BLACK/HISPANIC MEN AND NATURAL HAIR

[ccd]

OT.... Is any one else tickled by the Ad that appears on the upper right of the screen ( HD Hair pieces)

I mean REALLY Google ADs???? A bald headed White man and A Bald Headed Black Women WOW..... We have come a LONNNNNNGG Way Boy


http://www.hairdirect.com/photos/before-after/deborah.aspx

 

[bludaydreamr]

A few people have hit on my same observation. The quantity is less the quality is better. I agree with everyone who says region and confidence has everything to do with the reception the you may get. I carry myself with confidence and pride, no matter if I'm dressed for work or running to the corner store with my head tied up.

My SO is biracial, when I told him I was going to cut all my hair off and wear a small fro his response was to just keep it neat. Now that he has seen the results of my efforts he makes it a point to tell me not to damage it with heat.

 

[PinkSkates]

Black men have been conditioned to hate themselves just as much as black women.

There are a lot of Black women who don't like natural hair either.

I agree! Most black women want no parts of their real, naturally kinky, nappy hair. And its hard for men period to love our natural hair when we constantly hide its true texture. Or tuck our natural hair underneath fake, straight-hair weaves, wigs and braids.

I thinkit's more so length, rather than relaxed vs. natural.

I have heard Black men rave over women with "lion-like" hair that is just big, fluffy and long. Kinda like Beyoce's darker skinned dancer (she's my hair idol)

I think the resistance that a lot of us get is due to having SHORT hair, not nappy hair.

Prime example is Mwezdi. She has 4b hair but it is long and big. What man wouldn't be attracted to that?

Yep I agree. I get so much positive attention from all races of men when I wear my hair as you see it in my siggy. They are captivated by not only my natural texture, but by the fact that is kinky but still has length to it. From my personal experience length also plays an important factor.

 

[jada1111]

I have 100% 4a cottony hair that I wear out 99% of the time and in a puff the other 1% and have NEVER had a problem pulling black and latino men since I bc'd 6 years ago. In fact, I believe I'm getting hit on MORE because of it.

This isn't to negate what others are experiencing. It could be a regional thing - I'm in Los Angeles and migrated from NYC where naturals were already flourishing.

 

[LightEyedMami]

I get lots of compliments on my hair from black men. Admittedly, most are 35+ (I'm 30+ myself, though). I think it's because they are from a time when they can remember lots of black women wearing their hair natural (afros). I think if we wore our hair natural more and learned and did all the styles for it, men would also become accustomed to it. A lot has to do with style, health, and length, because I've definitely gotten more positive responses since joining this forum.

I'm 4b, btw.

Me too Mwedzi i ALWAYS get compliments on my Natural hair from men that INCLUDES black men. I really don't see the hate that some of the others on the board have seen. BUT i wont say it has been ALL peaches and cream i still get that occasional crazy look, as if to say "She know she need to put a relaxer in them naps" erplexed

-Im also 4B

 

[LilBrownied]

I get lots of compliments on my hair from black men. Admittedly, most are 35+ (I'm 30+ myself, though). I think it's because they are from a time when they can remember lots of black women wearing their hair natural (afros). I think if we wore our hair natural more and learned and did all the styles for it, men would also become accustomed to it. A lot has to do with style, health, and length, because I've definitely gotten more positive responses since joining this forum.

I'm 4b, btw.

The only men on the street who complimented my hair when I was natural were older men. The fact that they might have gotten accustomed to it in that era makes a lot of sense. I started getting looks/calls from younger men when I put my hair in longer braids, not in a fro. The responses changed in a second.

 

[phynestone]

When I wore my hair natural, no one ever tried to talk to me. I tried to look as feminine as possible, but no, not a single look. If anything, people gave me a harder time because of it. When I did get compliments, it was usually from non-black men and black females who were friends.

 

[Keedah]

It's time that black women stop caring what black/hispanic men think about their hair. If you love your natural hair, wear it proud. Men love a woman who is confident. It's their loss, OP. Do you. If hair is the thing that keeps a man away, then he isn't worth it anyways.

Thats exactly how I feel. If you love everything else about me but are so shallow that you cant talk to me because of my hair then just keep it stepping.

 

[tocktick]

This situation is actually really quite unfortunate. However, I believe it is more reflective on these men's "preferences" (and arguably beauty standards within black communities) as opposed to whether one's type 4 (or tightly textured type 3c) hair is pretty or not. Imo, you can be confident as heck and rocking a great hairstyle but some men's minds will still scream: "Nappy. Stay away!". I believe the lack of attention some people experience is often down to length but this isn't always the case.

