Honestly, Do you Think Some People Will Never...

[lala]

My response is...I think we can all reach out hair goals. But…you need to be consistent and use a regimen that works for your hair. Not every regimen will work for everybody.

If you look at my regimen, it doesn’t change...it's quite simple in fact. I may experiment with a new oil or serum, but I don’t change anything else. I hear about many new products that sound very interesting and tempting, but I don’t give in. If you’re seeing good results, don’t think that adding more products is going to get you to your goal faster. Again, be consistent.

I’m sorry if some of you have become discouraged, but I think in all honesty you’re not getting to the culprit of your hair woes. If your hair is breaking or if your ends are constantly splitting, do a process of elimination. One by one, eliminate the product that is not compatible with your hair. Some products have chemicals in them that your scalp or hair may not agree with. You should keep a journal and document what you apply to your hair daily and note the state of your hair. I’ve had to say good bye to many hair care products that have caused my hair to shed, split or become frizzy.

All hair grows, however; the key is to keep what you already have. You have to not only concentrate on the new growth, but you’ve got to figure out how you can keep the ends and the middle section of your hair on your head.

I have to go out on a limb and say that I don't see anything wrong with this thread b/c this thread is stimulating thought. We've got a problem, so how are we going to solve it...what's the solution? I've been able to achieve my goals b/c I do what works for my hair and I stick with it. Just my thoughts...

 

[meia]

seee now i'm not sure how to answer this....

if we use me for example, with relaxed hair, my hair grew to just above waist.. honestly it took me about 13 years of my life part of that i was natural and the latter part of that i was relaxed. i made it though....

at this point i'm all natural and i'm attempting waist even still because i have done it before but then part of me wonders if having had a relaxer changed something about that all...i think it might have made my hair look longer because the cuticles were being stretched to the breaking point...

why do i say all this? i think its possible to grow to any length in my opinion, but a lot of factors play a role into whether that length is attainable such as care and regimen, processes, stress, environmental factors that play a role in it all...

so YES i think its possible to grow hair to extreme lengths.....but i also think if this person isn't really taking the time, making a commitment, and cutting out the bad products/processes out of it all, whatever growth they may have might just break off and make it seem like they'll never get there...

 

[Crackers Phinn]

erruh......

What's really real in this thread?

I just went back and read the first couple of pages where the majority of posters (including ME) say YEAH YOU CAN MAKE IT TO YOUR GOAL.

Yet there are all these discouraged folks.

Is this beef or are people reading something that I'm missing?

And hurry up before this thread gets the clank clank.

 

[MizaniMami]

erruh......

What's really real in this thread?

I just went back and read the first couple of pages where the majority of posters (including ME) say YEAH YOU CAN MAKE IT TO YOUR GOAL.

Yet there are all these discouraged folks.

Is this beef or are people reading something that I'm missing?

And hurry up before this thread gets the clank clank.

No beef. Just paying were saying that I shouldn't have made the thread since it seems catty and that it discouraged some people. You shoudl read the whole thread though. It's a good read, lots of interesteing views.

 

[Shea]

Mizani atleast this thread is not boring. Lol. But your post are informing. Some people may not be getting there as fast as others, thats all. No need to feel discourage ladies. For one second I did only bc I thought everyone was at the same growing pace. I realize that this hair race is not for the swift but those that endure. Maintenance is key bc it could be hair today gone tomorrow. Having something is a blessing be humble and take care of what you have bc some people in unfortunate circumstances or cancer survivors are trying to get their hair back. So what its not BSL yet or even APL but it will be. It probably wont be there next year but it will be one day. Claim it in the name of the Lord.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

No beef. Just paying were saying that I shouldn't have made the thread since it seems catty and that it discouraged some people. You shoudl read the whole thread though. It's a good read, lots of interesteing views.

Oh I read the whole thing that's what made me go back and re-read the first couple of pages to figure out what was being talked about in the last pages.

