family again. I don't know how I feel about the children being taken out of the home unless they found repeated abuse. I certainly don't want children in abuse homes. Mom needs a lesson in haircare for sure and giving TLC.

 

[Fine 4s]

I think its posted on the page before this one

You mean from the Lynnie B post?
I think those are just screen shots...anyone got a link?

 

[finickyone]

Thanks for the update & bless you for being so proactive!

As a mother, even if my child was over reacting with the crying & screaming, I would not & could not stand to hear her in distress. There was not one gentle word said to that little girl. There was not one hug, NOTHING! My daughter is 8 & when she get upset, yes, the tears maybe exaggerated, but I'm there to provide some words of consolation & a hug. That mother displayed no kindness, no love, & at times it almost seemed as if she was enjoying what was going on. The vulgar language in itself was enough to make my ears bleed. How can you talk to a child that way? I work for Dept of Health & Human Services & trust me, there has been way too many cases where the children were not removed & the ending result is bad. When you review the file you wonder, incident 1, incident 2, incident 3.... why in the world wasn't the child removed before this occurred. As someone else mentioned, keeping the family together is priority. Let's just hope that with parenting classes & counseling, this mother will make the necessary changes to get her kids back.

 

[Tarae]

I have mixed emotions about this whole thing.

So do I. The hair combing wasn't even the worse part about that video, though. I really wish those kids the best. Living with an abusive mother then being taken away and put into a new home is not easy for anyone.

What a sad situation either way.

 

[RedVelvet310]

So I guess we will be charging and taking away every mother of 5yo chipped headed relaxed kids too? erplexed Putting all those chemicals in their heads, I would assume it'd burn. I think this may have been taken TOTALLY out of proportion. Childrens Aid and Foster care is intended (IMO) for EXTREME cases (i.e. the childs life/well being is endangered), bad hair combing is trivial.. Yes unfortunate, but to take the kids out of their home and into foster care?! Ugh, that's horrible (this is coming from someone who knows plenty of people in a "GOOD" foster care system, and the stories are heartbreak)... Foster care is no joke, it is in my opinion more severe than bad hair combing. I understand that viewers want to punish the mother, but come on, you want to punish the child as well???