Personally, if some black men are not checking for me simply because of my God-given type 4 hair then I'm glad it has filtered them out. When I meet someone, they know what my hair texture is and that's the way I like it. I would never want to go through that "hair battle" some transitioning/natural women have with their husbands. That's just very sad to me.

 

[DayStar]

i dont think its a "black"man issue, i do think its an african american male issue. When my hair was locked up and APL, i wasnt seen here (america), but once i relaxed and i had BSL thick flowing hair i was seen. I think most AA men prefer straight hair on women and I think most AA women prefer straight hair on themselves. I do not think its a black male issue, more so cultural. When I was natural and in Toronto i never had an issue getting a black mans attention

 

[ceebee3]

i dont think its a "black"man issue, i do think its an african american male issue. When my hair was locked up and APL, i wasnt seen here (america), but once i relaxed and i had BSL thick flowing hair i was seen. I think most AA men prefer straight hair on women and I think most AA women prefer straight hair on themselves. I do not think its a black male issue, more so cultural. When I was natural and in Toronto i never had an issue getting a black mans attention

It is definetly and African American thing.

 

[Ramya]

Ramya....I'm just curious; totally not trying to be smart .... ..Don't hate me....I'm just asking; why did you feel the need to ETA....







IDK if their opinions or compliments hold more merit than a black man's .....They are conditioned to have "other ideas" based on natural hair and black women....so

But I agree that they definitely make a point of complimenting natural/natural looking textures.....I find it creepy and suspect though ....


I mean, I believe you can find 10 Bl & H men who hate it and 10 that love it..... If going natural is your decision and you think it's best for you.....definitely do you and be happy...... If you wear clothes, hair, makeup based on the likes and dislikes of a man.......................Girl You'll be stuck in the house not know what to do with yourself....... Wear your hair as YOU like it and strut down the street like .....I KNOW I look good....best be sure a WHOLE Lotta people will stop and stare....


I've seen some Beautiful 4 A..B....Z whatever women walking down the street......She holds her head up High and doesn't even look to see if anyone see's her! She is Seen and She was There....... Her presence is felt regardless......


I admire that...... I may not be the one to do it.....But I do admire and respect "her".....

Just because I wanted to be clear that he was just being a jerk. the girl he was talking about is a friend of ours and we have already argued him to death about our hair. he gave mine a 'pass' because it looks "done" while he continued to make rude jokes about her hair and then felt the NEED to write a note about it.

 

[vkb247]

I agree with the ladies who mentioned that this is a really big issue in America. Men here love natural hair but then again there is natural hair everywhere here and no one even thinks twice about a natural head unless it is untidy which doesn't really happen. But this is a hot and humid climate so curls are easier to deal with here than straight hair. I haven't worn my hair straight in over 10 years and I have traveled to many different places and never had a problem attracting men.

I understand that people can only speak about what they know about but there are black and hispanic men everywhere. Black Bermudian men dislike weaves and extensions so would prefer a woman who wears her own hair natural or relaxed.

 

[that_1_grrrl]

I haven't noticed a difference. I get hit on by Black and Latin men a lot. Most of the Latin men that hit on me are non-Black Latinos (i.e. mestizo Mexicans). I haven't received any negative feedback on my natural hair. *shrug*

It may be different where you live though. I don't think there is a right or wrong answer about this, and I think there are a lot of variables such as location, age, confidence level, etc.

 

[glamazon386]

Most men are conditioned to like long straight hair. Just like we are. I think the more they see natural hair the more accepting they will become over time.

But I will say this - With my natural hair I get just as many looks, comments, compliments as I did when I was relaxed or when I'm wearing straight hair. But I honestly believe natural hair looks better with my features so maybe it makes me seem more attractive in their eyes? Who knows... I've not really had any negative reactions to it. I'm sure there are some people out there who don't like my natural hair but they sure didn't make it known.

 

[Stella B.]

In my experience, I have noticed that men like women with hair that flows. I don't think it matters if its relaxed or natural, if it has enough length to flow, then they seem to be attracted by it. Years ago, when I wore my shoulder length hair in a 5 inch fro that was thick enough (not necessarily long)for the wind to blow thru, or had movement when I walked, the men loved it!

 

[Celestial]

It seems that since I went natural I don't get the looks like I use to when I was relaxed. It sems to me and I could be wrong but black men especially just don't like the natural 4b hair. I usually wear twist outs when I wear it out.

Black men love natural kinky hair. I get more attention now from men of all races than I did when I was relaxed. Every man stare now: black men, white men, hispanice, Arabs, Asian, Indian, and the in between. I also get hit on more.