 

[Jas123]

think everyone can reach their goals with commitment, patience and the right regimen. I do agree that genetics do play a role. But I feel the gentics deals more with the pace rather than the "can they". Some ppl will make it faster based on gentics and other conditions. But I believe it's possible for all.

ITA with everything you said...and I really hope no one is discourage by this thread...and if you feel like your hair is growing really, really slow maybe you should re-examine your regimen (maybe you need to wash more or less..more protein or less..are you taking your vits..start exercising..etc..), be honest with yourself (as in are you really doing what you're suppose on a consistent bases)..I'm a firm believer in acheiving whatever goal you set out for..it may take time but it can happen...
I believe in miracles!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Jas123]

Great post!! This brings to mind old oooooollllllddddddd picures of great grandmothers with long past waist length braided hair. In one or two braids. I think with wanting to get hair straight is when we started messing up. Most girls I knew with long hair growing up attributed it to grease and water.

water to moisturize & grease to seal

 

[Enchantmt]

I honestly don't think this poster was starting this thread with that in mind, but I completely understand how you could feel this way. And frankly, I really do hope that others and the moderators on this forum think carefully about allowing these sorts of threads to exist. Yes, everyone has a right to free speech, but these types of threads, no matter how innocent they start out, almost always degenerate into namecalling or hurt feelings.

It's not for me or anyone else to say whose hair can do what. I'm focused on my journey and maxing out my potential. I will always support my sistas, though. If someone on the forum who was spear bald and had been since childhood came on and said she wanted to get to waist length as her ultimate goal, I'm cheering her on. Wagging my finger and saying, "Uh-uh, not for you babe" helps no one, including myself.

There have been times that I've gotten the feeling that longer-haired members have been doing the verbal equivalent of patting people on the head who have shorter hair and lofty goals. I've learned to just skip over those particular posts and ignore those posters, but I've been here for awhile and I know what to look for. New people coming here for support and seeing threads like this might think twice about sticking around, and that would be a shame, since there's a wealth of information to be mined here.

Deleting this thread would not make the thoughts go away, and in my experience, for every person bold enough to voice their thoughts there are hundreds more silently nodding their heads in understanding, if not agreement, but they are just reluctant to voice it out loud (or can't because they are not subscribed to be able to post). The only way we can address this type of thinking is to have dialogue, which in a forum means posting about it. I spoke my thoughts early on in this thread and our experienced members ie Lala and JCoily, always come out the wood work to speak truth and insert a dose of reality.

I don't see any reason for anyone to become discouraged. People need to know that there is not a miracle vitamin, potion or cream that is going to give you 24 inches of hair overnight, that caring for your hair takes time and patience, and that they need to focus on maintaining and protecting the length they have. This thread has brought that out.


As far as hair not budging, someone may come here with neck length hair and a year later still be at the same length, but what does it LOOK like? Is it still chewed up with damaged frizzy ends or does it now have healthy bounce, sheen and clean healthy ends? You have to grow the damage out before the healthy hair can coming in will be seen. Yes, you can sometimes keep the damaged hair and continue to grow it if you moisturize and protect it enough, but if it is already damaged, eventually it will have to go to have your hair look its best.

We have people here who have faster and slower growth rates, but if you are at the average 6 inches/year, that means it will take four years to get 24 inches (BSL on average folx). Thats IF you maintain it all/have no major cuts, etc. That's not to discourage, that is to inform. This isnt overnight. Yes we have people who get one inch in a month after they start taking vitamins or start a new growth aide, but most do not maintain that every single month, and that is still just a piece of the puzzle.

The bottom line is if you are willing to invest the time you will reap the rewards. IMO, this can only be discouraging if someone is looking for a quick fix.

 

[FlawedBeauty]

IMO, this can only be discouraging if someone is looking for a quick fix.

i respectfully disagree with that last sentce. i am not looking for a quick fix at all and know that growing out my hair will take lots of time and dedication. it was just kinda a kick in the balls for mem so to speak, because i am relatively new here, joined about a month and a week ago, and when i found it i was thinking to myself...wow!! yeah!!! we can all have long hair!! there is a way! wooohooo!!!! but then to read that some think it can't be done was kinda a downer thats all, and then that little bit of doubt creeps in saying, well what if i'm one of the ones that cant be saved...

 

[*Happily Me*]

i just typed a long response but eh... forget it

 

[Enchantmt]

i respectfully disagree with that last sentce. i am not looking for a quick fix at all and know that growing out my hair will take lots of time and dedication. it was just kinda a kick in the balls for mem so to speak, because i am relatively new here, joined about a month and a week ago, and when i found it i was thinking to myself...wow!! yeah!!! we can all have long hair!! there is a way! wooohooo!!!! but then to read that some think it can't be done was kinda a downer thats all, and then that little bit of doubt creeps in saying, well what if i'm one of the ones that cant be saved...

There will always be SOMEONE who SAYS it cant be done, but with all the overwhelming evidence on this site to the contrary why focus on the negative?

 

[ChocoKitty]

Get to Their Desired Lengths?

**Disclaimer PLEASE NO NAME CALLING OR ANYTHING! This isn't one of those calling out/negative posts, so please don't make it.

Do you beleive that for some people longer apl, bsl ,wsl, etc is just unattainable?

I was talking toone of my LHCF friendgirls last night through PM and I got to thinking about this question. I seen some people that hair won't budge. I was wondering, if it was only me that thought some people's hair probably will never make it to bsl or beyond. I hope this doesn't come off as catty but I honest want to see what you guys think.

Do you think that every last black women who puts her mind to it can grow hair to longer lengths? Why or why not?

I think anybody can grow hair to their desired length! They just to have a positive attitude about it.

 

[FlawedBeauty]

There will always be SOMEONE who SAYS it cant be done, but with all the overwhelming evidence on this site to the contrary why focus on the negative?

yeah..i'm over it...

 

[MissYocairis]

This whole entire thread reminds me of why there is an LOA principle that says you should always keep your goals and aspirations private or at least be very wary of who you share them with.

 

[Blkbeautyhair]

Wow! This is a very interesting thread. Sticking to the original question I do think that those that are determined and consistent will reach their goals. It may not be as quickly as some people whose hair seems to GLW but eventually they will get there with time. Could take years to reach waist length but as long as you don't sabatoge yourself it can happen.

 

[SweetCaramel1]

Get to Their Desired Lengths?

**Disclaimer PLEASE NO NAME CALLING OR ANYTHING! This isn't one of those calling out/negative posts, so please don't make it.

Do you beleive that for some people longer apl, bsl ,wsl, etc is just unattainable?

I was talking toone of my LHCF friendgirls last night through PM and I got to thinking about this question. I seen some people that hair won't budge. I was wondering, if it was only me that thought some people's hair probably will never make it to bsl or beyond. I hope this doesn't come off as catty but I honest want to see what you guys think.

Do you think that every last black women who puts her mind to it can grow hair to longer lengths? Why or why not?

i've read/seen so many threads and fotki's where ladies have obtained their goals. but they had to change their regimen. i think you have to find out what works or doesn't work for you and implement that. for some it's getting a relaxer 2-3 times a year, for others it's no relaxer period. once you find out what your hair likes, you and your hair will be much happier.
i was at a class reunion and the girl there ALWAYS had short hair (toni braxton). this was due to the relaxer breaking it off (her words not mine). she's natural now and easily past brastrap. so yes i do believe the goals are attainable. are you willing to do what it takes to get there is the question?

 

[lala]

i respectfully disagree with that last sentce. i am not looking for a quick fix at all and know that growing out my hair will take lots of time and dedication. it was just kinda a kick in the balls for mem so to speak, because i am relatively new here, joined about a month and a week ago, and when i found it i was thinking to myself...wow!! yeah!!! we can all have long hair!! there is a way! wooohooo!!!! but then to read that some think it can't be done was kinda a downer thats all, and then that little bit of doubt creeps in saying, well what if i'm one of the ones that cant be saved...