 

[Sha76]

My DH (who's AA) loved my hair when I was straight, straight and short, when I BCed, when I'm fro'ed out...yada yada yada. I asked him what he prefers, he just simply stated..."clean hair". So..I keep it clean!

my DH thinks the same thing

 

[inspiration150]

I think some black man might have a prob. But I would get looks from other men. I think natural hair for some men is great because then they think most likely its not a weave. lol

 

[LoveisYou]

I got a lot of looks as a natural, especially from the "artsy" brothers

 

[snillohsss]

ok I experimented a little.

I have mostly 3c curls, and I have always gotten looks from from men. I have recently started to wear my hair straight. The looks, stares, and men tripping over themselve (white, black, hispanic, old, young) is not in the same ball park. I am convinced men just love straight hair that blows in the wind.

I went to the grocery store looking tore up (clothes wise), but my hair was straight and blowing every time I moved. Men were breaking their neck looking.

When my hair is curly, it is shorter. It is a bit over shoulder length. When my hair is straight, it is APL length.

I am convinced men eyes gravitated towards women of color whose REAL hair is straight, bouncy with length. That doesn't mean that they aren't attracted to those who don't fit that description, but I get way more attention with my hair straight rather than curly.

 

[lesedi]

The type of man that I attract has changed since going natural. I still get hit on but there's a change in quality.

Last night I spoke candidly with a group of men and women about it and the consensus was they didn't mind natural hair so long as they didn't know it was natural. Meaning pressed naturals and loose waves and curls

Now that just makes me MAD! Why are we (as a race) so ashamed of what comes out of our heads?

 

[TRINITY05]

It is the reactions we get from men that makes us so ashamed.

 

[Miss AJ]

I don't even care anymore. Any man who won't date a woman because her hair isn't the exact replica of Beyonce's long weave...is gay.

 

[gissellr78]

My DH (colombian) says i would look hot with a fro...everytime we see a natural he reminds me....but i know his family would FREAK! not that i give a damn lol

I think men love long hair...straight, natural afro, or curly

 

[BostonMaria]

My DH (colombian) says i would look hot with a fro...everytime we see a natural he reminds me....but i know his family would FREAK! not that i give a damn lol

I think men love long hair...straight, natural afro, or curly

Gissellr, do you think you'd ever go natural? I'm not judging, just asking. Your hair is gorgeous BTW

As far as myself... I can't speak for all women but when I wear my hair out curly I get attention from all types of men - African American, latino, white, Indian... FOR ME I think that once my hair grew out and I became more confident I got more attention. I live in the North East so that might be why too. Natural hair is not out of the ordinary around these parts. You see many women rocking their beautiful natural hair. My DH loves my hair curly or straight. He knows better than to complain LOL

 

[gissellr78]

Gissellr, do you think you'd ever go natural? I'm not judging, just asking. Your hair is gorgeous BTW

As far as myself... I can't speak for all women but when I wear my hair out curly I get attention from all types of men - African American, latino, white, Indian... FOR ME I think that once my hair grew out and I became more confident I got more attention. I live in the North East so that might be why too. Natural hair is not out of the ordinary around these parts. You see many women rocking their beautiful natural hair. My DH loves my hair curly or straight. He knows better than to complain LOL

I don't know if i will...everytime is time for me to relax i think about it...right now i can't get my hands out of my new growth i love it lol...maybe i can take it week by week...

If i knew how i would look it would probably be easier but i don't i have been relaxed since 15 and i don't remember.

 

[BostonMaria]

I don't know if i will...everytime is time for me to relax i think about it...right now i can't get my hands out of my new growth i love it lol...maybe i can take it week by week...

If i knew how i would look it would probably be easier but i don't i have been relaxed since 15 and i don't remember.

Well take your time making that decision. The good news is that if you ever decide to take the plunge you have the information right here on this page. You can always reach out to us too for help. Its a tough decision, especially if your hair is long and healthy like yours.

 

[Geminigirl]

IDC shoot black men are getting on my nerves these days anyways. Especially the clowns out here. LOL. I still get MAD attention with my type 4 hair though. Even here in the south.

But you don't get noticed in MD? natural hair is plentiful out there especially in BMORE. BMORE Stand up. Also in the DC area. Dreads and natural hair is something I would see frequently.

 

[gissellr78]

Well take your time making that decision. The good news is that if you ever decide to take the plunge you have the information right here on this page. You can always reach out to us too for help. Its a tough decision, especially if your hair is long and healthy like yours.

I will take it week by week...Yes i do like my hair long so is hard but i do love the natural look also..when i see women with my hair type (4a) natural looking fierce i crave it...but i have to admit i have no clue how to keep it and the uncertainty scares me...

but week by week i will go.