You can be saved sweetie. LHCF is your saving grace. You've got lots of resource here...start using them. You can counter that stereotype that we can't grow long hair by being consistent and doing what works for you. Don't fret and have some patience...you will get there. There are going to be varying opinions on this subject b/c there's no one true fix for growing our hair long. Figuring it out, can be a challenge. My hair didn't grow overnight. I followed a regimen and before I knew it...my hair was long. People tell me everyday that my hair length is not normal...like I'm some kind of freak. I don't believe that, and I know it isn't true.

 

[locabouthair]

This whole entire thread reminds me of why there is an LOA principle that says you should always keep your goals and aspirations private or at least be very wary of who you share them with.

this isn't toward u mizani. but i totally agree. that's why i don't tell anyone about my regimen or my goals. i don't need the negativity.

 

[locabouthair]

are you willing to do what it takes to get there is the question?

that's the question I had to ask myself today. Even if it means I'll have to sacrifice some weight by changing my diet, I really want longer hair.

 

[SweetCaramel1]

I feel that some people are predispositioned to EASILY achieve long hair. Some people can do all the wrong things and their hair will still be healthy and not break. quote]

i agree with this. my daughter is 4 years old and i work hard on her hair. i do all the right things: braid, wash, condition routinely. her hair is barely past her neck. meanwhile the other 4 year-old's in her class are rocking "brastrap" ponytails . so yes, i believe genetics play a part in "how fast" your hair grows. maintenance determines whether you'll keep it or not

 

[SweetCaramel1]

Deleting this thread would not make the thoughts go away, and in my experience, for every person bold enough to voice their thoughts there are hundreds more silently nodding their heads in understanding, if not agreement, but they are just reluctant to voice it out loud (or can't because they are not subscribed to be able to post). The only way we can address this type of thinking is to have dialogue, which in a forum means posting about it. I spoke my thoughts early on in this thread and our experienced members ie Lala and JCoily, always come out the wood work to speak truth and insert a dose of reality.

I don't see any reason for anyone to become discouraged. People need to know that there is not a miracle vitamin, potion or cream that is going to give you 24 inches of hair overnight, that caring for your hair takes time and patience, and that they need to focus on maintaining and protecting the length they have. This thread has brought that out.


As far as hair not budging, someone may come here with neck length hair and a year later still be at the same length, but what does it LOOK like? Is it still chewed up with damaged frizzy ends or does it now have healthy bounce, sheen and clean healthy ends? You have to grow the damage out before the healthy hair can coming in will be seen. Yes, you can sometimes keep the damaged hair and continue to grow it if you moisturize and protect it enough, but if it is already damaged, eventually it will have to go to have your hair look its best.

We have people here who have faster and slower growth rates, but if you are at the average 6 inches/year, that means it will take four years to get 24 inches (BSL on average folx). Thats IF you maintain it all/have no major cuts, etc. That's not to discourage, that is to inform. This isnt overnight. Yes we have people who get one inch in a month after they start taking vitamins or start a new growth aide, but most do not maintain that every single month, and that is still just a piece of the puzzle.

The bottom line is if you are willing to invest the time you will reap the rewards. IMO, this can only be discouraging if someone is looking for a quick fix.

wow, preach on sista'

 

[goldensensation]

Wow.

Hmmm... I do believe that it is possible that some people will never reach their hair goals. All hair grows... but it grows at different rates, different strengths (because of genetics and overall health,) and then there are factors such as incompatible products, water, diet, heat, handling... the list could go on forever. Bottom line, whatever factor is acting as a barrier to X's growth may not be the same as Y's. Until X finds out what has been stunting their hair growth/retention, their goals will not be met. Some people have more barriers than others. Some people will find ways to overcome them and some may not (genetics, health, et cetera).

 

[miss Congeniality]

Just finish reading all 15 pages, anyway...I can see how the question can be a little depressing. Only a few posters said that they themselves may not be able to obtain their goals. While the others (at least the initial posts) seem more to state that others will not reach their goals. It comes of as being judgmental. The only person I can speak for is me. Will I reach my hair goal? Maybe…but in the meantime I am going to enjoy learning how to take care of my hair, great products, cool methods, etc. I try not to get to obsessive with hair length, especially since my hair doesn’t grow down and I have crazy shrinkage. So, I think a better question would have been: Do you think you will ever reach your goal?

 

[KeraKrazy]

Just finish reading all 15 pages, anyway...I can see how the question can be a little depressing. Only a few posters said that they themselves may not be able to obtain their goals. While the others (at least the initial posts) seem more to state that others will not reach their goals. It comes of as being judgmental. The only person I can speak for is me. Will I reach my hair goal? Maybe…but in the meantime I am going to enjoy learning how to take care of my hair, great products, cool methods, etc. I try not to get to obsessive with hair length, especially since my hair doesn’t grow down and I have crazy shrinkage. So, I think a better question would have been: Do you think you will ever reach your goal?

Well said you took the words right outta my mouth, NOBODY likes negativity directed towards them (e.g. some people will not reach their goals). If you have doubts about your own hair then well thats another story.

 

[Cichelle]

This whole entire thread reminds me of why there is an LOA principle that says you should always keep your goals and aspirations private or at least be very wary of who you share them with.

Yes.

And without going into it, your post was a bit of synchronicity in my life just now.

 

[JewelleNY]

I truly believe that anyone's hair can grow with the right care and knowledge. I am at a length right now that I never thought possible for myself. I remember wearing braids at this length so it is weird to look back. Even my poor mom was like, "why couldn't I get your hair to grow like that when you were little???"

Just look at all of the ladies albums that went from such a short length to all of the way down their backs. I have seen so many women go through this journey on this site. All of you ladies can do it, don't let anyone stop you.

I went from having my hair in the back break off to about 1/2 inch to mid-back length within about 3 years, a little less. Plus, I cut a lot off during that time so it could have been way longer. Up the water intake, eat those veggies and study fotkis regularly You can do it

 

[determined_to_grow]

Co-signing w/ JewelleNY. Very well said, I would like to add that you need to have patience!!!!!

I truly believe that anyone's hair can grow with the right care and knowledge. I am at a length right now that I never thought possible for myself. I remember wearing braids at this length so it is weird to look back. Even my poor mom was like, "why couldn't I get your hair to grow like that when you were little???"

Just look at all of the ladies albums that went from such a short length to all of the way down their backs. I have seen so many women go through this journey on this site. All of you ladies can do it, don't let anyone stop you.

I went from having my hair in the back break off to about 1/2 inch to mid-back length within about 3 years, a little less. Plus, I cut a lot off during that time so it could have been way longer. Up the water intake, eat those veggies and study fotkis regularly You can do it

 

[Ebonygurl00]

If I offended anyone, I'm really sorry.

 

[secretdiamond]

This whole entire thread reminds me of why there is an LOA principle that says you should always keep your goals and aspirations private or at least be very wary of who you share them with.

So true. That's one of the reasons I don't post my specific goal in my siggy. And why I haven't told anyone I know that I'm trying to grow my hair long. They'll just see and believe it.

Another reason I love the fact you brought up the LOA priniciple is that if more people built their lives around it, less people will get offended by the initial post. I'm not trying to say it's their fault for not knowing the LOA, but knowing would help in the hair-growing experience.

Also, FlawedBeauty has a point. I say this b/c a lot of the times when there are touchy subjects, people always wonder how newbies or lurkers would feel and affect their outlook on growing hair. She's a newbie and I'm glad she posted her opinion and how she felt. All of our voices and opinions need to be heard-- whether they are popular or not-- as long as they are not attacking someone personally, IMO.